


The Thin Line Between Love and Hate

by KizuKatana



Category: Naruto
Genre: ALL THE ANGST (but then happiness), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Friends to Lovers, Gaara being extremely badass, Hate Sex, Hot make-up sex, Lovers To Enemies, M/M, Mutual Pining, NaruSasu and SasuNaru, Naruto learning to be on his own, Romance, Sasuke being an ass, Sasuke having to work for it, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-24
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2018-01-20 15:42:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 78,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1515956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KizuKatana/pseuds/KizuKatana
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke couldn't believe that Naruto had betrayed him. But he would make him pay... divorce was just the beginning. If there is one thing an Uchiha knows, it's how to utterly destroy someone. And he would ignore the little twinges of guilt, because he knew he was right. Wasn't he? NaruSasu, SasuNaru AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The End

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Naruto, and make nothing from this fic

**Warning 17+ only** : Hard Yaoi (Boy x Boy) - Homophobic readers please hit the back button NOW. Not appropriate for young readers.

 **Disclaimer** \- I don't own Naruto - Masashi Kishimoto does, unfortunately. And I know that gay marriage isn't legal in Japan, but that is why this is AU.

 **Author's note and additional warnings**... As you probably guessed, this story will have a good bit of angst, sex, and general bad relationship behavior, with hopefully some sweetness at the end. This chapter will actually be the worst in terms of bad relationship behavior - alcohol abuse, hate sex, and severe emotional fuckery. This is 'the break up' scene, so it is bad. But since I am starting the story here, hopefully that gives clues to how I am going to end it. This story is complete (just having trouble with formatting so it takes me time to get the chapters posted here), and is 9 chapters long.

-xXx-

 _I can't fucking believe that bastard._ Naruto thought hazily, staring down at the empty drink in his hand, idly watching a drip of condensation roll down the side of the glass. He had lost count at this point on how many he'd had. After all we went through together, he won't even tell me why. _That fucking ice princess_.

He motioned the bartender for another. Naruto didn't register the man's concerned look. His parents' death, Itachi's accident, his general fucked up insecurities and paranoias. _I stood by him through all his shit. Since we were fucking 12, I have been his best friend. God damn him. Now he says it was all just nothing? Just sex? We were married for three years, and it was all just nothing?_

Naruto felt a wave of anguish wash over him as he remembered the day that they had gotten married. It had been warm and sunny. And perfect. Everyone had been so happy for them. The Golden Couple, the had called us. Naruto sneered uncharacteristically. One of the first gay couples in Japan to have married. Sasuke had come from one of the wealthiest and most powerful families in Japan, and he had taken a risk to be so open about their relationship. And now...

"Excuse me, is this seat taken?" Naruto looked up fuzzily to see a gorgeous red-head in a tiny dress with significant cleavage leaning towards him, smiling invitingly.

 _Seriously, what is with these people?_ Naruto thought irritably. It was the sixth or seventh interruption since he'd sat at the bar. Five women and two men. But Naruto's response was always the same. "I'm married," he flashed his ring and turned back to his drink. _At least I was_.

He had no notion of how attractive he looked with his black jeans and white button-down shirt, an orange T-shirt peeking out underneath, golden hair messily sticking up. He was just over six feet tall, with the broader frame of his ancestry making him stick out about as much as his coloring in a room full of Japanese. But it had never been something he thought much about, or been particularly vain about. All that had mattered to him was that he was attractive to the one person who mattered. _I can't believe it's over_ , he thought numbly. Tonight was the last night he'd have keys to their house. He had designed it with the architect when they had gotten married. They had lived together in that house for almost three years. Three amazing years. _Now it's over._ Out of the blue, Sasuke had told him he had a week to sign the divorce papers he had presented him with ( _left on my fucking desk_ ) pack his stuff and get out. Then the asshole had just left on a week-long business trip to the US.

Wouldn't talk to him. Wouldn't meet with him. Wouldn't return his calls. With no explanation as to why. Just that he was done with Naruto. All he would say was that he found him inconvenient to have in his house. Incon-fucking-venient! There had been no shouting, no fight. _It's like he fired me, like I was just some sort of employee filling the role of husband, and he fired me. Didn't even care enough to make it a proper break-up_. After being together in some form or another for more than ten years, he felt like he deserved a fucking breakup. And a reason. But he knew Sasuke. Knew him as well as he knew himself. And he knew it was really over. And that Sasuke would never tell him why. That door had already been shut, locked and fireballed to hell. And he would never know why.

 _He'll be back in the country tomorrow_ , Naruto thought hollowly. _I can't see him again. I can't let him tear me down any more, or I might never get the pieces back together again. I need to be out of here before noon tomorrow_.

He had already had the movers take the few things that were actually his from the house, mostly from the room on the second floor where he painted, sketched blueprints and generally "did his creative thing" as Sasuke used to call it. After college, they had started their own company together. Itachi was running the family mega-corporation, and rather than being 'second in command', Sasuke had decided he wanted to try a venture on his own. Itachi had been the angel investor (and they had laughed so hard over that financial term being applied to Itachi) for the new corporation supplying the seed money. Naruto had been the creative genius behind it, blending his technical knowledge and intuition for people, and Sasuke had applied his financial and business savvy. They had met with tremendous success in every business they took on. But more than the thrill of the financial success, it had been fun. Working with his best friend, and building something from nothing. Combining their natural strengths and abilities. Naruto sighed, and thought dully that he should sell his 33% share of the company to Sasuke or Itachi. He knew he could never work there again. With him. And Sasuke could run things just fine without him. _Sasuke can always manage anything_. He felt the bitterness well up again.

Naruto was only taking things that had belonged to him prior to their marriage from their home, and that wasn't much. Any of the things they had bought together he wasn't touching. They just had too many painful memories associated with it. There was just the clothing left at this point. He would go there tonight, and sleep one last night alone in that enormous bed that he had shared with Sasuke. He shivered as he remembered all the things that they - _Stop it! It's over. And that fucking asshole has finished it. Just pack your shit and get the hell out of here_. He paid the bill at the bar, and staggered out and caught a cab to his home. His ex-home. He made up the steps to the entryway of the house, trying to suppress the memories of all the times he and Sasuke had walked them together. And what so often happened as soon as they were inside those large paneled doors.

Why had he even come back tonight? He should have just had the movers pack his clothes for him and sort them later. Why was he doing this to himself? _Because it has to be a clean break, or I won't be able to heal. I need to leave behind anything that has too many memories of him_. He fumbled with the keys, leaning heavily against the door as the world spun around him. He didn't usually drink. He couldn't even remember the last time he had been this smashed. But it didn't matter now. He just had to get through this last night, then he was fucking out of here. Out of Japan and out of that sadistic bastard's life for good. He'd go somewhere far away and start picking up the pieces. He just needed to make it out of here without seeing Sasuke. He knew he couldn't take it, or he'd break.

The house was dark, but he didn't bother turning on the lights. They had lived here for three years, and he knew where he was going. He staggered up the curved staircase and down the hall to their bedroom. He'd just throw the clothes he was keeping on the bed for the movers to take in the morning, after he had sorted out any that reminded him of Sasuke. Then he'd go sleep it off in one of the guest rooms, and be out of here before Sasuke got back at noon. There was no way he could sleep in their bed again. Not after everything that had happened.

"Fucking bastard. God I hate you for doing this," he whispered to the empty room.

And was shocked when he heard it whisper back. "You're the one who ruined this. Don't act all sad now just because you got caught," the voice was one he recognized instantly. It's tone and timbre were seared into Naruto's being. But the sheer hatred that laced it was new to him. At least, new for being directed at him.

"Sasuke?" He hated how weak his voice sounded. Hated how weak he was to still feel the love and longing crash through him just knowing they were together in this room again. It was the first time he had been alone with Sasuke since everything went to hell. And he still had no idea why, what had changed. He didn't realize he had asked the question out loud.

"Who says anything changed? Maybe we both just need to wake up to the reality of what it has always been. I mean really," Naruto didn't need to be able to see in the darkness to detect Sasuke's sneer. "- did you ever think I could love someone like you? That you would really be enough for me to last? What could you possibly bring into this relationship, other than a decent piece of ass. But now even that has gotten tiring. So it's time you got your own life now and got the fuck out of mine." Sasuke's voice was absolutely flat.

Naruto felt a chill across his skin. Even when they were rivals back in grade school and high school, it had never been like this. There had at least been the seeds of friendship even through their worst fights, and later something more, beneath the rivalry. There had always been some underlying warmth. But this feeling now was ice cold. There was nothing left. Naruto took a step into the room, stumbling a bit as he did so.

"You're drunk?" Sasuke sounded slightly surprised. He'd never seen Naruto drunk, except when they had turned 20 and were finally legal. But even then, he had only gotten buzzed. Tonight, Naruto was absolutely plastered, swaying just to stand up.

"What the hell do you care," Naruto slurred. "You weren't supposed to be here. You gave me until noon. It's not fucking noon yet."

"I thought I'd just make sure you didn't take anything that didn't belong to you. And of course, I was curious to see if you'd have any of your little friends help you with the packing. Someone to help you give this bed one last go before you leave."

"You fucking asshole. Don't try to make me out as the one who lost interest... the one who walked away. You're the one who fucking fired me from being your husband. You didn't even have the balls to tell me why. Just dropped the papers on my desk and walked out," Naruto was shaking with anger and hurt. The room was spinning, but all he could see was Sasuke getting up and walking over to him. Their eyes were level with each other, the anger and pain radiating from blue, and sheer ice from black.

"What else do you expect? Any sub-par performer in my company knows they won't last long. Why should it be any different in my personal life?" Sasuke's voice was emotionless poison. If Naruto had been sober, maybe he would have had the strength to not rise to the bait. Maybe. But his barriers were all down, so he just lashed back out.

"Sub-par,  _Sub-par?_ Ten days ago I fucked you until you passed out.  YOu were begging me... _begging me_ to take you.  You could hardly get on the plane to go to that business meeting in Okinawa you were so sore.  Then you come back - and _dump me?_ After you left I got food poisoning and was in the hospital for two days.  And somehow, between fucking you senseless and getting sick, I became _sub-_ _par_?"

If Naruto had his usual wits about him, he would have seen the flicker of subtler emotions flash across his lover's face. The hurt, the love, the worry, but all he could sense was the overwhelming fury that was pumping off Sasuke in waves.

"If all I wanted was a lay, I could just get a whore. And hey, then at least I'd have variety, right? I mean, seriously, do you have any idea how many offers I get in one week alone? Can you really claim to be better than all of them? I doubt it."

Naruto went white. "Is that... is that really all this is to you now? I was with you when you got the news about your parents. I go with you every week to visit Itachi in the hosp-"

"Shut up!"

Sasuke's hand flew out and he backhanded Naruto across the face. It was hard to tell who looked more shocked, as the two stared at each other for an elongated second.

"You... you fucking slapped me? Like I'm your bitch?" Naruto grabbed Sasuke by his collar and slammed him up against the wall. "You fucking pussy. If you want to fight me, then at least fight me like a man. Let's have it out right here."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed. He thrust his hands up between Naruto's arms, and struck outward, hard, hitting Naruto's forearms and forcing Naruto to break his grip on Sasuke's shirt. He tried to follow up with a short punch to Naruto's stomach, but even drunk the man had good reflexes and blocked him. Sasuke was less quick blocking Naruto's counter puch, which caught him in the jaw. It had been a long time since they had fought like this. Since middle school. But it all came back to them now. Sasuke's elbow flew out and caught Naruto in the chest. Normally, Naruto would have just pivoted and returned, but his balance was basically swimming in tequila, so he just tipped over, grabbing Sasuke's shirt and taking him down with him. They wrestled on the floor, each trying to get an arm free enough to punch the other, but suddenly the heat and pace changed and they both realized the big difference between rolling around as 12-year-olds and rolling around after years of having scalding hot sex together.

Even through the alcohol haze, Naruto knew this was a _horrendously_ bad idea, but the feel of his lover's body hard and hot against his just drowned out all rational thought. He pulled Sasukes's mouth down roughly and kissed him. To his surprise, he felt Sasuke return the kiss. But this kiss bore absolutely no resemblance to any of the kisses they had shared in the past. This kiss was full of hate and anger. There was no gentleness, no affection. It was bruising and meant to hurt and punish. But it was still hot as hell and they couldn't pull away. The force of their desperation and fury incinerated any thought processes or judgment, and they were pushing up against each other, gasping with the fierceness of the arousal it created in both of them. There were no gentle caresses, no friendly banter. Sasuke roughly forced his hands under Naruto's shirt, feeling his hard abs flex with their movement, and slid his palm down over Naruto's rock-hard arousal, which was straining the zipper of his jeans. They both groaned. Naruto pulled down the collar on Sasuke's shirt and sucked on the sensitive spot just at the juncture of his neck, feeling Sasuke shudder and pick up the pace as he thrust his erection against Naruto's through their pants. Naruto shoved up Sasuke's shirt, his tongue laving over the pale chest to swirl around the nipple.

But Sasuke didn't want foreplay. He shoved Naruto's face down to his crotch, and Naruto didn't hesitate to unzip the black jeans and pull out the marble-hard cock. All he could think about was being with Sasuke one last time. Making him remember everything they had had together. Even though he knew it was too late now. He could still make Sasuke regret throwing it all away. He curled his fingers around the pale, hard cock and pulled the head into his mouth, feeling Sasuke shudder and hearing his growl of impatience. He twisted his hand back and forth on the base of Sasuke's erection and began sucking and swirling his tongue around the head and across the slit as he did, feeling Sasuke go mindless with need. After all their years together, Naruto knew all the right buttons, all the right spots. He didn't bother to hold his lover's hips as Sasuke thrust deep in his mouth, taking the considerable length all at a go.

"Nar-," Sasuke choked back saying his name. "Take it all, you fucking asshole."

And he came hard down Naruto's throat, pumping his release while fisting his hands into blond hair. As soon as he had finished, Naruto flipped him over; Sasuke heard the sound of Naruto's zipper. Naruto had half expected Sasuke to leave after finding his own release, but he didn't complain as Naruto reached for the lube above them on the nightstand. Mimicking his friends words with his own actions, he put the lube on his erection and entered him in one hard thrust.

"Ungh." Sasuke grunted at the sudden entry, but was already pushing back against him in rhythm with his thrusts.

They had had sex countless times, but this was the first time that they truly were just fucking. There were no words of affection, no teasing, nothing that you couldn't get from any stranger on the street. Except their unique heat, the way they fit together, the way they belonged together. That was still the same. Only now it was just raw lust, full of anger, dark with hate. Naruto felt Sasuke's body clench, and heard him shout hoarsely through his release. Naruto followed seconds later, collapsing next to Sasuke on the floor, panting, the room spinning. He was starting to feel nauseous. He realized his hand was resting on Sasuke's hip when the man flung it off, pulling himself away and disengaging their bodies. Sasuke got up, pulling his pants up and tucking in his shirt. Another first for them. Usually they stayed together after sex, just letting their bodies cool and feeling the light touch of the other at their side. Naruto was usually the first to recover, and get them cleaned up. But that was when they had cared for each other. Loved each other.

"I can't believe I just let you fuck me without a condom. If you gave me something, I swear I will hunt you down and castrate you." Sasuke turned, and walked over to his jacket, pulling something out of his pocket. "I guess I should pay you for your services."

He wrote out a check, tore it out of the book, and slapped it down on the nightstand. "If I didn't add it up right, you can just add it to the divorce settlement. I figure about $100 a go for a decently skilled whore. This should about cover our relationship to date. Don't expect anything more. And don't expect to get another fucking penny from me. I'll be back at noon. You'd better be gone."

Naruto's head was reeling. He could hardly keep his eyes open. He wished he would just fucking pass out already. What was the point of drinking so much if he had to still be conscious for this? He hoped in the back of his head that he'd throw up all over Sasuke's precious Persian carpet before morning. But despite himself, he couldn't help asking one last time.

"Sasuke. Why?" Sasuke just looked down at him for a second. Then turned and walked to the door, pulling his jacked on.

"Because I'm done with you." He walked down the wall, and pretended he hadn't seen the tears on the golden face he had loved for more than half his life. Pretended he didn't hear the soft, broken sobs from the man on the floor of his bedroom.

-xXx-

Naruto woke up in the early dawn. He wished he had just stayed passed out. He looked at the rug. _No puke. Damn_. Mechanically, he picked up the check that Sasuke had written out. $500,000. At $100 a go, Sasuke must have estimated we'd had sex five thousand times. Naruto thought over the past 10 years they'd been together. That sounded about right. He ripped the check up into as small of pieces as he could and sprinkled it over the bed; then he went and took a shower.

Wrapped in a thick towel, he walked over to the massive walk-in closet that they had shared, ignoring the scent of Sasuke that filled it. More than three quarters of the closet was filled with Sasuke's clothes... he'd always been more into appearances than Naruto. Naruto pulled a sweatshirt and some jeans on, then grabbed one of the suitcases and opened it up, throwing in his T-shirts, jeans, and sweats. Anything that Sasuke had bought for him or helped pick out landed in a heap on the floor. When the suitcase was full, he zipped it closed. All the suits had been purchased by Sasuke, so they were staying. It looked like the movers weren't going to have much to do with his clothes after all. He flipped open his phone and dialed them, letting them know they didn't need to come back, and just to put everything they had already taken into storage.

He walked to the safe and opened it, taking out his passport but leaving everything else. It was all either Sasuke's or something that Sasuke had bought for him. None of it was coming with him. He thought about calling Shikamaru. He had handled all the legal matters for them in the past, but he was acting on Sasuke's behalf in the divorce. Plus Naruto didn't want to talk to someone who was in Sasuke's employ. He didn't want Sasuke to know anything about his life any more. So he called the only other attorney he knew.

"Gaara, it's Naruto. I need you to handle some legal matters for me. It's about my divorce. And my company. Can you meet me at the airport at 4 o'clock?"

-xXx-

Sasuke walked through their house. _My house, now. At least for a little while_. The realtor would be there in a few minutes. He had been surprised that Naruto had given up the house without challenge, since Naruto had been the one to design most of it. Sasuke had wanted him to fight for it. When he had handed Naruto the divorce papers and told him to get out within the week, he had expected Naruto to try for the house. He had wanted it to hurt Naruto that he was going to take it away. But Naruto hadn't batted an eye. Hadn't even seemed to care. He had just been so fixated at trying to make Sasuke actually admit that he knew that Naruto had betrayed him. Which Sasuke would never, ever do.

That would be admitting that Naruto had won. That Naruto had successfully fooled him. So Naruto could rot in hell. He had to admit that Naruto been pretty good at pretending to have no idea why it was happening. Looking so _hurt_ and _confused_. _Fuck him. Of course he knows why_. All the ridiculous voicemails he had left Sasuke during the week after he had handed Naruto the divorce papers, wanting to talk about it. Sounding so pathetic and asking why, why, _why_ until Sasuke wanted to just delete that word from existence. He fucking hated the word _why._ But he was not going to give Naruto the satisfaction of making him voice it out loud. Of letting him see how much damage he had wrought. _He fucking knows._

Then Sasuke had assumed Naruto would at least gut the place, taking everything of value. But again, Naruto was perversely denying him. He had taken almost nothing. Only Naruto's own drafting table. The art supplies and easels. The horrible orange sofa that Naruto had kept with him since college, never allowing Sasuke to throw it out. Sasuke had finally insisted that if they absolutely had to keep it, it would go up in Naruto's work room where no one else had to look at it. Now it was gone.

 _I don't miss it._ Sasuke told himself. _I don't_. He looked around the room that had been Naruto's domain. It had been colorful, disorganized, full of life. Now it was empty, except for a few canvasses facing the wall. Sasuke walked over, turning them around, already knowing what they would be. Paintings of Sasuke. He looked at the images of himself. Naruto captured so much detail and emotion in his paintings. Sasuke wanted to burn them all. He didn't want to see the emotions in his face that he used to have when he looked at Naruto. He didn't want these to serve as record of the things Naruto had seen in him, the things that Naruto had been able to draw out of him.

Sasuke picked one up, looking at it. The Sasuke in the painting was looking directly at the painter, a slow, sexy smile on his face. Sasuke threw it as hard as he could against the wall, the frame breaking into splinters on impact. He turned to walk out of the room. It was empty, lifeless, and now broken. _Just like me_ , a voice in his mind whispered.

He walked back through the house. All the furniture they had picked out together was still here, untouched. The china they had received as a wedding present. The original artwork on the wall, some of it quite valuable. Naruto had picked out most of that. Still here. Why didn't he take it? It was clear now that Naruto hadn't stayed with him for love. _So it must have been for the money. Just like everyone else_. But it pissed Sasuke off that Naruto wasn't confirming this for him. He had left it wide open. Why wasn't Naruto finally showing his true colors? _He knows it's over. He knows me well enough to know I am not bluffing. This was his last chance to take this stuff. Why didn't he take it_?

It pissed him off. He didn't like being wrong. Twice. The doorbell rang. Sasuke went and let in the realtor, and told him to just look around and do what he had to do, then see himself out and list the house for what he thought it was worth. It took an hour, with the man taking photos of the various rooms, then finally he was gone. And Sasuke was alone.

He walked up the curved stairs and down the hall to the bedroom. Their bedroom. Sasuke set the tools down that he had carried into the bedroom with him. The room still faintly smelled like sex. And like Naruto. Visions of the night before flashed back through his mind. That had been a colossal fucking mistake. He never should have touched him. But seeing Naruto drunk, so vulnerable, he knew that he would be able to touch him, to have him, and not be rejected. And he had just wanted, so desperately, to be touched by Naruto one last time. _So fucking weak_.

He would have to stay away from Naruto for a bit. He just couldn't look at that tangled, golden hair or those sapphire-blue eyes and not respond. Naruto's tan body was broader in the shoulder and slightly more muscled than his pale one. And he had always reveled in that difference. Reveled in the fact that he was able to completely possess such a beautiful creature, despite all the darkness in his own soul. Sasuke's gut clenched. _Never. I will NEVER forgive him_. As expected, Naruto was gone.

 _Probably moved into some penthouse with one of his whores. I wonder which one he picked... Hinata or Sakura_? Sasuke thought bitterly. Maybe it would be someone he hadn't even met yet. At this point, nothing would surprise him. It burned him to know that Naruto was out somewhere probably having someone tend his hangover, talking about how pathetic it had been that Sasuke had slept with him one last time, even knowing what he knew.

 _Naruto had NOTHING before we were together. He was just some low-class orphan, with no talent and no_ \- Sasuke cut himself off. No. He wouldn't lie to himself. Naruto had always been exceptionally talented. He was creative and good with technical things and funny and intuitive and honest. _No. Not so honest._ Bitterness hit Sasuke so hard he thought for a moment he was going to vomit. But he quelled it down. _Never again. I will NEVER let anyone fool me again_.

He walked to the closet. Saw the clothes piled up on the floor. He nudged them with his foot, looking through them. All things he had bought for Naruto, or picked out for him. Dumped on the floor, like garbage. He felt sick. He turned and walked back into the bedroom. Looking down at the bed, he noticed the scraps of paper scattered across it. He picked one up, immediately recognizing it as pieces of the check he had left Naruto with the night before. Again, he was surprised. He had assumed that Naruto would take the money. After all, it was apparently one of the main reasons he had stuck around so long.

Because clearly, it hadn't been what Sasuke had thought all these years. It hadn't been love. It hadn't been real. _It had all been a fucking lie_.

He walked back to where he had set the items down when he first entered the room, and picked up the long carving knife. He walked over to the bed and grabbed the crimson sheets in his hand. He remembered the photo he had seen of Naruto in these exact sheets. Naruto and -

He took the knife and systematically slashed the sheets to shreds. Then he dumped them in the fireplace. He knelt on the bed and plunged the knife in deep, tearing into the mattress. Cutting it to ribbons. He threw it off to the side, then went pack and put the knife back down and picked up the sledge hammer. He felt nothing as he broke the heavy teak frame into kindling, smashing it to bits, refusing to think of all the things they had done together on that bed. As though crushing its existence would erase everything that had happened. Make it not exist. Make it not hurt.

He sat on the floor, sweaty and panting. Glad he could not see the dead agony in his own onyx eyes. His realtor had already found him a suitable apartment. He would never have to come back to this place. He would pull himself together.

And he would make sure that absolutely everyone knew that he was not mourning his cheating ex-lover. Hell, ever since he was 10, people had been lining up to fuck him, men and women. But the only one he had ever loved was Naruto. But last night had shown him something. You don't need love to fuck. Hate worked just as well. And he was absolutely _brimming_ with hate.

He would fuck whomever he wanted fueled with his hate for Naruto, and he would make it as public as possible, so Naruto would know what it felt like.

-xXx-

to be continued... please comment? It is actually quite painful to reformat the stories and post them here, so if people don't comment, I probably wont' continue to post here until the site gets easier to use.


	2. The Wreckage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note - This chapter will be the darkest in terms of hitting emotional rock bottom. The song that probably best captures the mood is "Hurt" by Nine Inch Nails. Brought up bad memories for me writing this, so it took a while, but... the next chapter will start to see things looking up.

-xXx- The wreckage of Sasuke - xXx-

Sasuke woke up, his head pounding. He felt like hell. He looked over at the naked woman in bed with him, and felt his skin crawl with revulsion. So this is what a one night stand felt like. He didn't know her name, or anything at all about her. He must have passed out last night after they had sex, because he definitely hadn't been planning on staying the night. His body felt sticky and smelled of sex. It made him think of STDs and other unpleasant things, and he felt his stomach roil. He looked around. At least the bedroom looked clean. Hopefully she didn't have anything contagious. He saw the used condom on the bed. Thank god he'd had the presence of mind to use protection. That was one thing he was pretty sure he would have to be literally passed out drunk to forget to use, given his general dislike of intimacy. He extracted himself from the bed and staggered to her bathroom, locking the door and turning the shower on. He scrubbed himself almost raw under scalding water; there was no way he was getting back into his clothes with her scent still on him. He was glad he had been drunk enough that most of the night was hazy. He tried to shut out thoughts of crabs or herpes that can get transmitted even with a condom. He should have drunk more. Maybe then he would not have woken up sober. Sasuke decided that being sober was the thing he hated most. Second most, he corrected. Second to Naruto.

But it would be worth it. When he had come staggering out of the club with the voluptuous blonde all over him, the paparazzi had been there in full force to capture the moment. He was sure it would be all over the tabloids, if not the mainstream media. He had realized that women were not his taste long ago. They had the wrong shape, wrong sounds and wrong scent. But that had never stopped them from swarming him in the past, and when he had shown up at a popular night club and made it clear he was interested, it had been a fucking feeding frenzy to see who would get to bed him first. And for the first time in his life, he had been grateful for the attention and that all he had to do was just sit there. Because while a drunken sex binge might be slightly looked down on by the business elite, a drunken GAY sex binge could cause his company serious reputational damage. So Sasuke had known that - if he wanted to extract his public revenge on Naruto while coming out of it relatively unscathed - he would have to go with girls. And Sasuke had found that if he drank _enough_ he couldn't really see who he was with or think much beyond the feeling of someone sucking him off or riding his cock, and he could manage to get it up. And right now, that was all that mattered. He wanted it to be front page news that he had moved on, that he was single and reveling in it.

He looked at his reflection in the mirror. _Yeah, reveling in it,_ he thought numbly. There were hickies on his neck, making it clear exactly what he had spent the night doing. To anyone else, he would have appeared classically beautiful and stoic after a night of wild sex. But Sasuke knew better. He was soiled and empty. His theory that he would enjoy sex just as much with someone other than Naruto had been proven hideously wrong. He scrubbed his fingers through his hair. Hopefully it was just women. After a week or two of hitting the major club scenes, maybe he could go to some of the more exclusive gay clubs and find someone he was actually attracted to. But in the meantime, he would just focus on getting his revenge. And he would ignore the hollow feeling inside him.

He couldn't wait until tomorrow in the office. Naruto had been gone when he had returned to the house on Saturday. He hadn't been surprised that the blond hadn't tried to call him over the weekend. Not really. Sasuke hadn't returned the 300 calls that he had left earlier, so clearly Naruto had gotten the message that he was not going to resolve this. But by Monday, if Naruto hadn't already seen the papers, one if their friends would have and called Naruto and told him. Sasuke would get to see how his ex liked having his face rubbed in it.

He just had to kill the hours between now and then. He looked at his watch. It was 11am. Oh, well. It was 5pm somewhere. He let himself out of the woman's apartment before she woke up and called his driver, telling him to pick up a bottle of gin and some orange juice on the way. Breakfast of fucking champions.

. . . . . .

"He _what_?" Sasuke glared at Kiba, his head of HR, daring the man to repeat what he had just told him. His head was still pounding from his binge over the weekend. He had hit the clubs again on Sunday night, leaving with a brunette that time, with similar results. Though he had learned from his first experience. He had done a better job of getting himself completely wasted the second time, and had managed to leave before passing out so at least he woke up in his own bed. He had arrived to work an hour late, and severely hung over. Possibly still a little drunk. He decided that was a much better way to operate. The less time he had to actually spend thinking about what he was doing, the better. Kiba was repeating himself, and clearly taking great pleasure in telling him this news.

"Like I said, Naruto told me when he left for work on Friday that he would be taking a leave of absence, and that I should start searching for a head of marketing, head of creative development, and head of business development to take over for him. He dropped off the job descriptions before he left the office. And said that if I had any questions on specific candidates, I should ask you. He also said that if you wanted a COO, you could write that description yourself and have that person manage these other roles so you don't have to deal with so many people."

Normally, Kiba would have been nervous to be so blunt with him. After all, Sasuke was his boss. But he had seen the destroyed look on Naruto's face when Sasuke had served him with divorce papers in the office. He had watched the man he had admired slowly crumble to pieces and fall apart over the week that Sasuke had been off on his business trip. And he had seen the complete despair in blue eyes that had always glowed with life and happiness when he had told Kiba to look for his replacement. And right now, Kiba didn't give a flying fuck if his other boss was pissed at him. Because Kiba was pissed at Sasuke. And so was the rest of the office. They had seen the tabloids over the weekend.

Of the two co-owners, everyone knew that Naruto was 'the nice one'. He was funny, creative, energetic, and genuinely cared about their employees. He was personal friends with everyone in the office, and new everything about their families, talents, and aspirations. He took on the _de facto_ role of the three functions that Kiba had just laid out for the organization. Sasuke handled the business, finance, and PR side of things. As well as any mergers or acquisitions that the company made. The employees respected Sasuke, and either feared or lusted over the man. Often both. And one of his main redeeming traits that kept him from being labeled a complete asshole was the obvious love that Sasuke showed for Naruto. Whenever Sasuke started to go off on someone, Naruto would infallibly walk in and snake an arm around the man's waist and nuzzle his neck, and Sasuke would roll his eyes in apparent annoyance but his face would soften and the crisis would be over. They would see the soft looks that the stoic, dark-haired man would send the blond when he thought no one was looking. And it made him seem human. They were the perfect pair, and together the organization ran like a machine.

But now it was all falling apart.

"Where. is. he. He can't just walk out on his business obligations. I won't let him," Sasuke looked furious.

Kiba bared his teeth in a fake smile. "I am happy to be able to tell you that I honestly have no idea. I tried to call his cell over the weekend to see if he was ok, but his number is no longer in service. And I have asked every one of his friends, including Shikamaru, and no one has any idea at all on how to reach him. So if you were hoping to enjoy seeing how your huge assholeness has destroyed probably the nicest human being you will ever meet, it looks like you are just shit out of luck."

Sasuke was shocked by the verbal assault delivered from his normally relatively respectful head of HR.

"Oh, and if you decide to fire me for saying this, I honestly don't give a fuck." Kiba turned on his heel and stalked away. Sasuke's eyes narrowed when he saw several people in the office lift their hands to give him high fives as he walked past their desks.

_So they think Naruto is the victim in all this? Fuck them. They have no idea. But it doesn't matter. I don't want to be the victim anyway. I am not weak._

He went into his office, shut the door, and called Shikamaru. The man handled their personal and business legal matters. There is no way that he didn't know how to contact Naruto, no matter what that idiot Kiba said.

A few minutes later, the smartest man that Sasuke had ever met was in his office. His brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail, his suit pressed, intelligent brown eyes deceptively lazy.

"Where is he?" Sasuke hissed.

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, but didn't bother pretending to misunderstand. "I don't know."

"What do you mean _you don't fucking know._ He is co-owner of this business, we are in the middle of divorce proceedings, and you are our attorney. There is no way in hell that you can't know where he is. He must have contacted you about the divorce papers, if nothing else."

Shikamaru sighed. This was going to be a huge pain. They were both such drama queens. He almost smirked at his own pun, but the situation was too messed up to be funny. "Actually, I received notification from Sabaku Gaara's offices over the weekend that they would be handling all of Naruto's legal matters. Something about there being a conflict of interest with me representing both of you."

Sasuke's eyes widened. This was not something he had expected Naruto to think of doing. _Fucking Gaara._ He was the only person in Japan that Sasuke knew for a fact he could neither bribe nor intimidate nor charm into doing what he wanted. While most of their friends were mutual, Gaara was Naruto's friend, not his. Naruto had met him while traveling with his godfather when he was younger, and the two had kept in touch over the years. Gaara had come to the wedding, and generally had been polite to Sasuke, but his complete loyalty was to Naruto. Evidently Naruto had helped him out with something in his formative years, or some bullshit like that, and they had been tight ever since. If Sasuke hadn't known that Gaara was straight, he would have put a stop to it long ago. He had never really liked the redhead. That feeling had just increased by several orders of magnitude.

"Tell Gaara that I want those divorce papers and the financial settlement papers signed within the week. Tell him to get Naruto's ass in here for a meeting to finalize terms," Sasuke growled.

Shikamaru sighed. He knew his chance of bullying Gaara into doing what Sasuke wanted was exactly zero. But he would go through the motions to get Sasuke off his back.

Shikamaru had no idea what had really happened between him and Naruto. He had talked to Naruto about it last week, and he was sure that the blond honestly had no idea why Sasuke had ended things this way. Naruto had been completely shell-shocked. Shikamaru had been friends with both of them since middle school, and it hurt him to see them suffering. Given everything the two men had been through together, the thought of their relationship being over just seemed... impossible. He sighed again.

He could smell the alcohol on Sasuke's breath, and saw the open decanter on his desk. Sasuke was clearly hurting, though most people wouldn't see it. Naruto always wore his heart on his sleeve, and people loved him for it. Sasuke was closed, keeping everyone at a distance and leaving most people with the impression that he simply didn't have emotions. But Shikamaru had known them both long enough to know that Sasuke had emotions that ran just as deep as Naruto's, if not deeper. He just kept them bottled up and hidden from view, except when it had come to Naruto. The depth of feeling that the two men had for each other had always been a source of almost envy for Shikamaru. He had never seen two people more deeply committed to each other, accepting not only the nice 'good' parts, but also accepting and even loving each other's flaws. Of any couple he had ever seen, he had thought these two would make it. And he had been wrong, which almost never happened to him. Looking at the bleak expression in the black eyes of his friend, he wished like hell he had not been wrong on this one. He didn't know where Naruto was right now, but he was worried. He honestly didn't know if either man could really survive without the other.

"Sasuke," Shikamaru began, ignoring the warning look his friend shot him. "What happened?"

Sasuke's eyes simply shuttered into their usual expressionless mask. "I terminated a dysfunctional relationship. I just need you to do your job and make it official. Go get Gaara to cooperate."

Shikamaru heard the clear dismissal in his friend's voice, and ached for him. Sasuke never knew how to ask for or accept help. The only one who had ever been able to really draw him out was Naruto. "You can call me, if you want to talk."

Sasuke just stood there, then nodded almost imperceptibly. Shikamaru left. There was nothing more he could do. Except call Gaara.

. . . . . .

The meeting with Gaara had gone largely as expected. The man was and always been smart and ruthless, especially when it came to protecting one of the few people that mattered to him. In a way, he was a lot like Sasuke. Which meant this was going to get very ugly.

_"I'm sure you know why I'm here, Gaara-san," Shikamaru said. He had always rather liked the green-eyed man, and respected his formidable intelligence and legal savvy._

_Gaara had eyed him coldly, and nodded._

_"Sasuke wants the divorce papers and financial settlement documents signed and filed by the end of the week."_

_Gaara had simply raised a hairless eyebrow. "I'll see what I can do, but my client is rather busy at the moment. With matters of importance. I have read through the original proposal, and we will have some adjustments to make. I will work with my client over the next few weeks to get our response to you."_

_Shikamaru could sense the underlying fury in the man in front of him. "Gaara. I know I am representing Sasuke. But I have been friends with Naruto for most of my life. You don't need to tell me where he is or what you are planning. But... can you just tell me... is he ok?"_

_Gaara had looked at him consideringly for a moment, then he had imperceptibly softened. "No. He is not ok. And while I respect that you have a job to do for Sasuke, and I am well aware of your intellectual prowess, I want you to know that if I need to, I will utterly destroy Sasuke to protect Naruto. You play by the rules. I don't. I have taken measures to be sure that Naruto will not be found until he is ready to. Tell Sasuke that if he tries too hard, I will put a very public restraining order on him. I will be the only point of contact in these legal proceedings."_

_Shikamaru had stood there, torn between feeling slightly nervous about what the smaller man in front of him might actually do, and relieved that Naruto had someone like this to protect him from Sasuke. He was going to need it. The two men nodded at each other, and Shikamaru took his leave. Sasuke was not going to like what he had to say._

xXx-

Sasuke was furious. His pounding hangover didn't help. Three months. It had been _three fucking months_ since he had served Naruto with the divorce papers, and he still had not received the finalized documents. They had finalized the financial matters. And that had been just _wonderful_ , with Gaara showing up by himself saying Naruto was too fucking busy to bother to come. And then thrown Sasuke's money back in his face. _Again_. So the business matters were settled, their bank accounts and assets separated. But the divorce was still not final.

It didn't help that Naruto had retained Gaara of all people to represent him. Gaara had proven that he was still completely impossible to intimidate on any level. The man just raised a hairless eyebrow at the most extreme death glares or threats that Sasuke threw his way. Even when Sasuke had barged into Gaara's office and completely exploded _demanding_ to meet with Naruto to finalize the divorce settlements, Gaara had just told him that public intoxication was against the law, and if he appeared in his office in such a condition again he would have Sasuke arrested. Sasuke hadn't been drunk. Not really. The cold fury that the redhead had shown him had seemed strange. Lawyers shouldn't be that emotionally invested in their cases, even if they were representing their friends. He didn't understand it.

And where the hell had Naruto disappeared to anyway? He wasn't anywhere. Sasuke had made a point to go to all the public places they had frequented together. He would go to the clubs, the restaurants, the gym. And if he didn't bring a date with him, he made damn sure he left with one before the night was over. The tabloids had a field day with pictures of him with his various lovers and his very overt (and often intoxicated) displays of affection. And dammit, he wanted to see Naruto's reaction. He wanted to see Naruto hurting. Or at least humiliated. _Something._ It wasn't that he missed the blond, missed just breathing the same air and existing in the same place. Of course not. He simply wanted to see that his plan to make the man suffer was working. Instead, it was as though Naruto had just walked out of their house and into another dimension. None of their friends knew where he was (or at least they claimed not to know... Sasuke still wasn't sure he believed them). Sasuke had even hired someone to try to track him down, but the man had come up empty. Gaara had full access to Naruto's financial accounts, and was evidently sending his friend money through his own channels. There were no travel records, no financial trails, no e-mail or phone records. When Sasuke had tried to access Gaara's activities to trace Naruto that way, he had found himself buried under a stack of legal injunctions and restraining orders that had left Shikamaru drowning in paper for the past month. _Fucking Gaara._

He wasn't trying to find Naruto for himself. Definitely not. It was their _business_ that was suffering. They were still riding out some of the business development ideas that Naruto had set in motion before he had left, but there was nothing new in the pipeline. Naruto had been the creative force for the company, always coming up with the new ideas to try and knowing just how to market them. Everything was falling apart. Sasuke reeled. He had wanted Naruto out of his personal life. But not out of his entire existence. In Sasuke's fantasy, Naruto would be on the sidelines, pining for him and regretting his mistake. He wouldn't take him back, of course. But Naruto would still be there. He just couldn't imagine a world where Naruto wasn't near him, in some way, even if it was as an enemy. He couldn't just be _gone._

Sasuke left the office early. There was no point in pretending that he was going to get more work done today. After two months of one night stands with both women and men, Sasuke had come to the realization that it didn't matter what the gender was of the person he was fucking. He had thought at least the casual sex would fill the void of physical contact that Naruto had left. Naruto had always been a very affectionate person, even outside of sex, and the small touches and hugs Naruto had 'forced' on Sasuke all the time had made Sasuke feel human. He had never admitted it, but in a way they had been even more important to him than sex. And he missed the contact now. But he had no desire to show such a weakness to his friends or colleagues. No desire to let someone else get emotionally close enough to fill that void and potentially hurt him again. So he had sought contact out with strangers instead. But none of it worked. They were all the same. He had always hated his fangirls, who knew nothing about who he really was but liked him only for his looks, image and money. Any hint of 'bad behavior' on his part was overlooked or swept away, its existence ignored. Because why try to understand the faults of a fantasy? They had no interest in who he really was.

The only one who had taken the time to break through his walls and understand who he was at his core was Naruto. And Naruto had not ignored Sasuke's faults. A small smile ghosted across his lips as he recalled the number of times Naruto had outright tackled him after he had said something condescending or cruel. No, Naruto had not overlooked his faults. But he had taken the time to understand them, accept them, and even help him reduce them, to a certain extent. When he had had sex with Naruto, he knew that Naruto was thinking of _him,_ of all of him. Accepting him with all his faults, not just what he looked like or how much money he had. Naruto had embraced Sasuke as a person, the light and the dark sides of him. At least, that is what he had thought until three months ago. But everyone else was just fucking an image, an idea, not him as a person. And Sasuke was tired of that. It just made him feel worse, and more alone. He'd given up going out to the clubs, and had just kept his home bar stocked instead. At least alcohol dulled his brain enough that he didn't keep obsessing about it. At least that was what he told himself.

. . . . .

"No." He picked up the bottle of bourbon and threw it across the room, watching it smash against the wall of his study and the red liquid splash over the floor.

_This isn't how things are supposed to be. I need to hurt him. I need to SEE him suffer. I can't be the only one feeling like this. He can't just disappear and start over. He can't just be... gone._

It was late. He was drunk. But there was only one place he could think to go. And he knew that even though it was past visiting hours, they would let him in. He called his driver.

. . . .

Sasuke laid his head on the hospital bed where his brother rested, unmoving. It had been two years since the car accident that had put Itachi into a coma. And every week, Naruto had come with him to visit him in the hospital. He had never realized how much that support had meant to him, feeling Naruto's silent strength and love for him while he grieved for the brother he idolized and missed. Sasuke had no one now. The only two people who had meant anything to him in this world had left him alone. And he was drowning. He felt wetness on the blanket, and realized it was from his own tears.

" _Itachi_ ," Sasuke whispered brokenly. "Please wake up." His throat closed up. He hadn't cried since his parent's death more than a decade ago. Hadn't needed his big brother so desperately since then. "I need you, Nii-san." He clutched his brother's limp hand. He didn't notice when he fell asleep, or when a nurse came in an hour later and draped a blanket over his shoulders. The rest of the world might view the Uchihas as cold, ruthless, and arrogant, but the doctors and nurses who worked in the wing where Itachi was cared for had seen the love and devotion that the younger brother had for the older one. And while they were puzzled by what they saw in the papers, they knew that it was not the whole truth in the matter.

-xXx- The wreckage of Naruto - xXx-

Naruto smiled wanly at Gaara, seeing the man's worry and anger, but not having the strength to hide his emotions better to prevent it. He had just left the house he had shared with his husband, and knew he would never go back inside again. He was emotionally exhausted. He needed to get out of sight of everyone so he could fall apart in private. He had turned over the divorce papers and all his financial and business statements to Gaara, knowing the man would know what to do. He gave him the address and phone number of his godfather's place, and asked him to give him a call when he got the paperwork figured out. Gaara had not been happy when Naruto had told him he just wanted to get out of the finances what he had either put in or earned. There had been no prenuptial agreement, so Naruto knew he could take Sasuke for a hell of a lot more than that, but he had no interest in it. Gaara clearly thought Naruto should rake Sasuke over the coals, but Naruto had just shook his head sadly and said that he didn't want to. Gaara had growled something about 'idealistic blond children', but there had been no heat in it.

Naruto had hugged him (he was probably the only person on the planet other than Gaara's wife who would dare do such a thing), then boarded the plane to Athens. He just needed to get out of here, away from Sasuke. He swore he would never let that person see how much he had hurt him. He would never, ever leave himself open to this kind of pain again. Jiraya moved around a lot, so Sasuke would have no way of knowing he was currently in Greece, if he even thought to look for him. There would be no one there to connect them. Naruto could rebuild himself. Once he was ready.

When he landed in Athens, it was a surreally sunny day, setting the buildings and greenery around him ablaze in color. Naruto got into a cab, feeling strangely detached and disconnected to this vibrant world around him. His head felt heavy, and his body ached. He tried to remember if he ate on the plane, but couldn't. He didn't feel hungry, so he supposed that was ok. The trip to his godfather's villa was more than an hour, but he wasn't aware of the time passing. He simply stared out the window in silence, thinking of nothing.

Jiraya walked out of the front door to greet Naruto as the cab pulled up. He stopped in shock as he took in the appearance of his godson. The usually bright blue eyes were dull and hooded. There were dark circles under his eyes, and his shoulders were hunched. Naruto tried to greet his godfather with his usual enthusiasm, but knew it failed miserably. He avoided the man's concerned gaze, and just said he was feeling jet-lagged from his trip and needed to rest. Jiraya took him to his room and promised lunch would be ready in an hour. Naruto nodded absently, and mechanically unpacked his clothes into the small dresser in the room, showered, and climbed into bed.

. . . .

Naruto vaguely was aware of time passing, but he didn't really know how much time. Jiraya would sometimes come in to try to talk to him. Sometimes a random, scantily clad girl would materialize in his bedroom (courtesy of his pervy godfather). Naruto would just look at them, and tell them he was tired and just needed to rest a bit more. Was he eating? He wasn't sure. Was he bathing? Not so much. But his body just seemed so tired. He knew that it had been too much time to still be jet-lag. But every time he tried to face what it really was, his consciousness would crawl back into the cave of sleep and hide. There. He'd said it. At least to himself. He was hiding. But he wasn't ready to deal with what he was hiding from yet. He needed more time.

. . . . . .

How much time had passed? Someone was in the room with him. Gaara? When had he come? The light hurt his eyes.

Gaara's eyes widened in shock when he saw his friend. It looked like he had lost at least twenty pounds. His usually golden skin was pale and drawn, and there were deep shadows under his eyes, as though he were not sleeping.

"Naruto." Gaara waited for the dull blue eyes to focus on him.

"Gaara. What are you doing here?"

"You haven't been returning any of my calls. It's been three weeks. I decided to come and see if you were still alive." It was meant to be a bit of a joke, but Gaara realized it actually wasn't. He felt fear and anger form a cold knot in his stomach. Fear for the well being of his friend, and anger for the bastard who had put him in this condition.

"Three weeks? I thought... I thought it had been only a couple of days. Sorry..." Naruto tried to smile. "I guess that without having to be at work, I kind of lost track of the days."

They both knew that was a lie.

"Naruto, you need to sign some of these papers. They can hold us in contempt of court if we refuse to sign."

Naruto nodded numbly, and took the stack of papers that Gaara handed him. He flipped through, skimming them, and signing where he needed to, then handed them back to Gaara. The smaller man looked through, then paused at the final pages.

"You didn't sign the final divorce consent. You signed all the financial papers. But you have to sign the final divorce document."

Naruto just turned his head to the side. "I'm tired. Get the financial settlement done. That's the most important anyway."

Gaara sighed. He knew he couldn't force Naruto to do this, not because Naruto would dig his heels in, but because he might break.

Gaara pulled out his phone, and called his office. "Set up a meeting with Nara Shikamaru regarding the final negotiation of the divorce financial settlement when I get back."

Naruto had closed his eyes. Gaara wasn't sure if his friend was actually sleeping or just shutting out the reality of the papers he had just signed. Gaara still had his phone in his hand, and quickly took a photo of Naruto. While Sasuke would probably be gleeful at seeing the damage he had wrought, Gaara had a feeling that Shikamaru would be swayed by it. And if it could help keep his friend from being slapped with a contempt charge, then it was worth trying.

. . . . .

"I am not sure I fully understand," Shikamaru was saying. "You are telling me that Naruto rejected our original settlement agreement because he wants _less_?"

Gaara scowled, clearly not happy with that. But it was his job to follow through on his client's wishes, as much as he would much prefer to drive a legal steak knife through the heart of the black-haired bastard sitting silently in front of him.

"That's right. Naruto was quite clear that he wanted only his original investment, and his share of the profits that have been generated by the company that he and Sasuke jointed created. He wanted no portion of the broader Uchiha fortune or business empire, and no portion of the jointly owned property other than what he had already collected as his personal affects," Gaara looked at both Shikamaru and Sasuke in turn. "I take it there are no objections to this revised set of settlement terms?"

Sasuke looked completely frozen. "Why isn't he here himself?"

It took all of Gaara's willpower to not punch Sasuke in the face. "He has more important matters to attend to. So he has delegated this task to me."

He turned to Shikamaru, missing the raw pain that flashed across Sasuke's face at his words. "I will leave these documents for you to review. When they are signed, you can file them directly with the court and send me a copy."

Sasuke stood stiffly, and left the room.

Shikamaru flipped through them one last time. "Gaara... I don't see the final agreement to the divorce included here."

Gaara looked after where Sasuke had exited, then turned to face Shikamaru. "He didn't sign it."

Shikamaru sighed. "Sasuke will file contempt of court charges against him if he doesn't file."

"What if there were medical reasons for the delay?"

Shikamaru looked at Gaara, anxiety creeping into his stomach. "Is Naruto ok?"

Gaara answered the question the same as he had the last time that Shikamaru had asked it, but this time he pulled out his phone and showed the man the photo he had taken. "No. He is really not ok."

Shikamaru put his head in his hands, shaken more than he cared to admit at the photo of his friend. He was hardly recognizable. "Oh, god. Where is he? Can I see him?"

Gaara shook his head. "He doesn't want anyone to know where he is. He would be furious with me if he knew I had shown you this."

"Then why did you?" Shikamaru asked, though he already knew the answer.

Gaara just looked at him, not even deigning to answer the question. "Do what you can to stall Sasuke. But just so you know, if Naruto doesn't get better, I will come after Sasuke. And I won't necessarily stick to legal channels. Naruto might be a nice guy. But I'm not."

Shikamaru nodded mutely. He had never felt so morally conflicted in his entire legal career. He wondered if he was going to end up quitting.

. . . . .

There was a soft, steady beeping that Naruto didn't recognize. What was that sound? He felt so tired. And the bed felt strange. Where was he? Naruto opened his eyes. He took in the white walls, white sheets, and metal rails on his bed, along with the IV taped to his left arm and the bag of clear liquid attached to it through the small plastic tube.

_Hospital?_ He thought a little groggily. Why was he here? A woman with short brown hair and a white medical jacket came in.

"Mr. Uzumaki? I'm Dr. Shizune. How are you feeling?"

"I'm... fine I guess. Why am I here?"

"You don't remember? You overdosed on sleeping pills." She paused, clearly waiting for a reaction.

"Overdose? I just... took a few to get some sleep. A friend brought them over."

"You took 10. And your friend brought you to the hospital and dropped you off, though he didn't stay to fill out any of the paperwork. But he definitely saved your life."

Naruto thought about that. Jiraya had been leaving on some business trip. He vaguely remembered the young man that had come to his room. Evidently his godfather had thought that if female hookers didn't work, he would try male hookers. Naruto had told the guy to leave, that he needed to rest. The man had said Naruto could use his sleep medication, since he also suffered from insomnia. So Naruto had taken some. 10? He didn't think so, but maybe. He really couldn't remember.

"Do you know what day it is?" Shizune continued.

Naruto shook his head, he had no idea. Shizune handed him a newspaper. And he was shocked to see the date. It had been more than two months since he had left Japan.

"How long have I been in the hospital?"

"Two days. It was close for the first 24 hours, but you pulled through. We were not able to contact the man whose house you were staying at, but we found contact information for someone named Sabaku Gaara on your phone, and he said he was your attorney and would handle things. Your body is considerably weakened by starvation. You will be need to undergo phych evaluations and will probably not be able to leave the hospital for several weeks. Mr Sabaku was here earlier this morning, and had all medical records and reports sealed. He evidently was very concerned that nothing leak out about this to the press. He terrified the staff, then stormed out saying he had some business to take care of back in Japan as soon as he was satisfied that you were out of immediate danger of dying."

He had almost died? Naruto waited for some sort of reaction to that information to surface inside him. It was accidental. If he had really wanted to kill himself, he would do something much more foolproof than pills. Did he want to kill himself? He thought about it for a while. No... not really. But the thing that really surprised him was how apathetic he was about it all. He had almost died. And he really didn't care.

Did he want Sasuke back that badly that he couldn't live without him? He realized slowly that the question actually needed to be taken into two parts. Did he want Sasuke back? If Sasuke walked through the door of Naruto's hospital room right now and begged for forgiveness, would Naruto take him back? He fantasized for a minute about the sight of Sasuke groveling, but in the end he had no real interest in that. The answer was no, he didn't want him back. Sasuke had apparently gotten tired of him and moved on. While it hurt, that in and of itself was not the unforgivable part. People changed. Love faded. It happened. Part of Naruto had always expected it to end at some point. What Sasuke had said was true... what did Naruto really bring to the relationship? It had always been unequal. No, Naruto didn't blame Sasuke for tiring of him, as much as it had hurt.

The part that had been truly unforgivable had been the way in which he had done it. While Sasuke could be cold, and even cruel at times, it was usually for a reason. The people that Sasuke had been the worst to generally deserved it. Sasuke wasn't _mean_ , he was _hard_. And there was a big difference between the two in Naruto's mind. Naruto had always believed that at his heart, Sasuke was a good person protected by a hard shell. And that core of goodness was what made piercing through that shell worthwhile.

But a good person would not have done what Sasuke had done to him. He would have found a way to let Naruto down gently, or at least tried. It still would have crushed him. But it would have at least showed that Sasuke had enough respect for him as a person, as a fucking _human being_ , to take the time and explain what had changed. But Sasuke hadn't done that. Hadn't cared beyond the end of his own attachments. Even their past friendship, which had been such a gigantic fixture in Naruto's life, had evidently not meant enough to Sasuke for him to spend any time talking with Naruto rather than just evicting him from his life via the most expedient path. And no matter how interesting or beautiful Sasuke was, no matter how amazing the sex, without basic trust and actual liking for a person there was no relationship as far as Naruto was concerned. Looks fade, and sex can be found pretty much anywhere, with much less pain.

So if it were really true that Naruto didn't want Sasuke back (and his brain did keep tripping on that seemingly unbelievable conclusion), then the real question he had to answer was whether there enough of 'just Naruto' that would make living and battling out of this hell of depression worth it. At some point in most people's lives, they hit a spot so low that this question comes up. And of course, there is no real answer. It all comes down to the resilience of the human spirit that dwells in that particular being as to how the answer will come.

And whatever else Naruto had lacked in his life, he had always had an indomitable spirit. Slowly, he felt it flicker back to life inside him. He was not just going to lay down and die because his lover had left him. He almost laughed at how stupid that thought even was, but he realized how close he had come to actually doing it. But that was over now. He didn't know if he could truly separate his past identity from Sasuke. The core of who he had been was just too inextricably tied to his lover. While it felt like half of who he was had been ripped away, he knew that he would just have to build out the rest of himself and become whole again. Even if it meant starting from scratch - he would recover from this. On his own. He would start over.

-xXx-

_to be continued_ ( **please comment** and let me know what you think... I know it is very angsty. But it starts to get better in the next chapter. And Naruto and Sasuke meet again.)


	3. Resurrected

-xXx-

Shikamaru entered Gaara's office, and closed the door. "What happened?"

Gaara had been throwing nuisance lawsuits and injunctions at Sasuke right and left for the past three months. In retaliation, Sasuke had decided to try to force Naruto to sell his share of their company, but Gaara had been stonewalling, refusing to even broach the topic with Naruto and threatening to escalate matters. Even for Gaara, it had seemed overkill, and Shikamaru knew that something must have happened to trigger this overprotective stance Gaara was taking.

Gaara glared at Shikamaru, then tossed the man a file. Shikamaru opened it up, and blanched. It was Naruto's medical report from the hospital. "Naruto... overdosed on sleeping pills?" It went against everything that Shikamaru thought he knew about his friend. It was completely inconceivable. He would have been much less surprised if Sasuke had been the one to do this. Naruto had always seemed... so solid and stable. No matter what life had thrown his way, and it had thrown absolutely truckloads of shit at the man, Naruto had always seemed to be able to bounce back. He read on, seeing the report of severe weight loss and potential liver damage. "Oh my god."

Gaara was seething. "I have been toying with various ways of destroying Sasuke, but he seems to be doing a pretty good job of that on his own between drinking himself to death and being unable to focus on his company long enough to retain a suitable replacement for Naruto and keep the company on pace." There was a question buried in that statement that Shikamaru addressed.

"I still don't know why Sasuke ended things, and Sasuke has refused to talk about it with anyone. But I know that he is miserable. I know that he is hurting. And I know that he is not even looking for another relationship anymore."

Gaara nodded. He didn't look exactly appeased, but he also didn't look as close to homicide as he had earlier. "Make him back off Naruto. Distract him, drug him, lie to him, I don't fucking care. I will leave him alone, if he will do the same. But in the end, I am on Naruto's side. And if he hurts Naruto again, I won't be sympathetic to whatever personal angst Sasuke is inflicting on himself in the process."

Shikamaru accepted the olive branch, and the warning. Despite what some people thought, Gaara was not sadistic. He was loyal, and he didn't pull his punches in defense of things or people he cared about. But he also didn't kick people when they were down. Shikamaru sighed, feeling annoyed with himself for getting pulled into this mess. Why was he working with someone as high maintenance as Sasuke again? Oh, right. Childhood friends. There must be easier jobs out there. Or easier friends. Too bad he was too loyal to ever consider looking for either.

-xXx-

The doctor had told Naruto he needed to stay in the hospital for at least two weeks. Naruto stayed two days. He waited until the doctor confirmed his vitals were stable, and there was no permanent liver damage due to his rapid weight loss. He refused the psychiatric evaluation, and the robust return of his appetite and renewed interest in his personal hygiene convinced the reluctant doctor to discharge him. Either that or it was just the fact that Naruto had simply pulled out the IV, dressed in his clothes, and headed to the nurses station to have the doctor paged before leaving the hospital.

It had been three months since his marriage had ended, and Naruto had decided it was time to start putting the pieces back together instead of just laying in the rubble. He needed his own space to accomplish this, so despite Jiraya's extreme misgivings, Naruto packed up his suitcase, rented a car, and drove to Andalusia. There was something about the atmosphere there, with the different cultural influences and vibrancy that resonated with Naruto's soul. He needed this. He rented a small apartment near the heart of town, and spent his days and evenings exploring the city mostly on foot. He had always been good with languages, and Spanish was similar enough to the English and Italian that he had already studied that he found himself picking it up quickly. There is nothing like total immersion to learn a language, after all.

The move had exhausted him, though. He was still physically very weak. He had always taken pride in his body and it pained him to see the reflection that looked back from the mirror. He was gaunt and pale. He hardly could reconcile the person he saw with the mental image he had of himself. He needed to find something that he could start slowly and build over time as he regained his strength. On his third day in his new home, he was walking back from the market with a few groceries when he noticed a small, slightly run-down looking building with a wooden sign over the door saying 'Kung Fu'. He pushed the door open, and went inside. The building had just one room, with wooden floors, punching bags in each corner, and boards with leather stretched across mounted on the wall. An old man, who appeared quite small, was going through an intricate series of motions in the middle of the room. Familiar with martial arts etiquette, Naruto simply knelt down into seiza inside the entrance and waited quietly for the man to finish and acknowledge him. He came over and looked down at Naruto with curiously yellowish eyes, then motioned for Naruto to stand. Naruto bowed respectfully, then stood up.

"I saw this place walking back from the market," Naruto gestured to the bag sitting on the floor next to him. "I was hoping to join your dojo. Are you taking new students?"

The man looked Naruto directly in his eyes, then took in his pale and wasted form. "You were hurt."

Naruto fidgeted uncomfortably. He knew he looked pretty rough. "I was... sick for a few months. But I am recovering now. And I would like to study under you, and recover my strength, Sifu."

The old man smiled slightly. His eyes seemed eerily knowing, as though he could see directly into Naruto's heart and mind. "You were hurt, and you made yourself sick and damaged your body. But you have a good heart, and a strong spirit. I will help you recover. Come. Have some tea with me, and we will meditate. When you are slightly stronger, I will train your body. But first, let's start with training and focusing your mind. That has been the most damaged, and the body will not fully heal until the mind will allow it to. I am Sifu Shima.* We study primarily Hidden Toad style, though there are some nontraditional techniques that we weave in at times. What is your name?"

"Naruto," he said simply, a bit taken aback by the man's statement. But he knew the man was right, and was glad for whatever twist of fate had made him choose this street to walk on that day.

"Welcome, to-dai Naruto," the man smiled gently at him.

And true to his welcome, Shima took him under his wing at the dojo. There were classes every day and open gym time most evenings. Naruto threw himself into this, finding peace in the discipline and focus required. He spent hours talking to Sifu Shima about the philosophy of the style, and continued learning meditation from him. His favorite sessions would be the afternoons where they would spend hours going through the forms, but moving so slowly that if someone had looked into the room the motion was imperceptible. He found the combination of the physical challenge of holding a stance for that amount of time combined with the mental focus on perfecting every detail of the position to be calming to both body and mind. He felt the sweat purging the toxins of stress and depression from his body, and took great pleasure in washing them away after a tough session.

He was also enjoying living in a completely new city, away from anyone who knew his past. It was liberating to be in a place where he knew literally no one. He could be whoever he wanted here. He could completely redefine himself with no one forcing him into being "like he'd always been." So many of his friends and experiences where shaded with Sasuke.

So much of who he was was based on his past with Sasuke. With no parents or family to anchor him, and a guardian who was absent more than not, Sasuke had been the one constant from grade school on. They had been rivals at first, which had evolved into brothers, then lovers. Things that Sasuke had liked, Naruto had liked. Not because Naruto was weak willed or had no opinions on his own, but rather because he had taken honest joy and pleasure in the happiness of his friend and lover. He had been his first friend, his first best friend, his first kiss, his first lover, his first business partner, his first spouse. He had bought his first house with him. So many of the biggest moments that define a person's life were tied to this person that Naruto had to now separate himself from. But he had made up his mind to get through this. And he never quit once he had decided to do something.

So now he had to remove those deeply embedded shards of attachment from every facet of his being, or risk being slowly cut to shreds by them. And there were definitely days where he bled. Memories of Sasuke would appear out of nowhere of times when they had been happy - and their appearance would almost crush him. Would he ever be that happy again? Maybe not. But still, he would not regret it. After all, how many people in life were truly as happy as he had been with Sasuke? People talked about the idea of soul mates and 'happily ever after', but he hadn't really seen many examples of it besides what he thought he had found with Sasuke. And if the rest of the world's population was able to have sufficiently fulfilling lives without that kind of insane, searing happiness, then so could he. It hadn't lasted, and maybe it hadn't been as real as he thought, but that didn't change the experiences he'd had.

Several times he almost tripped into the seductive trap of imagining building himself into someone that Sasuke would fall back in love with, but he knew that was just a shallow fantasy. After all, the Sasuke that he had been in love with had turned out not to be the reality anyway. And now that he knew that, there really was no going back. How pathetic would it be to spend so much time chasing after an illusion of a person, anyway? Naruto was stronger than that. He was still not able to fully reconcile the Sasuke he thought he had known all his life with the Sasuke who had thrown him away so coldly. But it didn't matter if it was that Sasuke had changed over time, or that Naruto had never known him as well as the though he had in the first place. There was no point in dwelling on a mystery that would only bring pain and prolong closure. He needed to focus on himself, and let Sasuke go.

He still had not signed the final divorce agreement, and that bothered him. Gaara had finally stopped asking him about it, but Naruto knew that the man was concerned. Gaara must have found some heavy leverage or legal maneuvering to keep Sasuke from slapping him with a contempt of court charge. And Naruto knew he would never get closure if he didn't cut this final cord. If he was so ready to move on, why was he holding back? Why couldn't he just sign the fucking paper? He couldn't or wouldn't answer that question to himself. He just kept waiting to be notified that somehow Sasuke had managed to make it final without his signature. Then he could walk away knowing there was nothing more to be done.

But he already knew it was fully over... he had seen the news. Googling what was going on back home had been a bad idea, he supposed, even if it had started as just curiosity to see what his company was doing. Images of Sasuke and various lovers had popped up. And Naruto had felt the anguish and jealousy surge over him at the stories of drunken one night stands, and rumors of more serious hidden relationships. But when Naruto had really looked at some of the photos, he had recognized the expression in Sasuke's eyes... and it was misery and loneliness, not lust or glee. Why did Sasuke do this if it made him unhappy? Was he still trying to hurt Naruto? That didn't make sense if he were really just bored with him, like he had claimed. Sasuke would never trouble himself over someone he didn't care about. It ate at Naruto. He knew he had always been the only one to reach Sasuke, and have him open up. Except for Itachi. Naruto sighed. If Sasuke were hurting and alone, it was his own fucking fault. Sasuke was going to have to clean up his own mess, just like Naruto was doing. It had been Sasuke's choice, after all. Naruto had tried. Sasuke clearly was not trying to mend the relationship. He was just trying to rub Naruto's nose in its demise, for whatever reason. _Fuck him. I won't care anymore about how he feels, or whether he is ok._ He tried to stick to that.

Naruto poured his pain and confusion and loneliness into his paintings. He knew that the images he created disturbed his godfather when he came to visit, but they were his catharsis, his outlet for all the confusing feelings and emotional turmoil he felt. They soaked out his feelings of anger, darkness, longing and weakness.

And he focused on himself. Uzumaki Naruto. What did he like? What did he want to do with his life, and how did he want to live it now that he no longer needed to answer to anyone else? The earnings that he received from his business enterprise made him financially independent for a very long time, so he didn't need to find a job right away. He knew he would go back to some sort of work eventually... he didn't like idleness. It made him feel useless. But for now, that would have to wait. He wasn't over-the-top wealthy the way Sasuke was, but he had never really been comfortable with that lifestyle anyway, if he was really truthful with himself. He hated the pretention of the people that lived in that world, and the slick facades that everyone wore that merely covered up their greed and manipulations. He had accepted it because as long as he had been with Sasuke, it didn't really matter. For all his money, Sasuke had never been like that. But Sasuke was gone and Naruto could live as he chose - and he chose simplicity over ostentation any day.

Food was another adventure for Naruto. Sasuke had grown up on gourmet, and since they had had a chef, that had become what Naruto had gotten used to eating. Most of Naruto's childhood had revolved around meals of ramen, which was a food that felt like an actual meal, but avoided the feeling of loneliness that cooking a real meal for just one person entailed. When he was older, he had enjoyed ramen and the nostalgia of remembered loneliness that had been overcome, the food a sensory reminder of his survival and perseverance through a childhood that would have crushed the spirit of someone weaker. It was something that had reminded him of who he was and where he had come from. But now, the comfort of that food was gone. Because he was alone again.

So he found himself having uncertain feelings about his old standby, despite being a bit of a cliché in the kitchen in terms of male cooking abilities. He wanted to be a person who found enough value in his own self that it was worth preparing a real fucking meal. So he experimented with different cuisines and discovered that he liked spicy. Any form of spicy. Thai, Indian, Malaysian, Mexican... it was all good. And he took pleasure in discovering a new dish that he liked in a restaurant and then going home and researching and trying to create an even better version for himself. And after the first month or so, he managed to do it without setting anything on fire. Things were looking up.

He spent evenings exploring the nightlife, and different types of music. He enjoyed the bars and clubs that had live music, and interesting people. He discovered that he liked Jazz, metal, Reggaeton, Goth, and Flamenco guitar. And he didn't have to justify to anyone why he had Coltrane, Shinedown, Daddy Yankee, the Cure, and Ottmar Liebert on his iPod together. But though he spent many nights in bars and nightclubs, he declined any offers for 'at home' company from the women or men that approached him, and he avoided the dance clubs, where people just went for a quick hook-up. He knew he was nowhere near strong enough to take on a relationship right now, and he had no interest in casual, anonymous sex. It just wasn't his style. He needed to get himself sorted out first, then worry about whether he would ever have any interest in trying to add another person on that level into his life. The next relationship he had, if he had one, would be one of equals. He would not repeat the mistake he had made with Sasuke. But if it were going to be equal, he needed to be strong and centered again.

He also admitted that a large part of the reason he was avoiding physical intimacy was because it brought back too many memories of Sasuke. The one downside of having a physically perfect person be your first sexual partner was that it was pretty much bound to be all downhill from there. And he didn't want to think about a comparison, or feel like he was settling. So he would wait until he found someone he didn't have to 'settle' with. Someone who was nothing like Sasuke, so that there would be no comparison. But that was a long way down the road.

He felt his strength slowly returning. He spent time out walking the streets or taking a trip to the beach. He had always been a child of the sun, feeling the warmth and energy soak into his soul. He saw a bunch of kids playing soccer in an alley by his apartment. One of them launched a ball and caught another in the ass, and a scuffle ensued followed by trash talking at a hyperbolic level that only a group of 10-year-olds can really deliver on. He laughed out loud for the first time in almost a year. And he knew it was going to be ok.

. . . . .

He had been living in his apartment for almost two years. He had settled back into life, and felt physically and emotionally strong again. He was ready to take the next step and get back to work. Maybe even find a relationship, though he had not met anyone who caught his eye.

He was coming home from a concert one night when he saw a tattoo parlor. And it got him thinking. He wanted to reclaim his body as his own, and somehow mark it as different from the one that had been shared for so long with Sasuke. So that when he was finally ready to take a lover, there would be a piece of himself that had not been seen by anyone else. An image sprang in his mind, coming from the many discussions he had had with Sifu Shima around the center of a person's _chi_ being in the belly... the center of energy and strength. The next day, he had the tattoo done. And for the first time in almost two years, he felt the owner of his own sexuality again. Not just Sasuke's cast-off lover.

A knock on his door surprised him. There were only two people that knew his address. He opened the door, and saw Jiraya standing there.

"You going to just stare, or let your old godfather in out of the sun?"

Naruto grinned and clapped his hand on the older man's shoulder, pulling him inside. "What - forgot how to use a phone? What brings you here?"

"I received an offer from an old student of mine." Jiraya had held several positions over the years teaching creative writing at various colleges. Somehow, they always ended with him leaving under the cloud of scandal. Surprise, surprise.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "If you are going to tell me some perverted story about some schoolgirl going down on you, I REALLY don't want to hear it."

"Brat," Jiraya said, but his eyes were dancing and Naruto guessed that the scene he had just joked about had probably played out at some point in the man's past. Far past the point of being able to be shocked about such things, Naruto just shrugged and waited for his godfather to continue.

"Actually, it is an offer for you, not me." Naruto sighed and opened his mouth to protest, but Jiraya held up a hand to forestall him. "Not for sex. To show your paintings."

That stopped Naruto. "What?"

"His name is Yahiko. He runs a very well-known art gallery. I sent him some photos of your paintings, and he wants to exhibit them. He said that he could also get you an adjunct position as an art teacher at a university he has connections with, or he could get you involved with artistic direction for a production company that shoots videos, depending on your interests. He was quite taken with your work."

Naruto thought about it for a bit, feeling a little queasy. His paintings were intensely personal. He had poured the worst emotions of his life into them. Put them on display? He wasn't sure. "Is his gallery in Andalusia?"

"No. It's in Japan. Naruto, it has been two years. It's time you went home. You can't hide forever. Go back. Make a new life for yourself, but don't keep hiding from your old life. Pick up the parts of it that you still want, and shed the rest. You had friends other than Sasuke. Good friends, who miss you. And I am sure you have missed them as well."

Naruto thought about it, ignoring the wave of panic that being back in the same country as Sasuke evoked. Was he still that weak? That he couldn't even live in the same fucking _country_? What had he spent the past two years doing, then? No, Jiraya was right. It was time. He was ready. He was going back home. And he would finally sign the divorce papers and sell his part of the business he had built with Sasuke. He'd cut the final cord.

-xXx-

Sasuke woke up. It was dark, and he was on the couch of his study. What had woken him? He realized his cell was going off. He looked at the number, and yanked the phone open, his heart in his throat.

_"Uchiha Sasuke?"_

"Yes, this is Uchiha Sasuke. Is this Dr. Tsunade?"

_"Yes. I am calling because-"_

"Is everything alright? Has Itachi's condition changed?" Sasuke was already running to the hall, pulling on his shoes and looking for his keys.

_"Yes, sir. I am calling to let you know that your brother has woken up. His condition is stable and he is alert and aware."_

Sasuke started his car, his hands shaking. "I'm on my way. Tell him I will be there in fifteen minutes. Please," his whispered hoarsely. "Please don't let him go back to sleep."

Sasuke sped through town, amazed that he didn't get pulled over for speeding or reckless driving. He ran in through the emergency entrance, knowing that the main doors would be locked at this time of night. Dr. Tsunade was waiting for him, and escorted him down to his brother's room. Where for the first time in more than three years, Sasuke saw the eyes open on the face he had looked up to his entire life.

"Nii-san," Sasuke's voice was thick with emotion, and he quickly crossed to the bed and embraced his brother, feeling how thin he had become from years of hospitalization. They talked for a bit, Sasuke explaining what had happened in the accident, and the doctor explaining Itachi's current medical condition.

"Where is Naruto? Is he on a business trip?"

Sasuke's face shuttered, and Itachi raised an eyebrow. "Let's talk about that later. For now, let's just focus on getting you out of here. Your house has been closed up for three years, so we'll need some time to get it ready for you to move back in. You can come stay with me for now in my apartment."

Itachi noticed that Sasuke had said "me" not "us", and also noticed he did not mention the house that he and Naruto had built together. He also had not missed the smell of alcohol on his brother's breath, nor the marks of dissipation on his face. Something had gone terribly wrong while he had been trapped in a coma. But he was going to get to the bottom of it. That's what big brothers were for.

. . . .

Itachi had been at Sasuke's penthouse for two days before he decided it was time to address the large technicolored elephant sitting in the room. They were sitting down at dinner. "So when are you going to tell me why you are living separately from Naruto, aren't wearing your wedding band, and your kitchen and office are stocked with more booze than a Las Vegas bar?"

Sasuke froze with a bite of food halfway to his mouth.

"I filed for divorce a year ago. Naruto doesn't live in the area anymore," Sasuke stated this casually, as though he were talking about the weather. But Itachi wasn't fooled.

"What happened?"

Sasuke put his fork down. There was no pretending that he was going to eat anymore. For all the people that had asked him, he had never answered this question. But refusing to answer Itachi was an entirely different matter. He knew this conversation was not likely to go they way he wanted it to. But that didn't mean that he wouldn't try. He fixed Itachi with his most formidable Uchiha 'back-the-fuck-off' glare. "We grew apart. It was time to end it, so I did."

Itachi looked at him for a moment in almost disbelief. "Of course. So that is why you are drinking yourself into a stupor almost every night, and spent the first two months after the breakup fucking anyone who was willing. Which, for you, is a considerably long list. And all this because you had 'grown apart'?" Itachi even used the finger quotations. Not a good sign.

"You've been catching up on old news, I see," Sasuke said, refusing to look away. He would _not_ be apologetic for what he had done. It was no ones business but his. And Naruto's.

And evidently his big brother's. "That's what Google was invented for, little brother. So are you going to tell me what happened, or would you rather I looked into it myself?"

Sasuke forced himself not to rub his temples in frustration. Part of him really wanted someone to talk to. He had prayed those first few months after the breakup that his brother would wake up so he would not have to face this alone. But time had passed, and the wound had started to close over. The memories of Naruto had faded a little, and he didn't wake up every night sweating and shaking, dreaming of him anymore. Now it was only once a week, sometimes less. He could go to work, and no longer expect to see Naruto walking out of a room, or coming into his office, or slammed up against his door...

Did he really want to re-open all those feelings and memories again? But looking at the black and foreboding eyes of his older brother, he realized that he wasn't going to have much say in the matter. It was just as Itachi had said. Either Sasuke could tell Itachi now and get it over with relatively quickly, or Itachi would dig it up on his own. And the digging would be painful, and protracted.

"Naruto slept with at least two other people while we were married. I found out, and I ended it. Abruptly."

Itachi blinked in abject disbelief. He had known Naruto almost as long as Sasuke. He found the notion of Naruto cheating on Sasuke almost inconceivable.

"And you found this out how?"

Sasuke kept his expression carefully blank. "I received photos of Naruto in bed - in _our_ bed - with two women. At the same time. Additionally, there were hotel records showing he had met these women separately on multiple occasions while he was on 'business trips'."

"There can be misunderstandings... photos taken out of context can appear to indicate something that isn't really happening."

"Maybe. But it's pretty hard to misinterpret Naruto naked in bed, with two women also without their clothes on, and one of the women's face in his crotch."

Ouch. Itachi took a breath. But it just couldn't be what it seemed. There had to be some explanation for this, and he was going to fucking find it. "Where did you get these photos and hotel records?"

"They were sent to me," Sasuke shifted uncomfortably. A dead giveaway. Clearly this was the weak link in the chain. It was the only evidence that Itachi had that Sasuke had some doubts about the information.

"Sent to you... anonymously? You ended a marriage with a man you had known and loved for more than a decade for a pack of anonymous information? Did you even verify it? Have you heard of Photoshop?" Itachi's disbelief at his brother's stupidity was almost overwhelming. How could Sasuke have been so easily manipulated? It had always been a weakness that Sasuke had when he was younger, especially after their parents' deaths. But he had really not thought that anything could turn him from Naruto. Naruto was his anchor. How had this all happened?

"Do you think I am an idiot? Of course I verified it. I had the photos professionally analyzed. They were stills from a video, and they could tell by the patterns in the background static that there was no pixel manipulation, no alteration of any kind. They were real. And I went to the hotels myself. They remembered Naruto... it's pretty hard to forget someone who looks like him. And they remembered the women he was with at the bar or at dinner. He was there. With them. Without me. And he never mentioned those meetings to me at the time. Naruto - who talks about _everything_." The bitterness of betrayal was dripping from his words. His hands were shaking, so he clenched him into fists to make it stop. This was exactly why he had never told anyone about this. He didn't want to remember the way he felt when he found out. He didn't want to think about this anymore. The two days Naruto claimed to be in the hospital, Sasuke had been visiting the hotels and having the photos examined, praying that it would turn out to be some trick, something that could be explained away. He didn't want to remember the sinking feeling in his stomach when everything turned out to be real. He stalked over to the kitchen and poured himself a large glass of vodka from the freezer. Itachi had already noticed the alcohol. There was really no point in hiding it. Itachi's eyes narrowed as he watched his brother, but he didn't comment.

"Did you talk to him about it?" But of course Itachi already knew the answer to this. He knew his brother well enough to know he would have gone into self-protection mode, just as he had done when he had found out about their parents' deaths. He would have shut down and withdrawn to try to minimize the emotional damage. _Fuck_.

Sasuke laughed. It was a horrible, hollow sound. "I told him I had caught him, and he didn't deny it, or even question what I was talking about." Sasuke thought of that night at their house, their last night together. He had hoped that Naruto would somehow deny it when he had accused him of wanting to have sex with other people in their bed, that he had been caught. But Naruto had just ignored the accusation and thrown it back at him. "But I didn't bother showing him the photos as well. I mean, really, what was he going to say? 'Oops, we all tripped and somehow our clothes all fell off when we landed on the bed and then her mouth accidentally connected with my dick?' I saw the photos. There's really not much room for interpretation there. I didn't need the blow-by-blow of how long it had been going on or how many others there were. It was over. There was _nothing_ to discuss," Sasuke's voice was sneering and bitter, but he could see the underlying pain and loneliness. It made Itachi bleed for him. He felt a cold anger and sense of purpose wash over him. Well, he needed motivation to get through the next months of physical therapy to get his strength back. And he had fucking found it. No one messed with his brother.

. . . .

The next day, while Sasuke was at work, Shikamaru found himself summoned to the Uchihas' apartment. Itachi was seated at the kitchen table, having just returned from his first session of physical therapy for the day. His body might be weak, but his mind was focused as ever. "I want you to tell me everything you know about what happened between Naruto and Sasuke, and where Naruto is now."

Shikamaru swallowed nervously. Itachi was incredibly protective of his brother. And incredibly dangerous when angered. But Shikamaru had seen, as few others seemed to recognize, that Sasuke was destroying himself. If anyone could pull his friend out of his downward spiral, it was the man sitting before him.

"I don't know what caused the split. I can honestly say that Naruto didn't either. I haven't seen him in almost two years, since Sasuke put the divorce proceedings in motion -" Itachi's head snapped up at that deliberate choice of wording, and Shikamaru paused.

"You mean the divorce isn't final?"

"No. Naruto won't sign the papers. He retained Gaara -" Itachi's eyes narrowed at that news... this would make things much more difficult. "And Gaara has been throwing every trick in the book to prevent us from filing contempt of court charges or getting it pushed through without Naruto's signature."

Itachi looked at Shikamaru. He had always respected this man's intelligence, and knew that it would be next to impossible to outmaneuver him in the legal realm, even with someone as skilled and determined as Gaara. Unless Shikamaru was willingly going along.

"What aren't you telling me about Naruto." It wasn't a question.

Shikamaru hesitated only a second. No matter how intimidating Itachi was, there was no doubt that he would see the truth behind things where Sasuke was too blinded with hurt to be able to. Shikamaru described exactly how Sasuke had ended the relationship with Naruto, and Naruto's clear bewilderment and hurt. Itachi sighed, recognizing the trademark Uchiha ruthlessness in his brother's actions, but regretting it nonetheless. "Itachi, when Naruto left here he had a complete mental breakdown. He... ended up in a hospital and almost died. He had lost over fifty pounds by the end, and took an overdoes of sleeping pills." Itachi blinked, the mental image of the happy, energetic blond almost killing himself was something he could hardly get his mind around. Shikamaru nodded in acknowledgment and continued. "Gaara won't tell me where Naruto is, but I don't think he is in the country anymore. He hasn't made contact with any of his friends or business contacts since Sasuke threw him out of their house. Gaara says he has been recovering since then, but - he's in at least as bad of shape as Sasuke. Whatever Sasuke thinks Naruto did, he didn't."

A tension that had nested in Itachi's stomach uncurled slightly. He trusted Shikamaru's judgment. And his own. Whatever had happened, he was sure that Naruto didn't do this. It was always easier to take down an enemy that you didn't like. He wouldn't have to go after Naruto.

"Does Sasuke know?"

"No... Gaara only agreed to keep me informed if I promised not to tell Sasuke. He said he 'didn't want to give the bastard the satisfaction'," Shikamaru grimaced.

Itachi narrowed his eyes again, but didn't argue. He would feel the same way if roles were reversed. But it was painfully clear to Itachi that things were not what they appeared to be. He had to get his hands on those photos and hotel records. He wondered where Sasuke kept his safe. If only so much time hadn't passed. If only his brother hadn't done what he had. If only he hadn't been in a coma. So many wrong turns. Itachi sighed. The hard part would be to get Sasuke to acknowledge that he even had any interest in fixing things.

"Don't let Gaara finalize the divorce until we know what really happened," Itachi stated flatly. Shikamaru looked skeptical. What was it with these Uchihas thinking he could make Gaara dance to his tune? They were both insane. But he would try. And he knew that Gaara cared for Naruto. It's possible that he could be persuaded that this was the right thing.

"I'll try. But it might become necessary at some point for you to talk with him directly if Naruto gives in and signs the papers. Gaara backed off a bit when he saw what a mess Sasuke was becoming, but he still is going to do what is best for Naruto."

Itachi nodded slowly. He would need to get his strength back. He hated being weak, be it physically or mentally. Mentally, he didn't have to worry any more. He was fully back. But physically... it was going to be a long recovery. And he was going to make sure that Sasuke got back on track, with or without Naruto. Itachi spent the rest of the afternoon pouring bottles of alcohol down the drain while on the phone with the head of every department from both the family corporation and Sasuke's own. By the time Sasuke came home from the office, Itachi had a list of things for him to do that was so long it would take him at least 6 months to be even halfway through. He didn't even leave his brother time to pitch a proper fit about all his alcohol being missing.

Itachi smirked, watching his brother stomp off to his room like he was still a teenager. It was good to be the older brother.

-xXx-

It had been an exhausting month since Itachi had come home, but a healing type of exhaustion. With Itachi pushing him, Sasuke had thrown himself back into work with ferocity, replacing his addiction to alcohol with an addiction to work. He only took breaks for helping Itachi with his physical therapy. It gave him a sense of purpose, and he finally felt the haze lifting that he had been living under for the past two years.

The only problem was that Itachi would not let his marriage to Naruto go. He kept asking Sasuke to let him have the photos and hotel records so he could look into it. Sasuke didn't _want_ to look into it anymore. He had done that already, and was finally starting to be able to function normally again. The absolute last thing he wanted was to get sucked back down into the hell of hoping it was some sort of mistake, only for it to be proven real. Again. There is no way he would take that emotional risk. He couldn't imagine anything that would convince him otherwise, and had told his brother as much. He wasn't interested in Naruto or their past relationship anymore. It was done and he was over it. He knew that Itachi had searched through both their houses, and all the company properties looking for it. But Sasuke just ignored him. He was finally getting his feet back under him, and he wasn't about to be knocked down again.

Sasuke was standing in the corner of the office lunchroom, waiting for his tea to steep. He had been working through most of the night and was feeling exhausted. He tried to ignore the sounds of the chatter from the workers behind him, but they were annoyingly loud. He vaguely recognized several of them as belonging to the marketing and creative advertising groups. _Figures - loud and talkative as usual._ He tried even harder to shut them out. The new head of the group had started today... Suigetsu, he recalled his name was. He was the 5th person to take on that role in two years. Karin, also in marketing, was sitting next to him. She had just been hired in the past month, but apparently she and Suigetsu had known each other for quite some time. Hopefully they would stay. He was tired of hiring someone new into those roles every few months. They just hadn't been able to really find a replacement for - he shut himself off from thinking about that, looking at his tea to see if it was ready yet.

"Karin, you _have_ to come to the Onyx club this weekend," Suigetsu was talking in an annoyingly loud voice. "You haven't been there in months! Yahiko has been _chasing_ this new artist and has actually been turned down at least twenty times by the guy. No one can believe it."

"Yahiko? Since when does anyone turn down Yahiko? He usually barely has to look at someone and they jump him. Especially an artist. Doesn't this guy realize that Yahiko runs one of the most influential art galleries in Japan? Not to mention being unbelievably hot and a total legend in the sack?"

"No, this guy, Naruto, totally fucking knows. Yahiko is actually the one who brought him over. He was painting in Andalusia, and his godfather somehow knew Yahiko from way back and sent him some pictures of this guy's work. I swear Yahiko had a hard on for him before he even saw him. You should see his paintings. They are seriously dark... made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. But then you meet the guy, and he's like this blond haired, blue-eyed, innocent looking Adonis." Suigetsu was completely oblivious to the abrupt silence that had fallen in the lunchroom at the mention of that name, nor did he notice the sudden and utter stillness of the dark haired man holding his now-forgotten tea.

"Are you sure that Yahiko is the only one falling for this guy? You sound pretty into him as well," Karin teased.

"Well, I generally prefer girls, but this guy is worth the swing," he waggled his eyebrows expressively. "But I don't have a chance if Yahiko is after him. Even Konan is eyeing him, and she has never looked at anyone besides Yahiko, despite their open relationship. Everyone is just waiting for Yahiko to bag him before they make their move. I mean, if they guy won't even say yes to _Yahiko_ , what chance do the rest of us have? Besides, I think he's starting to give in. There is definitely interest there on both sides. But evidently Naruto is pretty messed up about relationships or something." Suigetsu shrugged, as though this was a minor inconvenience soon to be brushed aside.

"He seems stable enough now, but he definitely was in free fall when he painted some of his stuff. Holy shit. You need to see it. You'll freak out it is so good. Yahiko is planning a big exhibit next week at Akatsuki Galleries, though the guy seems a little uncomfortable about which pieces he'll display to the public, so they've been arguing about it. Anyway, you know Yahiko and his obsession with "soul tormenting pain"... it was love at first sight for him. And they really hit it off right away, but Naruto had totally friend zoned him. Can you imagine? Yahiko blue balled," Suigetsu was laughing again. "Every time he'd try making a move on the guy, the blond would just send him flying and laugh it off. But then last week," Suigetsu lowered his voice a little, clearly getting into his gossip, and still failing to notice the way necks literally craned to hear what he was saying. "Friday, he had pinned Naruto up against the wall, but instead of shoving him off, Naruto just flipped him so their positions were reversed, and told him not to get too far ahead of himself assuming what their roles would be. Can you imagine? Yahiko bottoming? And the smile that Yahiko gave him was so fucking hot I couldn't believe that he didn't jump him right there, but Naruto just turned and walked back to the bar and finished his beer. Everyone is placing bets now to see if and when the deed will get done. Not to mention who will top," Suigetsu said, snickering.

"God, you should see what Yahiko has tried to do to this guy. Two weeks ago, someone started a poker game in one of the back rooms at the Onyx, and Yahiko and Naruto were the only two left in the hand, and Yahiko makes this insane bet with Naruto that if he loses the hand, he will stop hitting on Naruto, but if he wins, Naruto has to let everyone do body shots off him. And Konan totally helps Yahiko cheat to win. Even the kid saw it, but he just rolled his eyes and said something about people being so desperate to see some fucking skin, pulled off his shirt and went and laid down on the bar. And you should see this guy's body. I mean, _fuck me_! He's all tan and hard abs, and he has this totally tribal tattoo on his stomach. Yahiko was just about cumming. I seriously thought he was just going to slap some shackles on the guy right on the bar and do him. But everyone was lining up to do shots from this guy's navel, and so Yahiko had to just stand there and watch everyone else lick this guy he's so hot for." Suigetsu was laughing so hard he was almost choking at this point, and he missed the nervous glance that Karin shot around the room as she became increasingly aware that literally _everyone_ was listening to the lewd story that her friend was telling. Would they get fired for this? But Suigetsu was blissfully continuing.

"And then Konan actually climbs up on the bar and _straddles_ Naruto, and bends over his abs like she is going down on him or something, and takes her shot. Man, I thought Yahiko was going to _lose it_. And Naruto is just laying there like he doesn't even care that the hottest chick in the bar is on him. I mean, he's got these tight black jeans on, so you could totally see if he was into it or not, but it was just like -"

"Suigetsu!" Karin interrupted, clamping a hand over her friend's mouth. "Um... I think that people aren't used to these kind of stories being told in the workplace. Let's catch up over drinks tonight, ok?"

Suigetsu rolled his eyes. "Fine. Why are people so up tight? I mean, it's not like I'm showing them the video of it."

"You took a video?" Karin asked.

"Well, I'd hate to say anything that would make you _uncomfortable_ - _"_

Karin just glared and grabbed Suigetsu's phone. "Hey! I have private videos on that you bitch!" He lunged to grab it back and she raced out of the room, Suigetsu following, leaving the heavy awkward silence behind them as everyone remaining in the lunchroom tried very hard to NOT look at the dark haired CEO who walked stiffly out of the room.

Sasuke closed the door to his office, wondering who he knew that would be able to hack into someone else's cell phone, and what the penalty for something like that was. He had just sat down when his phone rang. He looked at the extension, and picked it up.

"What, Shikamaru," he bit out.

"Cheerful. You should be. I just received the final divorce agreement from Gaara. Naruto signed it. I'll go down and file it today."

"Wait," Sasuke felt a small thread of panic snaking through his stomach. Were his hands clammy and shaking? What the fuck? "It's been two years since I've looked it over. Can you just drop it by my desk for a final review before we file?"

Shikamaru silently breathed a sigh of relief. When Itachi had told him to go ahead and tell Sasuke about the signed agreement, Shikamaru had thought maybe the man was giving up on this after all. But apparently he knew his little brother quite well. Of all the filings, this last one was strictly boiler plate. A standard government form. There was nothing to review. Why was Sasuke asking for it? A flicker of hope came to life in Shikamaru. Sasuke was evidently having some serious second thoughts. Shikamaru wondered what had brought them on. "Fine, I'll drop it off before I head out for the day." He hung up the phone with his boss just as someone burst through his door. Something about a video of Naruto in the lunch room?

Sasuke just nodded, even though he knew his friend couldn't see him, his mind focused on the mental images that the overheard conversation had put into his mind. Images that he had been trying hard to block out for over two years. Evidently Naruto was back in Japan. And ready to move on. Suddenly Sasuke wasn't sure he was ready to let him. Maybe Itachi was right. Maybe it was worth one last fight after all. He needed to see Naruto.

-xXx-

Stalking was such a strong word. Sasuke preferred to think of it as... following an interesting lead that a fellow employee had mentioned. For reasons that he didn't want to fully explore, he had felt a visceral need to see Naruto when he learned he was back in Japan. For so many months after the breakup, Sasuke had been looking, searching the faces on the streets, in the night clubs, anywhere he went for even just a glimpse. But there had been none. And now, suddenly, he was back. Sasuke walked into the Onyx club on Friday night, and was instantly enveloped by the dark, pulsating music. The Onyx was not a dance club, like the ones Sasuke had frequented. It was much more intimate, with its unusual interior architecture more composed of secluded alcoves, the floor disjointed with several small areas raised up or lowered down, surrounded by beams and cloth draped around them. Sasuke stood for a moment, absorbing the atmosphere and finding himself strangely drawn to it. He waited for his eyes adjust to the dim light.

There was a small stage in the center for live music and a bar just to the left of it. A figure at the bar immediately caught Sasuke's attention. _Naruto._ Sasuke immediately pulled back into the heavy shadows of the nearest alcove, which appeared to lead to a balcony over the club entrance. Naruto was sitting on a stool with his back to the bar as he watched the band. His elbows were resting on the bar behind him, and the position drew attention to the defined muscles in his arms and pulled the black tank top he was wearing tightly across his chest. He was so much the same, but different, too. Still blond and tan, but somehow his body looked leaner and harder than it had before. Sasuke's fist clenched at the force of the feeling of possessiveness and desire that surged through him as he looked at his former lover. Why did he still feel this way, after all that had happened? Why was it still only Naruto he wanted in this way? God, he'd missed seeing him. Just looking at him. Something he had been deprived of for almost two years. But now, feeling the desire fisting inside him again, Sasuke realized that maybe it had been a good thing he hadn't seen Naruto before. He might not have been able to end the relationship otherwise. He knew he should walk away now, but he just couldn't.

Naruto's face was shadowed, so Sasuke couldn't read his expression, but he could tell he was talking to the man next to him. Sasuke instantly disliked that man. He had red hair, and multiple piercings. But he was definitely attractive. And definitely interested in Naruto, watching people approach them with a proprietary air, and glaring at anyone who got too close to Naruto. When he got too overt about it, Naruto would roll his eyes and nudge him with his elbow. _Must be the infamous Yahiko_ , Sasuke thought with a mental sneer. _He's not THAT hot,_ he thought, then instantly was annoyed at himself for the show of jealousy. Even if it was in his own mind.

Naruto threw back his head and laughed at something that Yahiko had said, and Sasuke felt his stomach twist at the sight - a pull of equal parts lust and jealousy. Why, after all this time, did the feeling of overwhelming attraction not fade? Why was it only Naruto that made him feel this way, despite his betrayal? Images slammed through his mind of their bodies twined together, and the searing pleasure that had always come of their couplings. The sense of belonging that had made him feel whole and human. Looking at Naruto casually lounging at the bar, Sasuke tried to shut down thoughts of just walking over and running his hands over Naruto's stomach. And that tattoo that Suigetsu had mentioned... Sasuke was suddenly very curious to know what it looked like. Exactly. 

 _What am I doing here_? he thought angrily, frustrated by the desire he still felt for his ex, despite everything. _I don't want him back._ He forced himself to think of the pictures that had ended it. But the sordid image in the photos just seemed so disconnected with the person he knew Naruto to be. The person who was in front of him, still seemingly... untouched wasn't the right word, but he had seen Naruto casually turn down at least four advances from pretty attractive potential partners. And he wasn't doing it for the guy he was sitting by. There had clearly been zero interest in Naruto's expression.

But there _was_ interest for the man he was sitting next to, and it made Sasuke's blood boil. While Naruto casually pulled away from the flirtatious touches of most people, he was allowing the pierced man to rest his hand so that it touched Naruto's forearm. And when their knees brushed, Naruto would just glance over and raise an eyebrow. And the smile that Yahiko sent him... Sasuke knew that look. And it was really pissing him off. He had noticed that the man was quick to refill Naruto's drink whenever he had finished one, but Naruto was drinking at his own pace, not getting himself smashed. Yahiko finally leaned over and said something in Naruto's ear, and Sasuke felt almost queasy when he saw the slow blush form over the tan cheeks. After a slight hesitation, Naruto nodded and the two got up and walked over toward Sasuke.

Panicked at the thought of being discovered, Sasuke slipped out the doorway to the street. Voices sounded above him, and he realized that the two had made their way to the balcony that had been directly behind where he had been standing.

Their voices drifted down to him

"Yahiko... this is not a great idea. I've had a little too much to drink. And don't think I didn't notice you trying to help that along, by the way." Naruto rolled his eyes when Yahiko just shamelessly shrugged.

"You need a little loosening up."

"And you're volunteering for the job?"

"I know you're attracted to me," Yahiko's voice was husky. Sasuke started to get pissed off again.

"Yeah. But that doesn't mean it's a good idea to just go for it. For either of our sakes."

"Why?"

"Look, Yahiko. You are in an open relationship, so I know you aren't looking for anything serious. And I'm not into casual sex. You know I was with Sasuke for a long time, and what a huge mess that ended up being."

"That ended two years ago. What does that have to do with anything now?"

"It's just... well... I've never really... been with anyone other than Sasuke. And I don't know that I'm ready to just jump right in yet."

Sasuke froze, trying to understand what Naruto was really saying.

"Wait. Are you telling me... are you _honestly_ telling me... that you haven't had sex since you and Sasuke broke up _two fucking years ago_?" Yahiko seemed both shocked and amused.

"Fuck you. I was pretty messed up for the first year after the break-up. It took me a year to just physically recover. And longer than that to get my shit together mentally."

"Messed up?"

"I landed in a hospital. Whatever. Long story, don't want to talk about it. But, I finally got my shit together. And for the past year, I've been just focusing on who I am. I don't want to be part of someone else anymore. I'm finally comfortable with myself as a completely separate, individual, functioning human being. And I don't want that to change. I don't want a relationship. But I also don't want to just fuck around." _Hospital? Naruto was in a hospital?_ Sasuke felt rooted to the spot as the words floated down to him.

Yahiko laughed softly. "Naruto. I'm not asking you to marry me. And I'm not thinking of you as just a fuck. Can't there be a middle ground, like normal people have? I like you... I think you are interesting, talented, and... incredibly attractive. There is a connection between us. You feel it, too. We have experienced the same darkness. Whatever this is, I think we would enjoy each other for a while, or even just for tonight. As friends, but still two completely separate, individual, functioning human beings." He leaned in kissing just below Naruto's ear, grinning wolfishly. "And I have to say, the idea of having sex with you when you have been abstinent for two years is pretty fucking hot."

Naruto shivered. God it had been so long. And he wanted this. He liked Yahiko. And Yahiko wasn't asking for something serious. Could he do this? Was he ready? Yahiko leaned in, his body flush against Naruto's. And a heat he hadn't felt in two years seared through his body.

"Friends with benefits, huh?" Naruto asked. Trying but failing to keep his voice unmoved.

"Friends with un-fucking- _believable_ benefits. Your body is definitely ready to move on, you little nun," Yahiko said huskily.

"Heh. Fuck you... after two years my body would probably be ready to move on with an inflatable doll. And don't get your hopes up on the nun thing. I don't role play on the first date," Naruto gasped as Yahiko's hand slid down his erection through his jeans.

"No role play tonight, huh? How do you feel about bondage then," Yahiko said suggestively, beginning to unbutton Naruto's shirt while grinding against him.

"Holy god, Yahiko," Naruto's voice was shaking. Sasuke clenched his fists, remembering that sound so well. He needed to get the hell out of here. It was pretty clear now where this was going, and he didn't want to hear it play out to its obvious conclusion. This was bad enough.

"Let it go, Naruto. It's past time. Have some fun with me tonight," Yahiko's voice had gone back to its seductive rasp.

"Ok... ok," Naruto said, his voice raspy with arousal.

"Let's get out of here," Yahiko said.

Sasuke stumbled as he walked quickly to his car. He sat behind the wheel, frozen. _All this time... he waited for me all this time._ He had known Naruto almost his whole life. And he would bet almost anything that Naruto was not lying. What guy would admit to that kind of vulnerability and sexual inexperience if he were trying to score? But it couldn't be true that Naruto hadn't had sex with anyone other than him. He had the fucking photos. All he had wanted to do was go back in and grab Naruto out of there. But he had no right. And after everything that had happened, Naruto would likely just throw him off the balcony if he tried. The last thing he needed was more public humiliation over the end of his marriage. Nothing was making sense. Sasuke felt his head spinning. Could he have made a mistake? He felt his stomach drop at the thought. He had been so sure. He had checked so closely. But now... he didn't know what to think. There was only one thing to do at this point.

. . . .

Sasuke walked into Itachi's room at two in the morning, dropping a folder down on the surprised man's lap as he instantly woke up.

"There. This is what I received. Now you tell me how this is not real."

Itachi opened the folder, and looked at the pictures for several minutes. He decided not to mention to Sasuke that Naruto had made an appointment with him on Monday to sell him his part of the business. "I think we need to call in Hyuuga Hinata and Haruno Sakura and ask them directly. Yes?"

"Fine. And I also want to find out about Naruto being hospitalized after the break-up."

Itachi looked at his brother, wondering where he had heard that information. Something had happened tonight. He considered all the potential barriers that were going to be in Sasuke's way if he decided he wanted another try with Naruto. "If you want to find out what happened to Naruto after you dumped him, you'll have to go see Gaara."

-xXx-

 _to be continued_... **please** **comment!** I deleted the lemon with Naruto and Yahiko, because it always annoys me when I am reading NaruSasu or SasuNaru and I come across long, graphic descriptions of them having sex with other people. But just to be clear, the deed is done.

 ***** of course, Shima is not actually a geezer toad in this story... just a geezer man. :-) But he still teaches Naruto meditation and helps him to become stronger.


	4. Revelations

**Author's note -** Thank you so much to everyone who commented! It is so much more fun to write with your questions and reactions. Keeps me motivated. :-) And I am sure that you all probably gathered this from the first chapter, but this isn't the kind of story that will include Sasuke lying in a bed of rose petals or Naruto squealing and throwing himself into Sasuke's "big strong arms". This is a story about obsessive love, not Disney love. Read at your own risk. :-)

-xXx-

**Sunday**

Itachi looked at the photos in more detail when Sasuke was at the gym. While he could see Sasuke's point that it seemed pretty clear what was happening, there were some things that bothered him. They both showed Naruto in bed naked at least from the waist up, his legs covered by the crimson sheets, looking flushed. The first showed Hinata standing next to him, wearing just a towel. She was leaning over him, with her hand under his head at the base of his neck. Sakura was wearing a bra and panties, and was kneeling on the bed beside Naruto, also leaning over him with her arms around him. The second was even worse. Sakura was now kneeling between Naruto's legs, and her face just above his crotch. The camera was directly behind her, so it wasn't possible to see exactly what her mouth was doing but... it didn't look good. Hinata was watching her, with a look of expectancy on her face.

The towel bothered Itachi. If you have gotten a woman out of her clothes and into your bedroom, why would she be back in a towel before the event was over? It didn't usually play out that way, even with the shy ones. And her expression was off. It didn't look lustful or even embarrassed. In the first photo, she looked more worried. In the second, she looked like she was just... waiting for something. Sakura's face was turned away from the camera both times, so he got no read there. Naruto was flushed, and his eyes were closed in both. In the second he appeared to be grimacing, potentially in appreciation from the ministrations of the pink-haired woman between his thighs. But potentially not.

The second thing that bothered Itachi was that Naruto was not touching either woman in either of the photos. Naruto was one of the most demonstrably affectionate people that Itachi had ever met, something that had caused no small amount of embarrassment and discomfort to Sasuke and later himself as the blond had become embedded in their lives. He couldn't imagine Naruto having sex with someone and _not_ touching them. Not that he spent a lot of time thinking about his brother-in-law having sex. But he had walked in on enough scenes with Naruto and Sasuke (waaay more than he ever had wanted to know about his little brother) that he was pretty confident in that.

Of course, blinded by shock and hurt, he wouldn't have expected Sasuke to think about details like that. He had at least had the presence of mind to verify the authenticity of the photos, but then had just gone into full-blown Uchiha emotional defense mode. Which basically meant shut down all emotions and destroy the source of the pain with all possible speed and force.

Itachi had called the Hyuuga residence and asked to speak with Hinata, only to be informed that the entire family was off at the Hyuuga country estate for the wedding of one of the clan, and would not be back until the following week. He had left a message on Sakura's answering machine, but had not heard back. He was meeting with Naruto tomorrow to discuss the joint business. But it was not his place to confront Naruto about the photos. If this was going to be resolved, that conversation belonged to Sasuke. But he wasn't concerned. There were other ways of testing the waters with Naruto.

-xXx-

Sasuke stood in the shower, letting the hot water pour over him and loosen his tense muscles. He needed to get his head around what he was really doing with Naruto. What did he want to happen at this point? When he had heard that Naruto was back, he had reacted without thinking. He wanted to see him, so he had gone to the club. But everything that he had felt after that point made no sense. For two years, he had been telling himself that he had wanted to see Naruto so that he could hurt him, to see him suffer. But when he actually had seen him, none of that had been on his mind. He had simply drunk in the sight of his former lover, then left. Why?

He rested his head on the wall of the shower. He still desired Naruto. That was a simple fact he had to accept. He had felt it stir in his stomach as soon as he had seen him, a tension that he had never felt for anyone else. In a way, that was the easiest of all his emotions right now to acknowledge. It meant the least of all of them, powerful though it was. But what he really felt ran much deeper than desire. When he had felt jealousy seeing Naruto with Yahiko, it was not just for the physical intimacy that they clearly had. It was for the way that they were talking, the way Naruto had laughed at something the man had said, the way Naruto had been focused only on Yahiko, not the others that had approached him. The way it had been with Sasuke and Naruto. And Sasuke missed that. Missed simply being with Naruto, hearing the interesting and sometimes stupid things he would say, seeing the room fill with life and energy just because Naruto had entered it. Having someone who wasn't impressed with money or power, but just liked him for who he was. He had always known that Naruto liked him _despite_ his wealth and family name, not _because_ of it. Just as he was sure that Naruto liked Yahiko not because he was influential in the art community, but because of the man himself.

Sasuke seethed at the thought, and was annoyed at himself for it. After all, wasn't he the one who had ended it? Dog in the manger didn't suit him. He was better than that.

But it wasn't ended. Sasuke knew it... probably had always known it on some level. And if he were ruthlessly honest with himself, after two years of being without Naruto and feeling that void acutely, he would want Naruto even if the photos were exactly what they appeared to be. He smiled humorlessly at his own weakness. And if the photos were somehow wrong... Sasuke felt his stomach clench at the thought. He desperately had wanted to believe that Naruto had never betrayed him. But if it were true, and this had all been somehow a trick, then what would he do? He knew just how cruel and ruthless he had been. Is it even possible to make something like that right? Sasuke thought back to the last night they had been together. If Naruto had really been innocent, and Sasuke had ended it that way, there might be no going back. No matter how much you love a person, there are some things that are just unforgivable. And Sasuke knew that what he did probably fit into that category. So then what would he do?

Sasuke stepped out of the shower and dried himself off. He looked at himself objectively in the full length bathroom mirror. His face as it always had been, classical Uchiha features. His arms and abdomen were well defined under the pale smooth skin, his legs strong and toned, without being bulky. His whole life people had told him how flawless his face and form were, had offered him anything just for a chance to fuck him even once. He laughed sneeringly at himself. Of all the people he had chosen to fall in love with, he had picked one of the only ones who would never love him back just for the way he looked and blindly forgive all his sins. He supposed that was one of the main reasons he had been so fixated on Naruto. Naruto had validated Sasuke's self worth separate from his looks or money. When Naruto had befriended him, it had meant that he was worthy of friendship outside of what everyone else used him for. And when Naruto had loved him, it had meant that there was something inside of Sasuke that was worth loving, that was separate from the exterior that everyone else fixated on to the exclusion of anything else he had to offer. That was why the betrayal had hurt so much. Because then it meant that... maybe what was inside Sasuke wasn't worth much after all. Maybe all he _was_ was his looks and family money.

Sasuke didn't know what he hoped for at this point. That the affair had never happened, and he had destroyed the relationship irreparably on his own, or that the affair _had_ happened, and he would have to deal with the fact that he still wanted Naruto anyway. Neither seemed like a particularly happy ending.

He needed to know how Naruto felt. Did he hate him? Miss him? Feel guilty? Had he moved on entirely? Even if things couldn't be the way they were, he was not going to simply let Naruto go again. He knew himself well enough to acknowledge that. He needed to test the waters somewhere neutral to get a better read on how Naruto felt about him at this point. Two years was a long time. But not compared to the amount of time they had been together. Not compared to what they had been to each other. He knew that it would be better to wait until he had talked to Hinata and Sakura, and knew for sure what had happened. But his thoughts were consumed now with visions of Naruto moving on and disappearing again from his life. If he waited too long, the last tie would be cut and there would be nothing left to hold on to. He had looked into the schedule of showings at the art gallery that Suigetsu had mentioned. Naruto's works would be displayed Tuesday. Sasuke would try to track down Sakura before then, but either way, he was going to go see Naruto.

-xXx-

**Monday**

Naruto walked up to the security desk at Uchiha Corporation, not surprised by the guard's look of shocked recognition. Before the divorce, Sasuke had taken over the running of the corporation while Itachi was in the coma, and Naruto had regularly come by to meet him for lunch or pick him up after work. But it had been two years since anyone had seen the blond in that building. And he knew that word of his arrival would reach the top floor long before he did. He only hoped that Sasuke was not in the building.

Jugo simply nodded when Naruto said he had an appointment with Uchiha Itachi, and called up to Itachi's assistant to let her know Naruto was on his way up. Naruto braced himself for a potential encounter with Sasuke. He had managed to avoid seeing him so far since he had been back, but he knew that eventually they would run into each other. Especially if Naruto spent any time inside a building bearing the man's last name. But he had to get this done. He had signed the divorce papers shortly after arriving back in Japan, and even if he hadn't received official confirmation from Gaara, he was sure that it had gone through smoothly. Someone would have told him if there had been any problems. With the marriage officially over, the jointly owned business was the last string.

He reached the top floor and walked as directly as he could to Itachi's office, politely acknowledging the shocked looks and greetings from people who had known him before, but not staying to talk with anyone. He wasn't back in this office to stay.

He took a deep breath as he was shown into Itachi's office, relieved to see the man was alone and his brother nowhere in sight.

Itachi stood as he entered, his face expressionless, but not hostile. "Naruto," he greeted, his voice smooth and controlled.

Naruto hesitated only a second before walking around the desk and embracing him, earning a not-so-surprised grunt from the typically stoic man.

"Itachi. I am so glad you are awake. God, I missed you. How are you? You look good," Naruto's voice was rough with emotion, his face sincere.

Itachi sighed slightly and gave a small hug back. They had known each other a very long time. "I'm well," was all he said.

Naruto pulled away, looking slightly uncomfortable. "I got back in the country two months ago. I wanted to come to see you right away when I heard you were out of the hospital, but..." he trailed off, and shrugged, sadness etching his features. "You know about Sasuke and me."

Itachi nodded, sitting down and gesturing Naruto to sit as well. "I was sorry to hear about the split," Itachi said sincerely. He carefully studied Naruto's expression. He saw sadness, but not fear or guilt. Naruto's face had always been an open book. And that, more than anything that the man would say to him over the course of the next hour, convinced him that Naruto had never cheated. Naruto had been rather terrified of Itachi when they were younger... as was basically everyone else. And while their relationship had evolved to be closer over the years, if Naruto had really done something to hurt Sasuke, he would be quaking in his shoes to face Itachi now. Naruto definitely had no idea why Sasuke had ended it. There had been no affair. A knot in Itachi's chest released at the knowledge.

"So..." Naruto was fidgeting a little with the sleeves of his shirt, which Itachi noticed were buttoned at the cuff. The collar of his shirt was also buttoned all the way to the top. It was... strange. In all the years that Itachi had known Naruto, the man had never worn his shirts so formally, typically having his sleeves rolled up and his collar unbuttoned at least two or three buttons, claiming he didn't like to be strangled by his own clothing. It had been a constant battle for Sasuke to force Naruto into formal business attire for press conferences or formal meetings, and he was usually out of it as soon as humanly possible. For him to be so buttoned up voluntarily was almost inconceivable. "I wanted to talk to you about buying me out of my share of the business," Naruto began. "With the divorce finalized now, it just doesn't make sense for me to keep it anymore."

"I take it you don't want to sell to Sasuke?" Itachi raised a brow, wanting to see how the blond responded.

"I honestly don't care if you transfer the ownership of my shares to him, or split them, or whatever. Given everything that's happened between me and Sasuke, I'd rather just deal with you for the transaction. After we talk through the basics today, Shikamaru and Gaara can take over and finalize things."

Itachi looked at him thoughtfully. _So he isn't out to put Sasuke under my thumb by giving me a controlling majority share of their company. He just wants to avoid Sasuke. There is no vindictiveness in this._ He thought again about the sadness in the Naruto's expression, and he seeming lack of desire for revenge. He remembered what Shikamaru had told him about the sleeping pills, and felt a sudden sense of fear twist through him when he looked at Naruto's buttoned cuffs. "Unbutton your cuffs." Itachi said flatly.

"What?" Naruto looked... embarrassed?

"Unbutton your cuffs and roll up your sleeves," Itachi fixed him with a stare that Naruto recognized from back when he and Sasuke would get caught by the older man for something stupid they had done. It was a little disconcerting that it worked as effectively on the 25-year-old Naruto as it had on the 12-year-old Naruto. Blushing even more, Naruto unbuttoned his cuffs and rolled up his sleeves.

Itachi grabbed his arm, and turned them over to look at the underside of his wrists, then breathed out a sigh of relief. No scars or cuts. He relaxed. But he did realize now the reason for Naruto's discomfort. There were bruises encircling his wrists, with the clear imprint of some kind of shackle or handcuff. He gave Naruto an amused smirk.

Still blushing, Naruto undid two of the buttons on his collar, revealing two clearly marked hickies on his collar bone. "Happy? What the fuck, Itachi."

"Why bother to cover that up? We were all living together while you two were in high school. Surely you realize that even with the thick walls of the estate, I knew you were not a virgin anymore," Itachi watched Naruto turning all shades of red, clearly remembering several unfortunate moments when Sasuke and Naruto had thought they were alone in the house (or been too fucking horny to care), and Itachi had walked in on them in various locations and positions.

Naruto made a slightly strangled sound. "I mean... I just thought... since you're Sasuke's brother and all... it would be... awkward."

And it was. At least for Naruto. But then he started to think through his embarrassment and realized that Itachi had not been looking for signs of sex on his wrist. He had been looking for something else. Naruto's embarrassment fled and his stomach dropped. "You know about what happened to me, don't you. How did you find out? Did Sasuke know?" The last question escaped before he could bite it back. If Sasuke had known what had happened to him and where he was, and still hadn't cared enough to even call him, Naruto didn't know what to think.

Itachi caught the undertone of Naruto's last question, and looked Naruto directly in the eye. "Sasuke had no idea you were in the hospital. He still doesn't know what happened. But... he has heard some rumors, and is asking around," Itachi hesitated. It was the first time Naruto could remember seeing the man look uncertain about something. "Naruto. Did you really try to kill yourself?"

Naruto looked down. That was a time in his life he'd rather erase. God, what a mess he'd been. "No. If I really had wanted to do it, I would have found a much more fool-proof way." That didn't comfort Itachi much, but it was something. " _Not_ slitting my wrists, either. I just... was so tired. And I wasn't sleeping. And someone offered me some pills, and I just took some. It was... stupid. I'd never been much for medications, so I had no idea how many to take and I couldn't be bothered to find out. Nothing seemed to matter much at that point to me." He was staring at his hand as he flexed and clenched it, not wanting to look into the onyx eyes and see the disgust he knew must be there for such weakness. "I know it's pretty pathetic right? Boo-hoo, my fucking asshole boyfriend dumped me, so then I just fall apart."

He looked up to see Itachi's gaze waiting for him to look him in the eye. The older man allowed a rare flash of his emotions to show. He looked... sad. But luckily there was no pity. "It's not pathetic. You loved my brother, and you had built your life around him. You were allowed to grieve. Don't be ashamed of that. And you pulled yourself back together, on your own. Even my brother wasn't able to do it without my help. He was slowly drinking himself to death after you left."

Itachi didn't miss the flash of pain and worry that crossed Naruto's face at those words. "Have I told you how fucking glad I am that you are out of that hospital, Itachi?"

Itachi smiled slightly, "I wish I had not been in there when all this happened. Maybe I could have prevented it."

Naruto's face closed up suddenly. "No. There was no preventing this. I was never going to be enough for Sasuke. We'd never been equals. But, it would have been good if it had at least ended differently."

Itachi was watching him carefully again. "So that's why you think Sasuke ended it? Because after all this time he decided that you weren't good enough for him?"

"Sasuke _told_ me that was the reason. He was tired of me. And I wasn't enough."

"And you believed him?"

"Itachi. Don't. You weren't there. You don't know what your brother did. Sasuke can be a total bastard, but up until that week, I had always thought that underneath it all he was a decent person. Someone I admired and respected. But I found out I was wrong. Either he changed, or I never really knew the real him. I could accept that he got tired of me. Honestly, I always kind of wondered what he saw in me. He could have had anyone. And I was no one. But I can't ever get over the way he just evicted me from his life without even a conversation. That all of our years of friendship weren't even worth a fucking _discussion_ about what had gone wrong." Naruto could hear the bitterness in his own voice, and was annoyed by it. It was time to fucking move on, so why was he even talking about this to his ex's brother?

"What if you were wrong."

"What do you mean?"

"What if he had an actual reason for thinking you betrayed him?"

"Then he is an idiot and he should have had the fucking balls to talk to me about it. I would never have betrayed him in anything. And if he doesn't know _that_ , then he never knew me. It doesn't really matter what the reason was, at this point." Naruto ran his hand through his hair. "Look, Itachi, I'm trying to be a good guy here. I am giving you and your brother a chance to buy me out of the business for old time's sake. But if you won't, I'll sell to someone else. I'm done with that company. There is no way in hell I am going back to work there, and I don't like feeling like I am just riding off Sasuke's coattails with the profits. I have a new job that I enjoy, and I want to just start fresh. Have Shikamaru contact Gaara within the next two weeks if you are interested in buying me out. If not, I'll let you know when I find someone who is."

Naruto stood to leave, sad knowing that - realistically - he was not likely to see Itachi again. As much as he had viewed the man as his own brother, it would be unworkable given what had happened with his marriage.

"Itachi, I... I just wanted to say thanks. You were like a real brother to me. And you supported Sasuke and me through so much of our time together. I really wish things had turned out differently. But... I guess it isn't very likely we'll cross paths much anymore." He wouldn't put Itachi in that position, as hard as it was to lose his friendship.

He reached his hand out to the older man, who clasped it in a firm grasp.

"You never know," Itachi said, his expression unreadable. As always.

-xXx-

"Karin!" Suigetsu called out as he saw the redhead heading into her office to start the day.

Karin turned, needing to tell Suigetsu what she had learned from one of her co-workers over the weekend. And she needed to hurry before Suigetsu's mouth got them both fired. She had noticed their boss had just exited his office, most likely to discuss his appointment calendar for the week with his assistant who had just arrived at her desk.

"Did you hear? It finally happened! They were evidently at it _all weekend._ Yahiko limped into Onyx Sunday night. _Limped_! Looking smug as hell of course. He said Naruto was in even worse sh-" at that point Karin, who had literally been sprinting across the office, had finally reached him and clamped her hand over his mouth, bodily dragging him into her office and ignoring the rabidly curious stares following them.

Her door slammed, and there were a few moments of murmured voices before a shout was heard through her thick door, "How could Naruto have been married to such a tight-ass as _him_? Are you fucking _serious_? What the hell do they even have in common besides both being hot?" There was the sound of someone being pummeled, and a few minutes later a slightly bruised but still shocked looking Suigetsu was walking out of her office, and cheerfully called good morning to his pale, dark-haired boss who had been standing across the hall discussing his morning agenda with his assistant, pretending not to have heard anything. Only his assistant had noticed the white-knuckled death grip that Sasuke had on his folio, and she wisely chose to not address it.

Everyone in the office was torn between relief that the incredibly awkward outbursts of the new head of creative marketing would be over, but disappointed that they would evidently no longer get to hear the latest exploits of their former boss, and secretly gloat at the impact they had on their remaining boss.

**Tuesday**

Sasuke had been debating whether or not to go into the exhibit at Akatsuki galleries. The earliest Gaara had been willing to give him an appointment on his calendar was Thursday. Sakura had not returned any of his calls, and when he had swung by the hospital where she worked he had been told she had called in sick that day and wasn't available. Hinata was still out of town. But he was sick of waiting around. He had been waiting for two fucking years.

Itachi had told Sasuke about meeting with Naruto to sell his share of the company. And despite the fact that Sasuke had been pushing for almost a year for that exact thing (which Gaara had evidently neglected to even fucking _tell_ Naruto about), Sasuke was now uncertain that he really wanted to buy Naruto out. But he definitely didn't want him selling to some random idiot, either.

So in the end, he found himself standing outside an art gallery at 10 o'clock at night, with people in formal dress going in and out, trying to decide if he should go in and talk to Naruto, and - if so - what the hell he should say to a man he didn't know if he should crucify or abjectly apologize to. It would be a bit of a tricky situation.

. . . .

Naruto stood in the long room full of strangers looking at his paintings. To him, it felt like the emotional equivalent of being stripped naked under flood lights and searched. In fact, he thought he'd probably be more comfortable in that scenario than the one he presently found himself in. At least he had not contacted any of his old friends yet. He had purposely waited until after this exhibit was over before reaching out, not wanting any to feel 'slighted' that he didn't invite them but also really not wanting any of them here. This was personal. He could allow strangers to view this, since they had no context to connect it to and would look at his works more objectively. And he had invited Gaara, who already knew far worse than even what these paintings reflected. But that would be all. None of his friends had been particularly into art, except for maybe Neji and Sasuke who had the wealth to collect some of the classics, but they would never attend something like this. Naruto breathed a small laugh. This was not nearly high society enough to attract either of them, so he should be safe.

His eyes darted periodically to Yahiko, glaring at the man who had talked him into this. Yahiko smiled serenely back. _Fuck him._ Naruto glanced at the clock. In less than an hour, he could leave. Thank fucking god.

He felt a tension between his shoulder blades, as though someone was staring at him. He slowly turned, praying it would not be someone he knew. Only to be confronted by the specter of the absolute _last_ person he wanted to see here.

"Sasuke," he said, not moving from his spot in the middle of the gallery, watching as the man who had ripped his life to pieces two years ago walked casually towards him, a smirk on his beautiful face. Naruto felt completely frozen. He was not prepared for this. Not here. Why the fuck did Sasuke have to find him here? What could he possibly want?

Naruto fought the urge to look to Yahiko. He didn't need help dealing with his past. He was strong enough to put on a polite social mask in public, and not make a scene. But his shock was slowly melting away into a bubbling anger that swirled just beneath the surface. _Sasuke had some fucking balls to just walk in here and give me that look, as though he had any right to be involved in my life anymore._ Naruto wasn't practiced at hiding his emotions. But that didn't mean he couldn't do it if he really tried. So he focused on schooling all his feelings of confusion, anger, and hurt from his face. He thought of the meditation techniques that Sifu Shima had taught him for calming the mind. If Sasuke wanted to play mind games, Naruto could too. By the time Sasuke had reached him, Naruto was fully in control of himself again.

"Slumming it, Sasuke?" Naruto said lazily, allowing a cynical smile to twist his lips. "I wouldn't have thought something so far beneath you would warrant your interest."

Surprise and wariness flashed across Sasuke's otherwise stoic features. Cynicism wasn't something he was used to seeing from Naruto. He had expected a major explosion of some kind, or Naruto ignoring him completely.

"Actually, I heard from Suigetsu that you were having a showing here tonight." Sasuke smiled as Naruto was startled out of his mask of indifference. If it was a game of emotional control and mind fucking that they were playing, Sasuke had a clear advantage in this arena. "Oh, you didn't know? He works for us now. The new head of creative marketing. Started last week."

Naruto processed what the loud-mouthed Suigetsu knew about his new life, and the probability that he had told the entire office once he found out Naruto used to work there. Naruto was able to keep the stream of cursing internal rather than giving it voice, but the amused look on Sasuke's face showed that the man clearly knew what Naruto was thinking anyway.

"I hear you are into taking interesting wagers at bars now," Sasuke continued, watching as Naruto's posture shifted slightly into a subtly aggressive stance, his eyes were narrowed. Sasuke could feel a coiled tension pumping off Naruto's body, and his own body's immediate response as he mirrored Naruto's aggressive posture. God, Sasuke had missed this. Just this. Everyone else in his life always deferred to him, paid lip service and agreed to whatever he wanted. But never Naruto. Naruto would just go headlong into a conflict with him, never batting an eye to things like 'station' or 'deference'. It had always been this way between the two of them. This instant combat readiness and battle for dominance between two equals. When they were young, it had been physical. Then they matured, and it became verbal. Then they became lovers, and it became physical again, but in a different way. No matter who won, the arguments they had ended in the same way. Sex between them was always amazing, but the sex when they fought was... unbelievable. Sasuke had to remind himself forcibly that this was not going to end that way, but he couldn't help the jump of pure lust that shot through him as his body remembered this feeling exactly. God, it had been too long since anyone had made him feel so alive.

"Yeah, well. I've found a lot of new things to entertain me over the past two years. The freedom has been amazing and... liberating." Naruto said and smiled, seeing he had scored a direct hit with this comment. Sasuke visibly tensed and his onyx eyes narrowed dangerously. Naruto was barely able to contain a wolfish grin, but he knew that this type of battle with Sasuke was dangerous... neither of them were fully rational when it came to the other. They never had been. Which meant he needed to bring this to a close quickly and get the hell out of here.

"But I'm sure you didn't come here to discuss my sex life, or my other new hobbies. And clearly the art here would be below your standards. So let's cut to the chase, Sasuke. What do you want?"

Sasuke blinked at the direct but controlled verbal assault. Naruto had evidently been working on self-control if nothing else since they had been apart.

Sasuke thought about ways he could answer Naruto's question, but the truth was he really didn't know the answer himself.  All he knew was that he had needed to see Naruto.  And he wasn't ready to have him walk out of his life again.  But that wasn't something he could tell the closed-off man standing in front of him, so he settled on another truth that Naruto might find more compelling.

"Itachi told me you are planning on selling your share of the business. We have had a difficult time finding suitable replacements for the roles that you had played in the business, given that you left so abruptly and there was no time to transition someone in properly. Before you sell, I was hoping that you could come back and spend a few months training your replacements so we can have the business performing optimally again. That way, you can get top dollar for your share. And of course, the employees who also have shares in the company will benefit."

Naruto didn't know what to say. Of everything that he had expected to come out of Sasuke's mouth, this hadn't even made the list. _Fucking bastard. He always knows how to get what he wants._ But the problem was that Naruto really didn't know what Sasuke wanted anymore. He had seen the flash of lust when they had been verbally sparring earlier. But he also remembered the way that Sasuke had looked at him that last night they were together, when he had completely broken him. Even if Sasuke still wanted Naruto in that way, it by no means meant that they didn't simultaneously want to destroy him. Naruto searched Sasuke's face, trying to read his motivation for this. But he couldn't be sure. After everything that had happened the last time they met, he no longer had any faith that he had ever really known how to read this man in the first place.

Sasuke saw the hesitation on his face, and simply waited, knowing that once he had put it in terms of him being needed to help the employees that Naruto had befriended and supported, Sasuke had won. It was now just a matter of waiting for Naruto to acknowledge it.

"We'll see. I'll call Kiba and discuss it with him," Naruto said noncommittally, hating the smug look that appeared at his words. Sasuke clearly knew that this was already a done deal.

But Naruto was going to make it clear exactly what he was coming back for. A small, cold smile ghosted across Naruto's lips, the expression again seeming so foreign on his face. Naruto walked the three steps that brought him just alongside his former lover, resting his hand on the man's shoulder.

"But just to be clear Sasuke, if I come back for a bit it's not going to be to play secretary and the boss with you, nah? If you don't like the replacements that Kiba hired, just go and have him update the profile and find someone more to your taste," he spoke low, directly into Sasuke's ear.

Sasuke felt the heat from Naruto's breath against his neck go straight to his groin. And then Naruto was gone, walking across the room to speak with a man with red hair and multiple piercings. _Yahiko._ God, how Sasuke hated that name.

Sasuke slowly smiled. He looked at Naruto, who just happened to glance up at that exact moment and smile at him.

He raised a single black eyebrow in response. Two could play at this game. Naruto might remember all his buttons. But he remembered Naruto's. He would bide his time. He knew he'd be seeing Naruto again soon.

Sasuke didn't want to seem as though he had been 'dismissed' by Naruto. And he had some real curiosity to see what his friend had painted while he had been gone. Naruto's paintings, like his expressive face, had always been amazing works of art that reflected the depth of his emotions and experiences. In the past, most of his pieces had involved Sasuke. He was curious, and a bit hesitant, to see what Naruto had focused on without him.

The first painting he saw appeared to be some sort of cityscape. It was bright and colorful, but somehow managed to be disturbing and surreal at the same time. As though the cheerful colors were somehow mocking the observer. Sasuke frowned a bit and moved on to another one. He froze, staring into a pair of eyes in the center of the canvass that he recognized instantly, their onyx hue being the same he saw in the mirror every morning. But these were filled with hate and disgust, set not in a face but in a dark eddy of black and brown and red that made Sasuke feel almost dizzy with its subtle swirling effect. Sasuke looked at the title of the piece. _The Ending._ He stood there, unable to move. Had his eyes really looked like that? He supposed they had. He felt a little queasy about this vision of himself being so embedded in Naruto's memory that he had been able to paint it like this, even if he had felt Naruto deserved it. The pain of that night was captured so completely in this painting that Sasuke almost couldn't look away. He didn't notice the two pairs of eyes that watched his every reaction. He took a step back from the painting, and drew a breath, trying to gather himself.

He walked to the next one. It was simply titled 'Tired'. It seemed at first to be a fairly innocent scene of a bedroom, but in the same way that the cityscape had been disturbing, this one also had undertones that bothered the observer. The very bright but somehow out of focus and disorienting view from the window, the heavy darkness that seemed to hang in the room. But what had the hair rising on Sasuke's arms was they way that the painting drew the eye to a small bottle of pills on the nightstand in the corner of the painting. They seemed somehow sinister. Sasuke looked closer, and saw that the label had been painted to clearly show that they were sleeping pills. Several scattered across the table.

Sasuke jerked as he felt someone standing along side of him. He turned, expecting to see Naruto, wanting to demand he explain what the sickening feeling was that he had sensed in this painting. He was met with jade green eyes, looking at him measuringly. Gaara. Sasuke glanced around the room, looking for Naruto, but not finding him. He noticed Yahiko watching him from a few feet away, his expression similar to Gaara's. Sasuke forced himself to take a deep breath. He needed to know what had happened. Itachi had told him to ask Gaara.

"You know what happened, don't you?" Sasuke asked Gaara. "Something bad. Something I caused. I need to... I need to know."

Gaara continued to observe Sasuke without speaking. When Sasuke thought maybe the man was just going to ignore him, he finally spoke. "Yes. You need to know. When you threw Naruto out two years ago, he went to stay with his godfather. He basically stopped eating for about two months, and ended up taking an overdose of sleeping pills. He almost died. You almost killed him."

Sasuke felt like he had just been punched in the stomach. He saw a chair over at the end of the aisle, and stumbled to it and sat down, lowering his head into his hands. "I didn't know. I never wanted..." He stopped, not even sure what to say. For so long, all he had wanted was to see Naruto suffer. But now that he knew how much he had, he couldn't bear it. Even if Naruto had cheated, he hadn't wanted this. If Naruto had died... Sasuke's brain simply stopped functioning at the thought. He looked up and saw both Yahiko and Gaara standing before him.

"Where is Naruto?" Sasuke asked, his eyes slightly glazed. "I need to talk to him."

Yahiko looked at him, his expression neutral. "He left shortly after you came in. He doesn't want to talk to you right now. He wasn't expecting you to be here."

Sasuke nodded. He had no idea that this was what the paintings would be. He understood how exposed Naruto must have felt. He had masked it well... better than he ever used to be able to. "I won't go to him tonight, then." As hard as that was for Sasuke to say, he knew it was the least he could do to give his friend time. "But, I want to see him. We need to talk."

"When Naruto is ready to talk to you, I'm sure he knows where to find you. At this point, you have no right to force your way back into his life, even if you regret what you did before," Yahiko's eyes didn't leave his.

Gaara stepped closer, leaning down and speaking in a low voice. "You might look sad now, finding out that you broke Naruto to the extent that you did. But don't think for a moment that I don't know that you fully intended to hurt him at the time," Sasuke turned to see cold green eyes piercing him. "And I am going to tell you something, Sasuke. If you do any more damage to him, anything that sends him back into that spiral, I will take power of attorney from Naruto and do what he should have done from the beginning. I will come after you for everything you've got and I will fucking _bury_ you." With that, the redhead turned and walked out of the room.

-xXx-

Naruto closed the door to his apartment and leaned his back against it, slowly blowing out his breath as he slid down the door and sat on the floor. Holy fuck. He had not been prepared for this. It had been his absolute worst case scenario to have Sasuke show up at the gallery. Naruto hadn't stuck around to see if Sasuke had looked at the paintings, or what his reaction had been. And he had no desire to ever find out. Whether it was gloating or pity, he didn't want either.

Naruto played the conversation back through his mind. He still couldn't figure out what Sasuke was after. Sasuke didn't vacillate. Once he decided something, it was final. There is no way in hell that Sasuke had somehow changed his mind about Naruto not being good enough for him and now wanted him back. Sasuke wouldn't have ended it they way he did if there had been any doubt in his mind at all. But the lust he had seen in Sasuke's eyes had been real. That was something that even Sasuke had never been able to conceal from him. It was one of the few true levers of power that Naruto had always held over the man. The other had been trust, but that was clearly gone now, on both sides.

So what was this? Was Sasuke truly still not satisfied with the pound of flesh he had already extracted from Naruto's soul? Was it just morbid curiosity to see what Naruto had done without him? Did he think somehow that they could try to become friends again after everything that had happened?

Naruto was exhausted. And he was angry, but mostly at himself. After everything that bastard had done to him, how could he still feel what he had at the mere sight of him? When he had seen Sasuke standing there, looking at him, with that smirk... everything that Naruto had tried to bury had come flooding back. After all that had happened, how could he still want the man who had crushed him? How could he still care about the rumors he had heard about Sasuke's drinking problem? Why couldn't he just let it go?

And the worst thing was that he knew he couldn't. He was going to go back to their company. He would still force himself to sell it. This wouldn't be permanent. But he couldn't resist the opportunity to spend just a little more time with Sasuke. And even now, in the calm and privacy of his own home, he knew exactly where this was likely to lead and he knew it was a stupid and self-destructive path.

But when had anything about their relationship been logical? It had always been obsessive and explosive and irresistible.

Jiraya had been wrong. He was not ready to be back in Japan. He should have stayed in Spain.

-xXx-

**Wednesday**

When Sasuke came home from work that evening, he found a letter taped to his door. He took it inside, opening it as he stepped out of his shoes and set his briefcase down. He began to read. By the time he got to the end, he was white and shaking.

He pulled out his phone and dialed. "Itachi - I need Naruto's address. I know you have it."

. . . .

_Sasuke-kun_

_I know you are finally looking into the photo and the hotel ledgers. So eventually you will figure out what happened. I want you to know that by the time you read this, I have left Japan. I am going somewhere where no one has ever heard of the mighty Uchiha Sasuke, and I am going to start over and finally be happy._

_It's funny. When I had the opportunity to take that video and print a few pictures from it, at most I thought I would be able to cause a small fight between you and Naruto. I wasn't even sure that would work, because everyone knows how honest Naruto is, and how much he loved you. I figured probably you wouldn't even believe it, but was hoping it would give you at least a small taste of hurt. Like you had hurt me countless times before._

_Imagine my utter shock when you just up and divorced him, without even a discussion. I have to admit that I felt terrible for Naruto. I hadn't meant to hurt him with this. Even though he rejected me, too, I know that I had rejected him first. I know I had been terrible to him when he was growing up, in my single-minded obsession with you. And by the time I was old enough to realize that he was by far the better man, you had already claimed him. Like everything else. Whatever Uchiha Sasuke wants, he gets. And the rest of the world be damned._

_I even considered going to him and telling him what I'd done when I heard that you had actually DIVORCED him on the spot. But he was gone and no one knew where. It wouldn't have mattered anyway though. Because you would never have let him explain._

_Because finally, FINALLY, you had made a mistake. An enormous one. And even if you show this to Naruto now, the damage will be undoable. You didn't trust him enough. Anyone who knew Naruto at all would have known immediately this was a lie. Because if there is one decent human being left on this earth, it is Naruto. You were his husband, and you somehow missed that simple fact. And then your enormous pride wouldn't let him defend himself. And you made sure he knew about all the lovers you took, showing him you didn't miss him. So now it will be too late._

_And I am filled with glee. You arrogant, selfish bastard. I hope you suffer. I hope you regret. I hope you beg for his forgiveness and he squashes you. Because I want you to feel what you have made me and countless others that you deemed unworthy feel._

_I hate you, and I hope you rot in hell._

_Sakura_

-xXx-

Naruto heard a knocking on his door. It was late for unexpected company, after 9pm. Frowning, he went and opened the door. And froze.

Sasuke just stood there, looking at him. "Can we talk?"

Naruto stood there, still frozen. He had felt so emotionally exposed from yesterday's exhibit that he had literally spent the entire day just locked in his apartment, trying to regain his sense of privacy and restore his emotional equilibrium. The very last person he was prepared to talk to in this universe had shown up on his doorstep. How did Sasuke even know where he lived? But of course. This was Sasuke.

Naruto forced his brain to come up with something to say that would end this conversation as quickly and painlessly as possible. There was only one possible reason that Sasuke was here. "Look, I told Itachi that any decision to buy me out should go through Shikamaru and Gaara. I don't want to do the negotiations any other way. And if I decide to come back and train my replacements, I will work that through Kiba, not you. If you don't like who Kiba hired to replace me, then take it up with him."

"Naruto," Sasuke took a step towards the door, but Naruto didn't back away to allow him entry. "That's not what I'm here to talk about."

Anger began bubbling within Naruto. "What else could there possibly be for us to discuss, Sasuke? I think that you pretty much said all there was to say that night two years ago."

Naruto saw the flash of pain and guilt in the onyx eyes, but steeled himself against it. "It's too late now if you've decided you've become 'un-bored' with me. We both signed the fucking divorce papers that you wanted so badly. The company is the last thread and I'm _trying_ to move that along, too, but I won't do this with you directly. It's a legal matter. Let the lawyers do their jobs."

A door down the hallway opened, and one of Naruto's neighbors walked out, clearly dressed for the night club. She eyed Sasuke appreciatively, slowing her steps to see if he were going inside, or potentially leaving with her.

"I don't want to do this in the hallway. There is something I need to show you. I want to explain -"

"Fine," Naruto's eyes narrowed, and Sasuke wasn't sure if it was because he was annoyed at being somewhat forced to let him in, or annoyed at the girl who was clearly checking him out.

Naruto walked into the kitchen, leaning against the counter crossing his arms across his chest. Sasuke glanced around the apartment. It smelled of Naruto, a warm, earthy scent. Sasuke took a deep breath, trying to both fill himself with it and steel himself against its effects. As expected, the apartment was full of vibrant colors. He felt a small twist in his chest as he recognized the orange couch. There were paintings, all Naruto's, on the wall. Some were landscapes of what looked to be European cities, children playing soccer, and a tiny old man in a dojo. There were sketches - faces that Sasuke didn't recognize, but he knew must have some importance to Naruto. It hit him suddenly how much things had changed. For almost their entire lives, they had shared their friends, experiences, thoughts... there was no event that had happened in Naruto's life that Sasuke was not either a part of or at least knew about. But that had all changed, and Sasuke found it disorienting. He had stayed in the same place, with the same people, doing the same thing. Naruto had - changed.

"Nice place," Sasuke offered, trying to start the conversation in a neutral fashion while getting his bearings. So much was riding on what happened in the next ten minutes. He didn't want to fuck this up if there was any chance at all.

Naruto snorted. "Cut the shit, Sasuke. Compared to your place, I'm sure this is a dump. Just like anything of mine has always been relative to yours. Just tell me what you want and let's get this over with."

Sasuke's eyes widened at the uncharacteristically biting words from Naruto. He didn't miss the underlying sense of bitterness in the blond's voice. Naruto was clearly hoping to push Sasuke into an argument that would give him the right to throw him out and end the conversation. In the past it might have worked. Naruto had always been the only one able to get under his skin instantly like that. But too much was riding on this now. And he remembered what Itachi had said about Naruto never really understanding what Sasuke had seen in him in the first place. He had to tread lightly here.

"That's not true. I _never_ felt that way, Naruto." Sasuke let his guard down so Naruto could read the sincerity in his eyes.

Naruto searched his face for a second, then let his gaze drop, not able to trust what he saw. "Just get to the point, Sasuke. You didn't come all the way here to discuss my apartment."

Sasuke realized there was not going to be a smooth way to bring this up, so he just pulled out the folder he had brought with him and handed it to Naruto. "I received these the day after I left for Okinawa two years ago. And the letter I received this morning. I wanted you to know -" Sasuke blew out a short breath as Naruto opened the folder and saw the photos, shock evident on his face. Shock. But not guilt. "I wanted you to know why I filed for divorce. The real reason."

Naruto just stared at the photos, frozen. He flipped quickly through the hotel ledgers, then finally read the note from Sakura. The small hairs on Sasuke's arms stood up when Naruto began to laugh.

"You fucking... you _fucking bastard_!" The shift from laughing to blazing anger caused Sasuke to tense, and he forced himself not to take a step back. "God, Sakura is completely right about you. If you had just fucking _asked_ me about this. I _told_ you I had gotten food poisoning that night and -"

He snapped his head up to look Sasuke directly in the eyes, shoving the papers back at him. "You ass. You fucking _coward_! You threw away our entire marriage because you couldn't bring yourself to fucking _ask_ me-" Without warning, Naruto threw a punch that caught Sasuke directly in the jaw. Sasuke's head snapped back and he staggered a step back, but didn't even try to dodge or block it. He just stood there, arms at his sides, eyes searing into Naruto's.

"Get out," Naruto's voice was shaking with emotion.

"Naruto -"

"I said get out!" Naruto was walking towards him, his body shaking with the clear need to physically restrain himself from hitting Sasuke again. "I can't talk to you right now. I don't want to end up in jail for beating the fuck out of you if you aren't going to even defend yourself. Get out."

Sasuke hesitated, but walked to the door, opening it, knowing Naruto deserved time to sort out his own feelings. Nothing good would come of pushing him on it right now. "I'll leave for now. But we need to talk about this, Naruto. This conversation isn't over."

"It's over for tonight," Naruto said, placing a hand on Sasuke's chest and pushing him into the hall, then slamming the door, the lock snicking closed. Sasuke stood there, his jaw throbbing; he winced as he heard the sound of something loud and heavy crash against the wall and break.

This could definitely have gone better. But then again, it could have gone worse. Naruto had essentially agreed to talk to him about this again later. Sasuke was going to make sure that later was not very far away.

_-xXx-_

to be continued... **please comment!**

I know... Sakura, right? There is no complicated, sinister conspiracy here. But there is still a piece of the story missing, which will be finally revealed in the next chapter.


	5. The conversation

-xXx-

The next morning, Sasuke knocked on Naruto's door. He had told his assistant to cancel all his meetings for the day. Right now, nothing was more important than this. He wasn't going to make the same mistake twice. Two years ago he had been too afraid of the truth to talk to Naruto directly when it happened. This time, he would not give up without having everything fully out in the open. If it didn't work out, it didn't work out, but it was not going to be because he was too afraid to even try.

He knocked again. No one answered. "Naruto - we need to talk. If you're in there, open the damn door. I'm not going away until you do."

Silence. Sasuke looked up and down the hall, but no one was out. He turned the knob, and was surprised to find the door open. "Naruto, we need to talk." He repeated, and walked in to the entryway. There was no sound; no sign of anyone home at all. He noticed the broken chair against the wall and winced. He drew a breath and walked through the apartment, a little concerned that Naruto appeared not to be home, but had left the place open. "Usuratonkachi - you should be more careful."

Naruto had never been one to make his bed, so he couldn't tell from that if Naruto had spent the night here or not, but the shower was dry, and Naruto always showered when he woke up. Evidently, he had left sometime after their fight last night. Sasuke's gut clenched as he thought about where Naruto might have gone. He hoped like hell it wasn't to Yahiko. Sasuke locked Naruto's door and pulled it closed behind him.

. . .

Sasuke had looked everywhere. He had swung by the office, and asked Kiba and Shikamaru if they had seen Naruto. Their shocked expressions had indicated that they didn't even know he was back in town. Next he had tried the Onyx, but that didn't open until later in the evening. Finally he had gone to the art gallery. Naruto wasn't there, but Yahiko was. He saw Sasuke walk in, and his eyes immediately narrowed in recognition. Not friendly recognition.

Yahiko waited silently for Sasuke to walk over to him, making no move to rise or greet him. "Can I help you?" His tone made it clear he would rather help Sasuke back out the door.

"I need to find Naruto."

"Why?" Yahiko asked, completely ignoring the icy glare that Sasuke leveled at him.

"There are things he and I need to talk about," Sasuke said stiffly. He hated this. Hated having to ask someone else where Naruto was. As though anyone could ever know Naruto better than he did. He felt a dark emotion bubble in him as he looked at the pierced man in front of him.

"It's funny that you decide you need to 'talk things out' with him now, after all this time. Right when he's finally moving on."

"I don't need to explain myself to you."

"I guess that's true. I'm not Naruto's keeper. But I am his friend. And that bruise on your jaw tells me he doesn't want to talk with you."

Sasuke shrugged. "You don't know what happened." There was a question he needed to ask this man, but he was unsure he was gong to like the answer. "What are you to him?"

"I'm his friend," Yahiko said flatly.

"Friend?" Sasuke asked, sneering the word.

"Well, since you clearly already seem to know, I suppose it is no secret. We've known each other less than two months, but... after last weekend I guess you could say we're more than just friends. Not that it is any of your business any longer. Naruto doesn't talk about it, but I saw the news from two years ago. I know exactly what you did..." Yahiko smiled sadistically at Sasuke. "... and I can guess why you are trying so hard to 'talk' to him now. You must have found out by your own experience what an incredible lover he is, compared to most. I've been around, but fuck, sex with Naruto is _amazing._ I mean... talk about stamina. We went all weekend."

Sasuke clenched his fists, "Don't talk about Naruto like he's your plaything."

"What, you don't like hearing about the sexual exploits of your ex? Funny. You made fucking sure he got to hear all about yours."

Sasuke didn't drop his eyes. "And that's between Naruto and me. I'll accept his judgment. But you are just a bystander. I've been a part of Naruto's life since the beginning. You're just a bit part in this play. Don't over estimate your role."

"Don't over estimate yours," Yahiko shot back, totally unintimidated. "Don't be surprised if you go to him and he tells you to stay the fuck out of his life."

Sasuke's gut twisted. Would Naruto say that? Would it really be too late? It might be... and honestly he couldn't blame Naruto if it were. But he wasn't going to give the bastard in front of him the satisfaction of seeing his turmoil, so he kept his face carefully schooled.

"You'd better brace yourself, Sasuke. Naruto is a lot stronger now. He doesn't need you. So if you want him back, you're going to have to earn it. And honestly I don't know if you can," Yahiko wrote something down on a piece of paper and handed it to Sasuke. "But for Naruto's sake, so he can get closure, I'll tell you where to find him."

Sasuke glanced at the paper. It was an address. "It's the address of his studio. He goes there when he needs to paint. He'll be there now," Yahiko said evenly.

Sasuke nodded. He didn't really know what to say. He didn't like this man. But Yahiko had given him the address, and he hadn't needed to. In fact, it wasn't in Yahiko's own interests to do so. "Thanks."

"Don't thank me. I don't wish you luck. But I am Naruto's friend. And he wouldn't appreciate me getting in the way of his business. He's strong enough to make the call on his own." Yahiko smiled a little sadly. "Besides, Naruto was clear when we started our relationship what the boundaries were. He could never have a serious relationship with me if I also stayed with Konan. Konan and I go way back. She was there for me when no one else was, and I love her. I will never leave her. So that means Naruto and I will only really ever be just friends, even if we briefly are something more. He's not the kind of person that will accept this kind of relationship for very long. I respect that, even if I wish maybe it could have been different. We will never be more than we are right now. But he deserves someone who knows him and values him. And that clearly wasn't you. But since you have decided to crash back into his life, he needs to resolve his feelings about you before he can really move on. With someone who actually deserves him."

"You weren't there, Yahiko. You are only a recent addition to Naruto's life. Don't over-estimate your understanding of who he is or what he needs. But thanks for the address." Yahiko just looked at Sasuke, expressionless, and Sasuke turned and walked out of the gallery.

-xXx-

Naruto contemplated the canvass from the couch where he had been laying. As usual, he had pulled off his shirt while painting the night before. He was messy with his art, and didn't want to have to keep replacing his shirts he ruined every time he painted. So he had gone to sleep in his sweat pants, but nothing else. He looked at the bottle of Jack Daniels and shot glass on the floor next to him that he had brought out the night before. The bottle was still three quarters full.

Painting always helped him get out what he was feeling, and last night had been no exception. The piece looked violent, with slashes of color ripped across the canvass, and a splash where Naruto had flung a shot of Jack.

Naruto had done a lot of thinking. He had thought until his brain _hurt_. But still hadn't figured anything out. Based on what Sasuke had shown him last night, it appeared that Sasuke hadn't thrown him away for nothing. It hadn't been the selfish, cold-blooded act that Sasuke had made it out to be at the time. That had changed so many things about how Naruto felt about what had happened. How he felt about Sasuke. It meant that Sasuke actually hadn't been the heartless person that Naruto had been so destroyed by. Sasuke had hurt him, but he had done it because he himself was hurting, not because he was just a soulless fuck. So much of what had helped Naruto move on from Sasuke over the past two years had hinged on the fact that what Sasuke had done was unforgivable, that Naruto would never want him back even if Sasuke for some unknown reason changed his mind. But this changed that, and Naruto didn't know how to handle it. People make mistakes when they are hurting. It is human. It is... potentially forgivable.

But that didn't change the fact that Sasuke had utterly _destroyed_ Naruto. The humiliation and vulnerability that Naruto felt when he looked back at what he had become after Sasuke had ended things was real. Naruto thought back at how utterly pathetic he had been after the split, and felt true revulsion for himself. He never wanted to be that person again. And he wouldn't. He had rebuilt himself and was able to find peace and purpose on his own, not merely as an appendage to Sasuke's life.

So where did that leave them? _No fucking clue._ But he needed to talk to Sasuke. No matter what had happened, Sasuke deserved to know the truth. He clearly still didn't know the whole of everything that had happened the night of those photos, and he had a right to. Last night Naruto had just been unable to process anything. The idea that this had all been some horrific misunderstanding had sent him reeling. He couldn't help the bitterness that he felt knowing that this whole disaster didn't need to have happened. That the pain he had gone through could potentially have been avoided. If only Sasuke had talked to him. _If only I hadn't run away, maybe I could have made him._

But he had been in no condition to stand and fight Sasuke. Despite skipping out on the diagnosis, he knew he had had a serious mental breakdown. Probably some fancy words for depression could have been tagged on as well. He might wish he had been stronger at the time, but he knew he had barely survived as it was, and couldn't have done more. He had tried, and fought as much as he could. He would have to make his peace with that, just as Sasuke would for his own mistakes. They were both only human, and their feet of clay had tripped them both. But where that left them, he had no idea.

He thought about calling him, but knew Sasuke would be at work. This wasn't the kind of conversation to be had on the phone in an office. Should he go over to Sasuke's house? He didn't know where he lived, but Itachi would probably tell him.

He heard a knock at the door. It wasn't Yahiko's knock. He pulled his T-shirt on and walked over to the door, already knowing who it was likely to be.

Naruto opened the door, not surprised to meet onyx eyes looking back at him. Their gazes held for a moment, neither man speaking. Then Naruto breathed a small laugh and stepped back, allowing the other to enter. "Yahiko, you fucking Judas," Naruto mumbled, knowing who must have given Sasuke this address. But there was no heat behind the words and Sasuke smiled slightly at their sound.

Sasuke was carrying two paper cups, and offered one to Naruto. "Milk and sugar with a little coffee."

"Thanks," Naruto accepted it with a somewhat awkward smile. He looked at the cup that Sasuke was holding, knowing it would be green tea with nothing added. The familiar gesture seemed oddly intimate and comforting. How many times had they brought each other coffee or tea in the past? It made Naruto's heart twist just a little. So much wasted time and needless pain. Naruto thought about what Sasuke must be feeling, coming to him with what he knew, and what had happened. He searched the man's face, wincing as he saw the purpling bruise along the pale jawline.

"Um... sorry. About last night. I just... lost it." Naruto brushed a finger and gently along the bruise. Something flashed in Sasuke's eyes, but was gone before Naruto could read it.

Sasuke shrugged, pulling back slightly and rubbing his jaw. "It wasn't unexpected. Or undeserved. But I have to say, you punch a hell of a lot harder than you did when we were kids."

The guilt didn't leave Naruto's face. "Yeah. I took up kung fu when I was in Andalusia. Sifu Shima would kick my ass if he knew I'd hit someone for anything other than self defense." They were standing close.

"Is he the guy in the dojo painting in your apartment?" Sasuke asked.

"Yeah... he's really amazing. He is like half my size but could totally kick my ass around the block and back," Naruto grinned, rubbing the back of his head. The expression and gesture were so familiar to Sasuke that he felt his throat tighten.

"You left your apartment unlocked. I went looking for you, and found it open. I locked it when I left, though."

"Yeah, thanks. I was kind of a mess when I left last night and came here. I guess I must have forgotten."

"Hn."

Neither man really knew what to say. Naruto took a sip of his coffee. "Um... why don't you come and sit down. There's not much for furniture here, but..."

"Thanks," Sasuke went and sat on the couch. Naruto sat at the other end, facing him, but not in touching distance. They just looked at each other for a while.

The awkward silence began to stretch

"Fuck this," Naruto said, taking a big drink of his coffee, then opening the lid and pouring some whiskey into it. He didn't care that it was only about 2 in the afternoon. He offered the bottle to Sasuke, who declined to pour it into his tea but instead just took a drink from the bottle. Naruto drank from his spiked coffee, and made a face at the taste. Suddenly remembering what Itachi had said about Sasuke's drinking problem, Naruto looked guiltily at his friend.

"Sorry... I forgot. Is it ok for you to be drinking?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "I wasn't an alcoholic. I stopped drinking a month ago with no problem." Naruto looked at him, knowing there was more to be said on this but also knowing that this topic was not really the place to start. They would get to all the shit they had gone through soon enough. But first they needed to talk about what had set the whole thing in motion in the first place. Naruto took another drink. Never one to hesitate, Naruto blew out a breath, and dove right in.

"So... it's funny in a way. The photos that Sakura sent," Naruto was scratching the back of his head, aware that Sasuke had gone completely still, waiting. "I guess, looking at just these frames, it looks pretty bad. But it was about as far from a threesome as you could possibly get. That night, the night you left for the meetings in Okinawa?"

Sasuke nodded, but didn't say anything. He took a drink, eyes locked on Naruto.

"Right, so you and I had promised to attend the benefit for the new children's wing at the hospital. But since the Okinawa meeting had cropped up, I had to go by myself," Naruto had always hated these black tie events. They had argued about it before, Naruto asking why they couldn't just write a fucking check and put it in the mail. But Sasuke had explained that it was important to be there to show support in person, and build relationships. So Naruto had agreed to go. "Well, we had gone through half of the speeches and they were serving the dinner. And there were all kinds of foods there, including some chicken sashimi that no one wanted to eat. But I figured, with all the money being spent on this, it should be fine, right? So, I had some. But most people passed... it was really gross looking. I mean, who eats raw chicken? The event was $200 a plate, and they couldn't even cook the fucking chicken?"

Sasuke would have laughed under other circumstances, but he was waiting for Naruto to get to the important part, about how he had gone from dining at a benefit to being naked in bed with two women. Naruto rolled his shoulders, feeling the weight of the other man's look, and knowing that he need to be very clear on exactly what had happened. And what hadn't. Naruto decided his coffee wasn't strong enough for this conversation, and grabbed the bottle, looking at it a moment, then took a drink.

"Anyway, a little bit after eating dinner, I started to not feel so great. Hinata was sitting next to me," Sasuke's eyes narrowed sharply at that. He had never liked Hinata. She had followed Naruto around since they were children. Sasuke grabbed the bottle back and took a drink. "So I told her that I was going to go home early. I had already given the check to hospital, and you know how I hate wearing a stupid tux, so I was pretty glad to escape. I drove home, and was feeling worse by the time I got there, so I laid down on the couch. I heard my phone ring, but I was feeling so sick I didn't want to move. About 20 minutes later, the doorbell rang. I almost didn't answer it, because I was feeling like crap, but then there was a knocking at the door and Sakura's voice saying that they had just taken five people to the hospital with food poisoning from the benefit and did I eat the chicken sashimi. Hinata had told Sakura that I had left early and was feeling sick, and they had tried to call but were nervous when I didn't answer. They knew you were out of town, so they came over to check on me."

"And... so I got up, and opened the door and..." Naruto blushed and laughed a little. Sasuke narrowed his eyes, and he was just about to take another drink when Naruto continued. "... and I projectile vomited all over the both of them."

Naruto looked directly at Sasuke with a sheepish, lopsided grin. "I mean like full-on Exorcist style vomiting. It was... god awful. And poor Hinata was the closest, so it was just...god, in her hair, and all over her dress. Sakura was standing to the side so she just got, um.. splattered?"

Sasuke just looked at him, bottle paused almost to his lips, taking in how the vision he had had in his mind of a torrid affair had suddenly vanished into a scene of projectile vomit. "So the reason they were naked was..."

"Yeah, because I puked all over them. Ruined both their expensive dresses. Not exactly foreplay. It was fucking disgusting. And embarrassing. I don't think I'd ever had the stomach flu before in my entire life, at least not that I remember. I mean, I almost never get sick, you know? But I was in total agony. It felt like my body was trying to eject my stomach. Hinata went to wash up... she would have had to take a shower to clean her hair off. Sakura helped me to the guest bathroom, since it was closer, where I was basically just kneeling in front of the toilet puking my guts out. She went and cleaned up the mess in the entryway. I guess that must have been when she got the idea to do this and set up her camera. I told her to find some T-shirts and sweats for her and Hinata to use, and she said she was going to call the hospital and get an ambulance for me. I had a fever of like 104 by that point, and just basically wanted to die. My shirt was a mess. At least I had taken off the jacket and tie as soon as I had left the building, so they were fine but... ugh. She said it was better for me to get off the cold bathroom floor and lay down in the bed until the paramedics got to me because of the fever. She helped me get my shirt off since it was disgusting, and threw her dress directly into the trash. I told her where some clean clothes were that she could borrow so she wouldn't be half naked when the ambulance showed up. I was so dizzy from the fever and puking that she had to help me to the bed. Hinata was just coming out of the shower and Sakura called her over to help, asking her to bring the garbage can because I still felt like I was going to lose it again, despite not much being left in my stomach. They guided me to the bed and I just basically continued to puke in the bucket until the paramedics got there. The first picture was just the two of them helping me into bed. If you look closely, you can actually see the rim of the garbage can next to me on the floor. My whole body was just shaking, and I was trying really hard not to throw up on them a second time. Although, I have to say, after reading Sakura's note I really wish I had just spewed all over her."

Sasuke barked out a short laugh. God, this was not at all how he had imagined this story playing out. Naruto grabbed the bottle, just swirling the liquid for a moment, then taking a small drink.

"Anyway, my stomach was cramping up a lot. Sakura said something about checking to be sure I didn't have appendicitis. Honestly that didn't make any sense to me at the time, given that we knew I had just eaten something that had give at least five other people food poisoning, but I had been puking my guts out and she was a doctor and Hinata and I just didn't really think about it. She climbed up on the bed, saying she didn't want to be too close to the bucket, and put her ear to my stomach for a few seconds supposedly to see if she could hear anything strange from the appendix, then proclaimed my appendix fine and she and Hinata went and changed clothes. That must have been the footage that she pulled the second photo from, just before she turned her head to put her ear to my stomach. I'm sure she did that on purpose, knowing it would really look like she was giving me head in that frame, but I had my pants on, and... fuck. I was on the bed with them in the room for a total of less than two minutes. Sakura must have gone through the footage frame by frame to find something to use that looked questionable. And I never considered this event as a possible reason for you leaving, because it was about as far from sex as you could get. The whole room smelled like vomit, I was in agony, and we were just waiting for the ambulance. God, Hinata is going to die of embarrassment when she see's these photos. You know what a prude she is."

Sasuke felt his whole world shifting as the reality of what had actually happened soaked in. And the enormity of the mistake he had made was like a gaping whole waiting to swallow him up. He took a long drink, willing there to be some way to fix this.

Naruto blew out a breath. "The paramedics came and I spent the next two days in the hospital. I'm sure they still have records of the call and the two days I spent the hospital, if you need to check." Sasuke flinched at the words. Naruto's tone had hardened a bit, the bitterness seeping through.

"I told Sakura to call you and let you know that I was in the hospital. I was still puking and hooked up to IV and didn't want to try a phone. Plus I figured that since she was a doctor, and you always worry so much, she'd be able to answer all your questions. I was a little annoyed that you didn't call me or come back early, but I'm guessing she never called you in the first place." Sasuke could hear the hurt in Naruto's voice and he bled from it, regret almost overwhelming him.

"No. I never heard anything until the message you left the next morning telling me that you were feeling better and not to worry. But by then, I had already received the package from Sakura, so... I never called you back." There was real regret in Sasuke's voice. Naruto almost never got sick, and the one time he had been seriously ill, Sasuke hadn't been there for him. Naruto felt a flash of anger, even knowing that his friend had suffered, too.

"Why _didn't_ you call me, Sasuke? Why didn't you talk to me about this? Confront me with it?"

Sasuke looked at Naruto, pain and regret etched across his face. "Do you think I haven't asked myself that question a million fucking times? God, what I wouldn't give to go back and undo that one thing. Just that one little decision." His gaze faltered then, and he looked down.

"But I just... I just didn't know what to do. Anything else. God, I could lose anything else. But you were all I had left that mattered. My parents were dead, Itachi was in a coma. There was no one else that I trusted, no one who really knew me, besides you. And the thought of you cheating, the thought of me not being enough for you anymore, I just... it... I couldn't face it. I didn't know how to handle it." Sasuke took the bottle and took a long drink, and drew a shuddering breath. "I thought, if I took these pictures to you, and it was some kind of trick, you'd be furious at me for doubting you. And if it were real, would I let you talk me into thinking it was a trick just because that was what I so desperately wanted to believe? So I thought I would look into it first. There was a film guy in Okinawa that I happened to know who had done work for Itachi authenticating some photos a while back. I called him and had him look at the pictures to see if this was just someone doing some good cut and paste with kinky pictures. While he was analyzing them, I went to each of the hotels there and talked to anyone who was still on the staff who remembered you and Hinata and Sakura. They confirmed that you had been there. With them."

Sasuke paused here, a question clearly implied.

Naruto sighed, and reached for the bottle. "I should have told you about Hinata and Sakura." Sasuke felt his stomach clench. What did Naruto mean by that?

"Hinata had... liked me... for a really long time. Ever since we were kids. You know that, of course. It's why you won't even talk to her." Sasuke's eyes locked on Naruto, watching as the blond took a drink. "But I never saw her that way. She was so sweet, and so nice, and I don't know why but..." Naruto laughed a little self-consciously. "All I ever saw was you. There was never a chance for anyone else. With us, there's this challenge. This friction. It just... she's the polar opposite of you. I could never see her as anything more than a friend."

Sasuke knew that what Naruto said was true. Even when they were little, Naruto and Sasuke had fixated on each other. The usually stoic Uchiha flaring up and getting into verbal and physical fights with the Uzumaki boy. And the normally friendly blond was hostile and provocative to the pale black-haired boy. It had begun literally they day they had met in grade school, an instant chemical reaction. And as they had matured, that chemistry had only grown. Two alpha males, constantly butting against each other, that friction the foundation of a heat between them that only grew into an inferno when they had reached puberty. Sasuke thought about this, and thought about Hinata. And realized that the poor girl never had a chance. She was not Naruto's type. He blew out a small snort of laughter at his own blind insecurity. But one of the ties that had bound them together had always been that they were each other's first friends. Naruto had been a grubby orphan, loud and unmannered, and Sasuke had been withdrawn and 'stuck up'. And somehow, they had formed a bond with each other, forcing their way inside each others' walls.

But in truth, Hinata had been the first to truly see Naruto's value. She had loved Naruto from the very beginning. While Sasuke was still focused on the rivalry, not aware yet of his deeper feelings, Hinata had always seen the value in Naruto. And Sasuke had always feared that one day Naruto would wake up and realize that Hinata had actually been his first friend, but she had been too shy to express it. Naruto had been oblivious and hadn't realized it until years later. But Sasuke had always felt threatened by Hinata, much more so than Sakura, whom Naruto had had a crush on briefly in middle school. Sakura had always been cruel to Naruto when they were growing up. And Sasuke had known that, deep down, Naruto could never really love someone as selfish as Sakura. He had chalked up Naruto's brief fascination with her to their rivalry. Sakura had wanted Sasuke. So Naruto had wanted Sakura to notice him as well, as a sign that he was Sasuke's equal in all things. He had never viewed her as a real threat.

"I was on that business trip to Tokyo to talk with the new prospective advertising agency that we had been thinking of hiring. I had gone down to dinner at the hotel after the meeting, and was surprised to see Hinata there. She acted surprised to see me, but I could tell something was off. I asked her to join me for dinner, and we talked for a while. She asked about you, about our marriage and how things were going. I told here they were great. She looked down, and I realized she had been hoping for a different answer. I told her that I knew she was uncomfortable around you, but that we could still be friends. I told her I'd invite her over to our house for dinner sometime," Sasuke narrowed his eyes at that. He still didn't like her. Naruto saw the expression and just rolled his eyes. "I asked her what she was doing here, and she said she was meeting a friend in town. I didn't push it further, and it had been a long day so I just went to bed. Alone." Naruto looked pointedly at Sasuke, who just nodded.

"I didn't tell you about it because I knew you didn't like her and wouldn't give a flying fuck if Hinata were meeting a friend in Tokyo. At that point, I thought that was all it was. I invited her over to dinner, but she didn't come," Sasuke remembered that. He had been annoyed that Naruto had invited her, then relieved that she hadn't come. Naruto sighed, looking uncomfortable.

"But then two weeks later when I was in Tokyo again to finalize the contract with the agency, she was there. And even I realized that this couldn't be a coincidence. She admitted it, admitted that she knew you didn't like her and she didn't want to cause problems between us, but she just had missed talking to me and thought since she knew I would be here, she would be able to talk to me without being a bother. Those were her words."

"So what happened then?"

"I told her that I didn't mind if you got a little pissy when she came to our house for dinner. I told her you had friends that I don't like much, and you make me entertain them, and that I valued her as a friend. But I told her that it was not right for her to try to meet with me secretly, and it could not happen again. She was embarrassed, of course, and that was the end of it. She never tried to meet with me again when you weren't around. She never tried to kiss me, or anything like that in either of these meetings. She just really seemed to want to talk."

Sasuke didn't comment on Naruto's incredible naïveté. "And Sakura?"

Naruto sighed, scrubbing his hands across his face. His head was feeling a little light from the alcohol. Sasuke seemed unaffected, but then again he had a hell of a lot more practice holding his liquor. "Sakura was different. She showed up several times while I was at meetings, both in town and out of town. Mostly she was just running you down, telling me how selfish she thought you were, about all the women who were still throwing themselves at you and how you didn't seem to try too hard to keep them away." Sasuke rolled his eyes at that. He had tried everything short of punching them in the face to keep his fangirls away, but nothing seemed to work. Naruto smirked briefly, clearly reading Sasuke's thoughts and agreeing. "I got really annoyed at her, and told her that if she still carried all this jealousy and bitterness for you that our friendship was over. She seemed honestly shocked. I don't really know what she was trying to do. I know it says here that she was pursuing me, but honestly it felt more like she was just trying to break us up. She has always been obsessed with you. In middle school, when I thought I liked her, she was just as cruel to me as you had been to her. It's hard to imagine her actually liking me romantically." In fact, one of the main reasons Sasuke had been particularly cruel to Sakura when they were younger had been the way she treated Naruto... constantly running him down and cruelly rejecting even his overtures of friendship. Sasuke had thought she was a selfish, heartless bitch at the time. She had seemed to mature and become nicer as they had grown up, but Sasuke now decided that his first impression of her had been the correct one.

Naruto was continuing. "I should have told you, but it was just after Itachi's accident and you were so under water between handling your own emotions, dealing with the medical decisions, and trying to take over the family business and get up to speed on everything. I didn't want to add to the stress and I thought I could handle her. I was taking over most of the meetings and trips for our business to take things off your plate, so she had plenty of opportunities to find me alone. I told her there was no chance, and that she had to stop harassing me. It lasted about three weeks, then she finally got the message. I really thought it was done. I had no idea she would ever be capable of something like this. I mean, I know she never got over you, never forgave you for not loving her back and rejecting her so many times. Especially rejecting her for me, but this... God, Sasuke. I can't believe she did this."

Sasuke sat there, trying to process everything he had heard. He believed Naruto. There was no question. Yes, Naruto should have told him these things, but he understood why he hadn't. Didn't blame him. Part of him felt an incredible relief that the hellish reality of Naruto cheating on him, of not being enough to hold the one person who mattered to him, was not true. Naruto had never betrayed him. But then...

Sasuke leaned forward, his head in his hands. Memories of that last night together crashed into him. Memories of Naruto, destroyed. Crying. Broken. Because of him. And how could he take that back? How could he make that right?

"God, Naruto -" Sasuke didn't know what to say. How could there be anything to say? What kind of words could erase actions that he had meant to be as hurtful as possible?

He looked into the eyes of his friend, searching them for some clue, some cue for what he should do next. "I'm sorry. Naruto - please... tell me what I can do to make this right. I... I saw your paintings at the gallery, and god, I -"

"Stop. Don't." Naruto stood, his face closed. "I don't want to talk about that, Sasuke."

Naruto stood abruptly and walked over to the canvass he was working on, staring at it blankly. He didn't want to talk about that time. The utter pathetic waste he had been... he didn't want Sasuke to see that. He didn't want _himself_ to see that. It had been the absolute lowest point in his life, and his weakest. He felt disgusted with the person he had been at that time.

Sasuke felt at sea... Naruto had always worn his heart on his sleeve, his emotions there for all to read. With Sasuke especially, there had been no barriers. Naruto would come to him with whatever problem he had, big or small, and pour everything out about it. And Sasuke would either roll his eyes and say something biting to snap him out of it, or would quietly listen and let Naruto purge himself of his turmoil, then offer advice. Either way, Sasuke always tried to fix whatever was bothering his friend. But this time it was Sasuke himself who was the cause of his friend's agony. And Naruto clearly did not want to talk to him about it, not that part at least. Sasuke knew why. Expected it. Understood it. Even deserved it. But God, it hurt like hell. He sat there, looking at the back of the only person he had ever loved, ever would love, desperately trying to think of what to say.

"Are you hungry?" Naruto asked abruptly. "I don't have food here, but... we could order something."

Sasuke wasn't hungry, but he didn't want to leave, and didn't know what to say, so he just nodded. He knew Naruto was as much at a loss for how to handle this as he was. But at least he wasn't asking Sasuke to leave. "Sure. Anything is fine."

"There is a decent Thai place nearby. Do you still avoid spicy?" Sasuke was shocked that Naruto hadn't suggested ramen. It seemed... wrong.

"I'll eat whatever," Sasuke said.

Naruto rolled his eyes, and called in an order. Sasuke heard him order something extra hot that he had never even heard of, and then Naruto asked for something extra mild for people with wimpy mouths.

While Naruto had been on the phone, Sasuke took the opportunity to look around the studio. It was lined with canvasses, some blank and many filled. This was where the pieces were the Naruto had not felt comfortable displaying. Many were of Sasuke... pictures of how he had looked that night. Sasuke was standing in front of one of his portraits, silent.

Naruto decided he didn't want to go over and talk to Sasuke about what the painting showed. It was all too raw for him. Instead, he went back and started working on the piece he had started the night before. As his anger had softened, he softened some of the lines around the edges of the piece, mixing in some blue in one of the corners. After a few minutes, he felt Sasuke behind him. Naruto remembered how Sasuke would sometimes come in when Naruto was painting. He would watch for a while, then suddenly Naruto would feel an arm snake around his naked torso, and Sasuke would pull him tight against him, letting him feel his arousal. More than one of Sasuke's expensive business shirts had been ruined by stains from oil paint that way. And from popped buttons and torn seams, depending on their urgency.

Naruto felt his body reacting to the memories, and he had to literally force himself not to turn to Sasuke. He felt so confused about what he was supposed to feel, what he was supposed to do. Sasuke had been his best friend and lover for almost all of his adult life. And now the reason it had all ended between them had come unraveled, seeming to open some kind of path to bringing them back together. But so much had happened, so much had changed. Who he was as a person, at his core, was different now. But his desire for this man, this one person above all else, that had not changed. He could feel the heat of Sasuke's gaze on him, and knew, without looking, that there would be desire in his eyes if he turned and met them now.

He jumped when the doorbell rang. "Shit," he mumbled. He thought he heard a soft chuckle from behind him, but didn't turn to see. He wiped his hands on a cloth and went to answer the door. The delivery man greeted him, and asked what he was working on today. Clearly Naruto was a regular of his. The man's eyes widened slightly when he noticed Sasuke, and they flicked to the wall where several portraits were resting. Evidently he recognized him from Naruto's paintings. Sasuke flinched a bit at what the man must think of him.

Naruto chatted briefly with the man, as he paid him, then closed the door.

"Dinner," Naruto said, unpacking the food on the floor in front of the couch. "Sorry... no table here. We'll have to just eat on the floor."

"I've eaten in worse places," Sasuke said conversationally, and Naruto's mind was immediately plunged into yet another memory from their past. When they had been building their house, and had finally finished construction of the exterior. Naruto and Sasuke had spent the day walking through, deciding on things like fixtures and flooring, getting a feel for the space. When the contractor had gone home, they had not wanted to leave, enjoying the feel of what would be their home for the first time. They had ordered dinner, and eaten it in the barren floor of what would become their bedroom. And thoughts of nights to come in that space had lit a fire in them, and they had christened the room that night in display of torrid passion. Both having splinters from the unfinished floor by morning, but neither caring. Naruto had to tamp down on the feelings that surged through him at the memory, remembering how different that first night in their room had been compared to their last. And how he hated it for breaking.

Naruto handed Sasuke his dish, then opened his own. Snapping the wooden chopsticks in half, he dug in. Sasuke was impressed at the fiery red color of the food Naruto was downing. He was also enjoying the flush of red that the spicy food brought to Naruto's lips, complimenting the flush to his cheeks that the whiskey had created earlier. He tried not to focus on Naruto's lips. Tried not to think about whether they would taste spicy if he licked them. He was still feeling slightly buzzed, and he knew that his judgment was probably not great right now. He tried to focus on eating his own food, and keeping his hands to himself. Things were not fixed between him and Naruto. He knew that. But they were no longer completely broken either. And he had no idea how to navigate this territory.

They ate in silence for a bit, not sure exactly what to talk about, and both nervous about putting a foot wrong and destroying the tentative mending that had been achieved so far.

"Is that as hot as it looks?" Sasuke asked, pointing with his chopsticks.

"Try it," Naruto took a small piece of bean sprout and chicken in his chopsticks and offered it to Sasuke. Sasuke froze at the intimate gesture, and Naruto flushed as he realized the old habit he had unintentionally fallen into.

"Sorry," Naruto mumbled, but as he began to retract his hand, Sasuke's hand shot out and grabbed his wrist, guiding the food to his mouth. Naruto felt his breath hitch, and saw an answering darkening in Sasuke's onyx eyes. But the intimacy of the moment was gone when Sasuke began to cough and his eyes began to water.

"Shit! How do you eat this!" He gasped, looking for something to drink. He grabbed his now cold green tea and drank it down.

Naruto was laughing. "Too hot for you Sasuke?"

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, but the corners of his mouth turned up slightly. "Dobe," he said under his breath.

At the sound of the old nickname, Naruto felt a wave of pain wash over him. He looked away, but not before Sasuke saw the emotion that seared through his eyes.

Naruto put his chopsticks in the box and closed it up, not able to eat anymore past the lump in his throat, despite only having eaten half his food. Sasuke followed suit, and they sat in silence for a while. Both wanting to talk about this, wanting to know what the other was thinking and feeling, but neither able to find the right words or sufficient courage to do so. The longing between them was a living thing, overpowered only by the uncertainty and fear that the past two years had wrought within them. What did they want to happen between them now, after so much damage, but so much love?

Naruto floundered for something to say to bring back the easy atmosphere that had been there a moment before.

"It was really good to see Itachi. I could hardly believe it when I heard that he was back running the company within a week of getting out of the hospital."

Sasuke smiled slightly. "He's Itachi. He can do anything." Naruto knew that Sasuke truly meant that. It had been in a way the hardest part of Itachi's coma for Sasuke... seeing his invincible brother taken down by a stupid drunk driver. The driver had died in the crash, leaving no outlet for Sasuke's anger and helplessness. Naruto had been the only thing that had seen him through that time. And then he had lost Naruto as well.

"Yeah," Naruto said softly. He wanted to reach out and touch Sasuke's hand, to comfort him in some way, but he didn't know if he should. Sasuke had always been a very private person, and he hated casual touches. Naruto had always ignored that and invaded Sasuke's personal space anyway. But now... he just didn't know how to act. He gave a small smile instead, hoping to convey his feelings that way. "It must have been hard on you. The past two years. But I'm glad you have Itachi back now."

Sasuke looked at Naruto, trying to read his face. Was he saying that they wouldn't be together, that he was glad Itachi was there because Naruto wouldn't be?

"I missed you," Sasuke said quietly. "Even when I thought... that you had cheated. I still missed you."

"Sasuke..." Naruto faced Sasuke fully, understanding what that admission of weakness must have cost Sasuke. Wanting to show him that there was no need to doubt what they had had together. "There was no one else ever in our marriage, or even before. I loved you so much... I didn't even have room for myself. There was only ever you..."

Unable to stop himself, Sasuke reached a hand out, wrapping his pale fingers around the back of Naruto's neck and drawing his face down. A look of something almost like fear flashed across Naruto's eyes, and Sasuke hesitated. But Naruto closed the gap, brushing his lips gently across Sasuke's. They breathed into each other, their uncertainty blending with the simple need to touch again after so long apart, the torn edges seeking to find the missing pieces and be made whole again.

The tentative nature of the kiss shifted almost immediately, as their bodies recognized the familiar taste and texture that had been absent for too long. Sasuke pushed the food trays out of the way and pressed Naruto down to the floor, his fingers fisting in the blond hair as their mouths fused together. Their bodies slid together, and the sudden contact caused them both to gasp. It was a heat that they only found in each other... no one else stirred this in them. After two years, the intensity of it slammed through them both unexpectedly.

Their hands fisted into each other's hair, and their tongues searched the familiar caverns of each other's mouths. Neither had the ability to think through what they were doing. They were just reacting, caught in the familiar vortex that each created for the other whenever they were near.

Naruto groaned and Sasuke arched up, shuddering, his brain focused only where he could feel the hardness of their cocks rubbing against each other through the fabric of their jeans. A half thought flashed across Sasuke's mind, and before he could even process it his hands were in motion, sliding under Naruto's shirt, almost ripping it off him. Panting for breath, he looking at the tattoo that swirled around his lover's abdomen. He felt his cock twitch at the sight of it, and before he even knew what he was going to do he was licking and sucking, following the lines of the pattern around the hard muscles it was etched across.

Naruto sat up, breathing hard but pulling away. Sasuke almost fell over as he tried to follow him. "Wait." Naruto's voice sounded confused and shaky.

"What?" Sasuke asked, breathlessly.

"Wait... we... wait," Naruto said, panting and slowly shaking his head as if to clear it.

Sasuke tried to get his mind to clear with too much blood focused in other parts of his body, realizing with a sinking feeling that he had made another mistake, pushing this too fast. His hands shook with the effort to stop himself from reaching out to touch his lover, to make Naruto his again on that most basic level.

"Naruto?" Sasuke looked at him, his eyes dark with passion, fighting for restraint.

"We can't... I just... protection."

Sasuke just blinked. "What?"

"Protection. Do you have a condom on you? I don't have any... I've never... brought anyone here, or anything. I don't..." Naruto trailed off.

"No, but we never used them before so..." Sasuke looked questioningly at Naruto, then felt his face flush as he realized the implications of what Naruto was saying. "What the fuck, Naruto?"

"Look, Sasuke, a lot has changed since then. You... have been with a lot of people. We can't... we can't have unprotected sex."

"What?" Sasuke said again, annoyed that he kept repeating himself, trying to get his brain back to functioning. He felt a stab of hurt at Naruto's words. He understood them, on a rational level. But emotionally, he felt rejected, and knew that in fact he had been.

"This was... a bad idea. Sasuke, we're not ready for this yet."

Sasuke felt his temper flash as he automatically reacted to cover the sting of Naruto's rejection. "I get it. This is about getting even with me." Sasuke heard the bitterness escaping, but wasn't able to stop it.

"Even? Getting _even_? Sasuke, this isn't a game where we're keeping score. If it were, I'd clearly be losing. I mean, I've only slept with one other person besides you in my entire life. How about you, huh? If you want me to make us _even_ why don't you tell me how many people you fucked after you threw me out and I'll go catch up."

Sasuke couldn't help the growl that escaped. It was an empty threat, and Sasuke knew it... Naruto would never use people like that. But the words still ate into him like acid, and he couldn't hold back his visceral response. "Don't you fucking _dare_."

Naruto narrowed his eyes, the anger of all the hurt bubbling back up, even though he tried to fight it down. "You don't get to call the shots anymore, Sasuke. We're not married anymore, remember? Just like you wanted. You don't get to come in here now and dictate what's going to happen."

Sasuke knew he needed to get himself under control. If he ever wanted to rebuild what he had with Naruto, he had to stop this spiral right now. He took a deep breath. "You're right, in part. I don't have the right anymore to tell you what to do."

Naruto blinked in surprise of this unexpectedly rapid capitulation from Sasuke. Generally, their pattern would be to escalate to the breaking point. But Sasuke was fighting this, and Naruto realized it was because he really was sorry. Sasuke wanted to re-tie the bonds, not incinerate them. And Naruto realized that he did, too, though the thought of doing so scared the shit out of him. He had no idea if he could stay a separate person if he was back in Sasuke's life. Sasuke was just so... overwhelming. So larger than life. And Naruto had always been consumed by his obsession with him. An obsession that hadn't faded over the past two years. Could he risk it? Could he risk disappearing again into the life of his lover? Was he now strong enough to hold his own as an equal in a relationship with Sasuke... maintaining his own identity? He honestly didn't know. But looking at the open and vulnerable face of the man in front of him, he knew he didn't have a choice. He had never been able to refuse Sasuke anything. Who was he kidding to think he could start now.

Naruto blew out a breath. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to lash out at you. I just... am still processing everything I guess. I'm not trying to jerk you around. I am just a little overwhelmed right now, I guess."

Sasuke nodded. He knew that Naruto was still angry about Sasuke's post break-up activities. It had been more than a year since Sasuke had slept with anyone, but it didn't erase what had happened, and he knew that Naruto would take time to work through it. At least he hoped they could work through it.

He wondered how to ask about Yahiko, and whether Naruto would continue to see the man. Did he have a right to ask? Could he bear not to? "So... where are we?"

"I don't know," Naruto looked torn, and unhappy. Sasuke wished he knew the perfect thing to say to erase all the doubts and hurts, but he knew there wasn't anything.

"I should go. I think we both need time to think through everything," Sasuke got up, picking up their dinner and looking for a place to put it. Naruto took it, and set it on the couch, then walked Sasuke towards to the door.

They stood there, not sure if they should kiss goodbye, shake hands, or just... say 'see you later'.

"I'll call Kiba tomorrow morning, and come by. Maybe... I could meet you for lunch?" Naruto seemed nervous.

"Lunch would be great," Sasuke opened the door, and paused, looking the blond squarely in the eye. "But you're wrong about one thing you said, Naruto. I never filed the final divorce papers. We're still married."

-xXx-

to be continued - **please comment!**


	6. The first day back

-xXx-

_"I'll call Kiba tomorrow morning, and come by. Maybe... I could meet you for lunch?"_

_"Lunch would be great," Sasuke opened the door, and paused, looking the blond squarely in the eye. "But you're wrong about one thing you said, Naruto. I never filed the final divorce papers. We're still married."_

Naruto lay in his bed, the words replaying through his head over and over again. He still didn't know how to react to them. When Sasuke had left with that parting salvo, Naruto had just stood there like he had been shot between the eyes. Sasuke had smirked, then closed the door softly behind him. Naruto had no idea how long he had just stood there staring at the closed door. He was a little concerned that it might have been more than an hour.

He wasn't quite sure how he had managed to take the bus back to his apartment and gotten off at the right stop. He hadn't bought a car yet, since he had only been back a short while and hadn't been totally sure he would be staying. It was probably for the best that he hadn't driven anywhere tonight, his mind being the complete mess that it was.

_Still married?_

If he had to be honest with himself, his first reaction had been a surge of pure possessiveness. _Mine._ Sasuke was still his, at least legally. And just how stupid was that for a reaction? But it was immediately followed up with several other thoughts. Like - what does this mean they are to each other now? And what the fuck had Gaara been doing, not telling him this? And what did that make Naruto, when he had slept with Yahiko and was still married to Sasuke? Naruto had taken their vows seriously, even if he thought for two years that Sasuke didn't. Naruto would never have slept with Yahiko if he had thought they were still married. Never. It didn't matter what Sasuke had done. Naruto had his own moral bar, and he had held to it. He thought. But now...

But that was stupid. He had signed the papers, and just because the state hadn't recognized the divorce, it didn't really change things. He had put in writing that he viewed himself as no longer married. And so had Sasuke. The rational part of Naruto knew that it wasn't cheating, and that Sasuke wouldn't view it as such. To be honest, Naruto didn't even view Sasuke's affairs as cheating, really. Sasuke had already told him in no uncertain terms that their relationship was over, and had given Naruto the divorce papers before he had slept with anyone else. In Naruto's mind, cheating meant that you told a person you would be faithful, and then you weren't. Cheating was not breaking up with someone, filing for divorce, then immediately having sex with other people. That was being an asshole. But not a cheater.

He lay there, looking at the ceiling and trying to figure out what he needed to do. After spending two years keeping everyone at arms length and avoiding almost all ties with his old life, he was suddenly thrown back into total immersion. He needed to call Shikamaru and Kiba, and let them know he would be coming by tomorrow. With Suigetsu working there, he was sure they had already heard he was back in town. It was already getting pretty late, so he should do that soon. Then he needed to call Gaara, and chew his ass out for not telling him that he was still married. Since Gaara never slept much, he didn't need to hurry up with that.

Next he should probably warn Hinata, but he would do that tomorrow, since it was so late. She might completely pass out if Sasuke confronted her with the sordid photos and she had no advance warning. He wasn't sure Sasuke would even bother, now that he knew the truth, but he couldn't be sure and didn't want Hinata taken by surprise with it all. Especially not by Sasuke, since she had always been so uncomfortable around him. She had not done anything wrong, really. When he had told her to stop, she had.

Yahiko had left him a message, just wanting to know how he was doing. He was supposed to have met him at the Onyx tonight, but wasn't up to it. Especially not now that he would have a full day starting with an early morning tomorrow. He'd sent him a text saying he wouldn't make it tonight. He'd have to talk to Yahiko tomorrow though. He'd meet him at the club. And tell him he was still married, at least for now. Yahiko would know what that meant for Naruto. It would mean they were back to being just friends. Naruto liked Yahiko, but the thought of not being lovers anymore didn't bother him. He supposed it should, but he had always known it was not serious between them. And had been up front with Yahiko about it as well.

After two years of going entire weeks without talking to anyone, he was feeling a little overwhelmed by the sudden flood of socializing he needed to do. He picked up his phone. He still knew Shikamaru's number by heart from being the man's friend for more than a decade. "Hey, Shika. It's Naruto."

_"Naruto! I just heard you were back this past week. Where the hell have you been? Where are you staying now?"_

"I've got an apartment in town. I just got back a few -"

" _What's the address? I'm coming over."_

"You don't need to do that. It's late, and I know you have work tomorrow -"

Naruto heard the familiar sound of Shikamaru sighing. " _Don't be troublesome. I haven't seen one of my best friends in over two years, and the last time I saw you, you were in the middle of a major breakdown. Just give me the address."_

Naruto smiled. He had been somehow worried that Shikamaru would have been swayed by Sasuke while he was gone and maybe wouldn't be so glad to see him. But he should have known better. Shikamaru was the smartest person Naruto had ever met, but his intelligence wasn't just the book smart kind. Shika had a strong mind and an ability to read people and situations. No one could convince that man of something that he didn't know to be the truth with his own mind. Naruto gave him the address of his flat, and Shikamaru - never one to mince words - said he would be right over and cut out.

Naruto looked at the clock. He decided he'd just text Kiba and let him know he'd be coming tomorrow. He fired off a quick message, and felt his hands start to sweat. He was really going to do this? After all the times over the past two years he had told himself he wouldn't. Shouldn't. One conversation with Sasuke, and he was already changing his plans. Although to be fair, he honestly would never have guessed that there could be any conversation that would make Naruto change his mind on whether what Sasuke had done to him was unforgivable. But it had, at least in part.

The thought of going back to the office that Sasuke and Naruto had formed together had Naruto panicking, though. He wasn't prepared for this. 24 hours ago, he wasn't even considering it... had actually explicitly planned to never set foot in that office again. Now everything was turned upside down. He would have to face everyone, and deal with their questions about why he had left so abruptly, and what his plans were now. He wondered if they thought he had just gone off in a huff, or that Sasuke had fired him, or if some had guessed that he had completely fallen apart. He didn't really want to talk about that. But of course people would ask where he'd been and what he'd been doing. And they'd ask him if he were back to stay.

The first two questions Naruto didn't want to talk about, but he at least could come up with some answers. The last question... he had no fucking clue how to answer it. Yesterday, he had his whole new life mapped out and taking off. But now... with what had happened with Sasuke this evening, he didn't know what to do. His mind was a complete muddle. Did he want his old life back? All of it? He wasn't self delusional enough to deny that he missed a lot of things. Especially Sasuke... particularly now he knew that the Sasuke that he had fallen in love with was still here, and the cold-hearted bastard that had seemingly thrown him aside for no reason had been a façade. Even being with him for just that short amount of time today had brought back so much of what he had missed about the man in the first place that it made him ache.

And it wasn't just the sex that he missed, although that had always been amazing. He missed their friendship even more... missed working with Sasuke, just the way they had fit together, built things together, complementing each other's skills and having fun. Sasuke's dry sense of humor and prissy, controlling ways. He missed annoying him and mussing him up. He grinned thinking about all the times he had done just that in the past. He missed the way it had been so much.

But even he could see, especially now, after two years of separation, that it hadn't been perfect. He didn't miss the feeling of inadequacy that he had always felt in that old life. Even in the beginning he had known that Sasuke deserved better than him. And part of him had always been waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for Sasuke to wake up and realize he should be with someone more impressive and move on.

Naruto liked who he was now, the person he had become. He had carved out his own path, without help from Sasuke and based only on his own talents and abilities. He didn't want to go back to feeling substandard. And if he were honest with himself, that part of it wasn't actually Sasuke's fault. While they had competed and insulted each other as a matter of course, the barbs that Sasuke had thrown at him had always been more trash talking and jousting... not really cruel. The reason that they sometimes had stung more than they should had more to do with Naruto's own feelings of inadequacy growing up poor and without a family in a society that valued money and connections. Compared to Sasuke, Naruto wasn't in the same class. Wasn't even in the same school. Sasuke didn't seem to mind it, but Naruto always had.

Would he still feel that way when he stepped back into his old shoes? He had made his own way, created his own name, and was achieving success with his own skills. He had spent the past two years really focusing on what those were. Finally, he could look himself in the eye and know that he was capable of achieving things without riding on Sasuke's coattails. He took a shaking breath, and scrubbed his fingers through his hair. He was stronger now, and knew his own worth. Would he have to choose between Sasuke and his own identity, or could he have both?

Would Sasuke accept Naruto's stronger identity, or was what had attracted Sasuke to Naruto in the first place the fact that Naruto had little identity outside of Sasuke for so long? Naruto didn't know. But Naruto had changed, and there was no turning back.

And then there was the issue of all the lovers Sasuke had taken. Could Naruto get past that? He didn't consider it cheating, but it still hurt. It had only ever been the two of them, but now Sasuke had been with so many others. How would that change things between them? Just being with Yahiko had changed Naruto, and altered his views on intimacy. He had slept with someone he liked a lot, but didn't love. And that was only one person. He didn't know if Sasuke had been serious about any of his lovers, or not. He didn't know what to expect from him now. But from what he had seen, people who had gone through as many sexual partners as Sasuke had typically didn't go back to monogamous relationships. And they would be bound to run into his former lovers upon occasion, with so many of them around. Potentially even people in the office. It wasn't as though Sasuke had been particularly discreet. In the past, no matter how many people threw themselves as Sasuke's feet, Naruto had known that he was the only one that Sasuke had ever let touch him in that way... that he had known a side to Sasuke that no one else did. Now, that was not true. By a long shot. And it changed things.

But Naruto knew he might be jumping the gun, worrying about all this. Last night Sasuke had made it clear that he at least had some interest in rebuilding a relationship with Naruto. But how serious of one, and of what type, Naruto had no idea. If Sasuke was looking for an 'open relationship' like the one Yahiko had with Konan, he was not going to find it with Naruto. _No fucking way._

He walked to his closet, looking at the suits that he owned. He thought back to the sleek, Armani business suits that Sasuke had purchased for him. Always black, with white or blue button down shirts and usually a red tie. When a recording label had reached out to Naruto interested in bringing him on as an artistic director for some of their music videos for some of their Goth and metal artists that were interested in a 'dark' feel, he had needed a suit. He had finally learned that Sasuke had not been simply trying to annoy him by forcing him to wear certain clothes to formal meetings. This was just the reality of business in any industry, even the music and art worlds. If you wanted to be taken seriously by the big wigs, you had to dress the part. Naruto had felt a brief twinge of guilt for all the grousing he had given Sasuke in the past over this.

Not knowing much about clothing on his own, he had let Konan give him a crash course on 'rocker fashion', and ended up choosing a slate, skinny Dolce and Gabbana suit, under which he wore with tight-fitting, thin burnt-orange cotton henley. It was the first suit he owned that he had actually liked. And the collarless shirt didn't make him feel like he was being strangled. While it wasn't technically business formal, it would be as close as Naruto was willing to go anymore. And fuck it. It was still half his company. He'd hated dress codes since his school days. He'd wear what he wanted.

He laughed a bit when he thought of what Sasuke's reaction was likely to be. They man had always been so particular about clothes. Well, Naruto decided he would start off as he meant to go on. If his current self wasn't compatible with his old life or the people in it, then at least he would know.

Naruto heard a knock at his door and ran to answer it. He flung it open, and immediately embraced his childhood friend.

"Shika - it's damn good to see you," Naruto said.

"Took you long enough to call me," was the reply. Naruto grinned sheepishly.

"Come on in," Naruto stepped back, Shikamaru following him inside.

"I like your place... it's very you," Shikamaru said, looking around.

"Yeah, well, that's what happens when you live alone," Naruto said, a strange mix of sadness and pride coloring his voice.

Shikamaru of course noticed, and understood. "Yeah. The separation has been hard on both of you, but good for you as well, I guess."

Naruto just looked at his friend, taking in the serious tone he used. "Do you want anything to drink?"

"Sure... whatever you're having."

Naruto walked over to the fridge and brought out two beers. Given it was already late and they would both have an early start to the morning, he didn't think anything harder would be appropriate. They sat on the orange couch. They talked about work, travel, old friends. It had been so long since Naruto had talked to someone who knew him from his past. He felt the tension and nervousness melt away as he realized that this friendship had withstood his running away. Maybe the others would as well.

"So are you seeing anyone, Shika?"

Shikamaru smiled a little. "Yeah... Temari and I got together a little over a year ago."

"Temari! Like, as in Gaara's sister Temari? The one that everyone is terrified to date because either she or her brothers will likely dismember them if it goes wrong?"

Shikamaru just shrugged casually. "Yeah, that's the one."

"Damn, Shika. You must have stones of steel. That's awesome. How did you two even meet?"

Shikamaru flushed. "Actually, I guess I have you to thank for that. When you turned over all your legal matters to Gaara, I started seeing him quite a bit. Especially after he basically went ballistic on Sasuke, about two months after you left."

Shikamaru paused, looking directly at Naruto. They had known each other too long for Naruto to not recognize the pain and questions in his friend's eyes.

Naruto sighed. "Gaara told you, didn't he?"

Shikamaru didn't pretend to misunderstand. "Yeah. He was trying to get me to reign in Sasuke, and knew that if I understood what your situation was I wouldn't let Sasuke persecute you. I saw the hospital report. Dammit, Naruto. Why didn't you call me? You didn't have to go through everything by yourself. You have people other than Sasuke who care about you."

Naruto flinched, hearing the underlying hurt in his friend's relatively stoic tone. "I'm sorry, Shika... it was just... I was so messed up. And I didn't want to put anyone in the position of choosing sides, especially you, since you were still working here. Plus..." Naruto shifted uncomfortably, "... it was definitely not one of my finer moments. I could hardly remember to eat, and I didn't really have any concept of how much time was passing or the shape I was in until... until I hit bottom. And then I was so pissed off at myself for letting it get to that point, that I didn't want anyone to know. As far as the people in Andalusia knew, I was just recovering from an illness. There was no shame in that. People from home would know the truth."

Shikamaru sighed. "Idiot. There's no shame in being devastated by the loss of a spouse. No one here would have judged you. We could have helped. You didn't need to go through it alone."

Naruto smiled softly. "Thanks, man. I guess... I just wasn't able to think clearly. But I know you would have been there for me if I'd let you."

Shikamaru gave a slight nod, acknowledging the statement, and accepting the apology.

"So I am guessing Sasuke told you about the letter and the photos, and you told him what really happened that night."

Naruto's eyes widened. "How do you know about that? I just found out yesterday. Sasuke came to me as soon as he got the letter. I didn't think anyone else even knew."

"You know that he is still living with Itachi, right?"

Naruto's blood started to freeze, realizing that he had been wrong in thinking that worst case scenario was Hinata being confronted by Sasuke. Hinata being confronted by _Itachi_ who would be seeing blood on behalf of his beloved baby brother was a way scarier thing. Itachi on the warpath for his brother was like all four horsemen of the apocalypse combined. Naruto fumbled for his phone, despite the late hour. "Holy shit. I have to warn Hinata before Itachi -"

"He already went and got her."

"What?!"

"Sasuke had left the photos on their kitchen table when he got back the night you punched him," Shikamaru smirked, remembering the way Itachi had seemed both pissed and pleased that his brother had gotten punched. "You're still the only one other than Itachi that has the nerve to give Sasuke what he deserves."

Naruto grinned sheepishly, not feeling particularly proud that he had punched his ex in the face, but not feeling particularly guilty about it either. Shikamaru continued, "Itachi saw the file and went to see Hinata and find out what the hell had happened."

"Oh, my god... is she ok?"

"No," Shikamaru burst out laughing. Naruto was surprised and more than a little annoyed. Sasuke had always disliked Hinata, but Naruto had thought everyone else, including Shikamaru, had liked her. Shikamaru saw the scowl forming on Naruto's face, and forced himself to continue through his laughing. "She was absolutely _furious_. Even Itachi was impressed. She insisted on coming down with Itachi to Gaara's office to discuss what to do about this situation with Gaara and me, once Itachi told her that the divorce wasn't finalized. She wanted to make sure Gaara called off his dogs from Sasuke and that you understood that there was some reason behind what Sasuke had done."

Naruto tried to imagine the timid Hinata dragging Itachi down to confront Gaara with her... and his brain simply failed to conjure up a visual. Itachi and Gaara were arguably two of the most intimidating men on the planet, and Hinata was - Naruto kept recalling the blushing and stammering brunette. Nope. Still not able to get a visual on that scene.

"Then she laid out some ideas on just exactly what should be done about Sakura. I think... Itachi might be a little bit in love with her after that. She was kind of scary."

Naruto just sat there with a stupid grin on his face. His little Hinata... all grown up and playing head mistress with evil geniuses. It was awesome. And if Hinata ended up being Sasuke's sister-in-law... Naruto withheld an evil chuckle. He didn't really believe it could happen, but it made for a hilarious thought.

"So... the discussion was around just bringing everyone up to speed on what had gone down between Sasuke and me two years ago, and extracting some sort of revenge on Sakura? You're not... going to try to force things between Sasuke and me, right?"

Shikmaru shrugged. "Assuming you both keep your heads out of your asses and actually talk to each other, which it sounds like you are already starting to do, we see no need for immediate interference."

Naruto thought about it a little more, and realized that most likely Itachi, Gaara, and Shikamaru must have decided that Naruto and Sasuke were going to get back together. The combined horsepower of those three intellects could easily destroy or create the earth 100 times over. If the three of them had gotten together and decided to meddle in Naruto's life, he was screwed. He looked at Shikamaru consideringly, wondering how much the man would actually admit to.

. . .

It was late when Shikamaru finally left. Naruto kept trying to imagine a fiery Hinata ordering Gaara and Itachi around. It provided several minutes of amusement. But after a while, his mind shifted back to what tomorrow at the office would be like. And lunch with Sasuke. What would they even talk about in a public setting? Work? Friends? Their 'marriage', and whether or not to file?

And that brought Naruto full circle to the one looming fact that his brain had been contemplating from a safe distance as though it were a UFO. He was still married to Sasuke. And what the fuck did that even mean now? Did he want to still be married to Sasuke? He had finally made his peace with the divorce. Finally, finally, _finally_ he had gotten his shit together enough to be ok with no longer having his life touch Sasuke's. Hadn't he? But then why did he feel this sense of almost elation that Sasuke had decided not to go through with it? That it was somehow a small miracle that he was still married to Sasuke? Even if he simultaneously broke out in a cold sweat of sheer panic at the thought of being back with him. And what the hell would he talk about tomorrow at lunch with his estranged _husband_?

 _Husband._ The word resonated through him, and his body reacted instantly and aggressively to it blending the word with the image of Sasuke. Naruto looked down, and literally rolled his eyes at his own dick, which had sprung to throbbing attention. "Seriously? That's what you want to jump straight into?" He asked himself in a completely exasperated voice. No, he was not talking to his dick. Just... out loud to himself in his bedroom. Because that was more socially acceptable. Right? He ignored the sound of his own teeth grinding, and walked to the bathroom to relieve himself of the tension between his thighs. Having gone two years without sex until Yahiko, he had gotten pretty efficient at self-service. And whatever happened between him and Sasuke, Naruto wanted it to start with what was in their heads and hearts, not what was in their pants. Sex had never been their problem. If things were going to get resolved, it had to start with fixing what was wrong, not what was right.

He just really hoped he had enough willpower to hold to that.

-xXx-

_Sasuke groaned as his hands slid over the smooth, tan skin. He felt the heat searing through him at every point of contact between his body and the hard body twining around him. Excruciating pleasure crashed over him, as he felt his body slam into that of his lover's, again and again. And the voice, the words that always were said, whispered in his ear by that low, husky voice like a mantra. "God, Sasuke, I love you so fucking much."_

Sasuke woke up, shuddering in the aftermath of the intense pleasure of the dream. It has been almost six months since he had had one of his 'Naruto' dreams, and felt the hollow emptiness in his chest of waking up alone in his bed. Usually, he'd be swamped with that empty feeling for hours, but today the emptiness faded into anticipation as he remembered the night before, and the fact that he would be seeing Naruto again today at the office. After what had happened, or more specifically what had _almost_ happened but _didn't_ in Naruto's studio, his body had been full of pent-up desire. He wouldn't trivialize it and call it lust. It was more than that. Sure, he loved Naruto's body. Who wouldn't? But he had slept with other people with fantastic bodies. And barely gotten off. He loved Naruto: Naruto's passion, his honesty, his integrity, his humor... all of it wrapped into that unbelievably sexy and humble package of Naruto. He got up and threw his now sticky boxers in the hamper and went and took a shower.

He had done some hard thinking when he had gotten home last night. He wanted Naruto back. All the reasons he had wanted to divorce Naruto in the first place were gone. And he didn't blame him for his relationship with Yahiko, though he was going to do everything in his power to end that completely and abruptly. Last night had made it painfully clear that Naruto had never betrayed him. And it had also given him hope that things could be resolved between them. Naruto didn't hate him. That had been a tremendous relief. But Sasuke knew that Naruto still hadn't fully forgiven him either. Or at least, he hadn't fully resolved what he felt about Sasuke after so much time had passed, and so much damage had been wrought.

Sasuke understood that. He accepted that challenge. As long as Naruto didn't hate him, as long as he at least was willing to try to understand why Sasuke had done what he'd done, then there was a way to mend this. Naruto's rejection of him that night before had hurt, even though he should have expected it. Sasuke hadn't been thinking clearly at the time, his mind clouded by alcohol and lust, and he had acted rashly. But he wouldn't make the same mistake again. He would let Naruto come to him this time. He needed to give Naruto the chance to vent his anger, and come to terms with it. And he needed to remind Naruto of why they had worked so well together in the first place, of all the reasons that they were the only two people for each other.

He smirked slightly when he thought of Naruto's expression when he had left his loft the night before. Naruto had looked completely shocked. He hadn't even moved as Sasuke had closed the door. Sasuke counted that as a good thing. He had taken a risk in revealing so early that they were still married. Naruto could call Gaara first thing in the morning and file their copy of the divorce papers, making it a reality. Sasuke's stomach clenched at the thought. But somehow, he knew that Naruto wouldn't do that, not when there was still a chance for their relationship to be repaired. Sasuke told himself that if Naruto had delayed two years before signing the damn papers when he thought Sasuke had simply gotten bored with him and tossed him aside, he would hold off until they'd had time to fully talk things through now that everything had changed.

And the risk of not telling Naruto would have been greater, because then he might have felt like Sasuke was hiding it or manipulating him in some way. If they were going to have any shot at all of rebuilding things between them, it couldn't start with secrets. So Sasuke had just thrown it out there, and waited to see the reaction.

He was looking forward to today. For the first time in two years, he could feel anticipation simmer in his veins at the thought of going to work. He realized that he hadn't spoken with Itachi since he had called and asked for Naruto's address. Itachi was being unusually patient at being kept in the dark about his little brother's activities, and Sasuke suddenly had the unsettling feeling that his brother had not been idle during this time. Hinata had come back into town yesterday, he remembered now.

Sasuke suddenly also realized that he had left the folder containing Sakura's letter on the kitchen table when he had come back from seeing Naruto the night at his apartment. His jaw had been throbbing, and he had just dropped it on the table when he had gone to get some ice. The next morning, he hadn't even thought to look for it, being focused just on finding Naruto and talking things out. Sasuke dried off and walked to the kitchen. The folder was nowhere to be found. Itachi was not home either. He decided he'd corner Itachi when he got back from work and find out what the man had been up to.

-xXx-

Sasuke looked at the clock in the office. It was just 9am. Shikamaru had texted Sasuke earlier that morning saying that he would be brining Naruto in. Sasuke again felt a flash of annoyance that someone else seemed to know things about Naruto that Sasuke didn't. Why did Naruto need someone to bring him in? And if he did need someone, why hadn't he asked Sasuke?

His fingers curled around the small circle of metal that he held in his pocket. He never really understood why he had kept his wedding band. He had though about throwing it in a gutter into the sewers, giving it to a homeless man, melting it down and turning it into a gold bullet (don't ask why he thought about that one, he didn't really know). But in the end, it had ended up in the small drawer in his nightstand by the side of the bed that Naruto used to sleep on.

And somehow this morning, as he was getting dressed for work, he had opened the drawer and took the ring out. He had wanted to put it on, as a declaration of his intent. Naruto now knew that they were still legally married. But they both knew that there was a big difference between the legal status and the reality of the relationship. For now. His hand still in his pocket, he slowly slid his ring finger into the familiar band of gold. He wondered if Naruto had kept his. But it didn't matter. Sasuke ran his thumb over the ring now on his finger... an admission that he still belonged to Naruto. And he hoped that Naruto still belonged to him. If there was one thing the past two years had taught Sasuke, it was that there was no one else he wanted besides Naruto. Everyone else was just empty and shallow compared with him.

Sasuke just had to remind him, show him again how they fit together, that there could never be anyone else for either of them. In his mind, they'd already wasted two years being miserable without each other. Why waste any more time?

If he had his way, Naruto would be living with him by the end of the week. He snorted softly at his own ego. Sasuke knew he had done some serious damage. And Naruto had always been a challenge, even in the smoothest of times. This would be the biggest one yet. But rather than feel nervous or discouraged, Sasuke felt exhilarated. The challenge and friction and brutal honesty that they had always inflicted on each other was at the core of what Sasuke loved best about their relationship. Naruto wouldn't just fold and play nice because Sasuke told him to. There would be no facades, no falseness between them, unlike everyone else in the superficial world that Sasuke had grown up in. And he was going to get that back. Because they belonged to each other. And no one else.

"Welcome back!" Sasuke was snapped out of his reverie by the sounds of people shouting, and he looked up to see Naruto walking in with Shikamaru. Naruto's expression was a mixture of surprise, humble embarrassment, and happiness as he realized that so many people were here to greet him. Naruto blushed slightly, smiling, while he rubbed the back of his neck. So typical. The dobe still didn't realize how much people liked him and cared about him. How he was able to light up the entire room just by walking into it. Somewhere in his mind, Naruto still viewed himself as that grubby, poor little orphan that was too loud and too uncouth. It always amazed Sasuke that Naruto had never become a completely conceited asshole give his looks and accomplishments. But somehow, he hadn't.

Sasuke had hung back, letting the swarm of employees greet his blond. Naruto's eyes scanned the room, then locked onto his. A small smile formed on the tan lips, and Sasuke's lips turned up slightly in return, just as Kiba let out a roar and nearly picked Naruto off the ground in a bear hug. "Really good to have you back, man!"

Naruto laughed and hugged the man back. "Good to be back. Sorry I fell off the face of the earth for a while."

"So are you back to stay? What's the deal?" Kiba asked, still smiling excitedly.

Sasuke noticed the way Naruto's face seemed to freeze. His smile was still in place, so no one but Sasuke and Shikamaru caught the hesitation. "Yeah, well, that's part of what I wanted to talk to you about. Let's go to your office and catch up on how things are going."

Kiba heard what he wanted to hear, and took that as a yes. Sasuke knew better. Naruto was hedging... because he hadn't decided.

"Naruto! I can't believe that you used to work here! What the hell are you doing back? Don't you have a video shoot tomorrow? Look at you... that suit is fucking hot! Has Yahiko seen you in this yet? Man, he's gonna bust something when he does." Suigetsu said, completely ignoring the freezing glare that was coming from the dark-haired man behind him.

Naruto punched Suigetsu on the shoulder, glancing nervously at Sasuke. "Still working on that connection between your brain and your mouth, eh, Suigetsu?"

Naruto walked over to where Sasuke was standing. "Hey," he said, feeling slightly awkward after Suigetsu's comment. "We still on for lunch today?"

"Sure. You go talk things through with Kiba on the current state of the staff, and then we'll go through the portfolio with the department heads. We can grab lunch, then in the afternoon you can meet with the new hires in the marketing group," Sasuke's tone was even, but Naruto wasn't fooled. _Fucking Suigetsu,_ Naruto thought irritably. He simply nodded then let himself be led of by an exuberant Kiba.

Sasuke's eyes followed the blond down the hall to Kiba's office. He had to agree with Suigetsu on one thing, though. The tightly tailored fit of Naruto's suit was pretty fucking hot. And if he had anything to do about it, Yahiko was NOT going to see Naruto in it.

Shikamaru had seen the exchange, and walked over to Sasuke.

"You ok?"

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the man. "Why did you drive Naruto in?"

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow in surprise. Sasuke was... jealous? He must have entered some alternate universe for an insecure Sasuke to exist. "He hasn't bought a car yet. He mentioned it last night, so I just texted him this morning and told him I would pick him up."

Sasuke clenched his jaw, trying to get himself back under control. Yahiko was evidently some sort of business partner to Naruto, in addition to being his lover. He knew where Naruto lived and Sasuke had had to ask. Shikamaru knew that Naruto needed a car, and had been over to his apartment the night before. And had Naruto's cell number to text him.

Sasuke didn't have Naruto's new cell number. Didn't know that Naruto didn't have a car anymore (of course he wouldn't have kept his old one if he had been living outside the country for two years). He hated that everyone else seemed to know things about his _husband_ that he didn't. He took a breath, knowing he was being possessive and irrational. "Right," was all he said.

Shikamaru suppressed rolling his eyes, then walked out of his boss's office. He hadn't missed the glint of gold on Sasuke's left hand. He wondered if Naruto would notice. He thought for a moment about his generally oblivious friend. Probably not. Luckily, there were several people ready to help give him a nudge if he needed it. But if Sasuke had made up his mind to that extent, he doubted external interference would be necessary. No one knew how to push Naruto's buttons like Sasuke. He just hoped that the walls of their offices were thick enough that everyone wouldn't get to hear it when it happened.

. . . .

"We own a chain of grocery stores? What the fuck, Sasuke."

They were sitting in the board room, seated around a long table with the ten most senior people in the company. They had been giving Naruto an overview of the current portfolio of businesses that they now owned, and the performance of each.

Sasuke rolled his eyes at the blond's comment. "Look, we needed to balance out our portfolio. The grocery stores provide a more steady cash flow and balance our risk across sectors that we were over-exposed on -"

"Yeah, yeah. Financial business jargon blah-blah-blah. So why is it underperforming and what the hell is the marketing strategy. This is a consumer business, so what are we doing to drive foot traffic and repeat business?"

Suigetsu handed Naruto an overview of their commercial strategy, including photos of the stores, TV advertising stills, and print ads.

"Um... so the name of your group is supposed to be 'creative marketing', right? So, literally, that means you are supposed to be creative in designing the look and feel of the advertising campaigns. I see these and all I get from this is you are advertising to humans who eat food. That can't be the value proposition. What kind of store is this? High end? Gourmet? Convenience? Cheap? What kind of shoppers? Retirees or hipsters? What are we working with here? I need to know if we should be stocking prune juice and Depends pads, or margarita mix and Trojan ultrathins."

Sasuke leaned back in his chair, just letting the conversation roll over him. God he had missed this. He just watched his business partner in action, completely unaware of the soft, indulgent look on his own face. It didn't go unnoticed by several others in the room, though. Karin had to bite her cheek from laughing outright. She had never even imagined that their stoic, acidic CEO could create such an expression. She sighed a little to herself. Why were the hot ones always gay?

Reluctantly, Sasuke went back to his own office, leaving Naruto to work with the marketing team. He looked at the clock. Only two hours to lunch. He'd be able to talk to Naruto then, and have at least a little bit of privacy.

. . . . . .

A tap on his door brought Sasuke out of the financial spreadsheet he had been going through. He looked up as Naruto poked his head in.

"Hey."

"Hey," Sasuke replied. "Lunch time?"

"Yeah. Do you want to go to the café around the corner, or have you found a better place?"

"That café closed a year ago. But there's a new place one block over that is good."

Naruto sighed at the small reminder of how much time had passed. He nodded as Sasuke grabbed his phone and they headed out, both feeling the curious glances that were shot their way by their employees. As the entered the elevator, they could hear the buzzing of speculations pick up. In other circumstances, the pair might have been amused (or in Sasuke's case, annoyed), but there was so much uncertainty between the two of them right now that they simply chose to ignore outside speculation for the moment. They had internal speculation of their own to figure out.

The walked the short distance to the restaurant in silence, each lost in their own thoughts of what to say in this lunch. Sasuke had cancelled his appointments after lunch until late in the afternoon, not wanting to feel rushed in this discussion. He knew he'd take flack from Itachi later, but he also knew that his brother would be more annoyed if he put business ahead of something like this. That had been one of their father's main failings... a slave to his work and his fortune. Neither son had admired that about their sire.

The café was nice... with seating set up for conversation and a little privacy rather than the typical open booth seating at many of the other establishments. They sat in a corner table, plants shielding them from the other patrons. They looked through the menu, then ordered.

"So what have you been working on since you've been back?" Sasuke asked, already knowing some of it but curious to hear about the rest.

"Well, I've sold a few paintings, and done a few guest lectures at the University for their Fine Arts department. But most of my salary work has come from work as an artistic director for music videos. I guess angst is in, and Yahiko had sent photos of my work around before I even got here." Naruto hadn't wanted to bring up Yahiko, but there really wasn't any way to avoid him on this topic. As expected, Sasuke's eyes flashed with annoyance at the mention of the man's name.

"How did you meet him?" Sasuke asked, deciding he might as well find all this out now and get it over with.

Naruto shifted uncomfortably. It didn't seem like a good idea to discuss his current lover with his ex/current husband. He certainly had no desire for Sasuke to talk about his lovers. At least, not now. "Um... Jiraya had been teaching creative writing at the university that Yahiko was studying at. Yahiko was a Fine Arts major, but he took a few writing classes as part of his electives, and they hit it off."

 _Of course they did,_ Sasuke thought, forcing his teeth not to grate together. Leave it to that pervert of a godfather to bring a bad influence into Naruto's life. Sasuke didn't care if he sounded jealous. He was.

"So when he was visiting me in Andalusia, I guess he took some pictures of my paintings and sent them to Yahiko. Who liked them, I guess, and it all kind of spiraled from there."

Their food arrived. Naruto snickered at the salad that Sasuke was eating. "Some things never change."

Sasuke looked at the sandwich that Naruto had ordered. Still no sign of ramen in the blond's life. "You seem to have changed... at least your lunch did."

Sasuke had meant it as an innocent comment, and was surprised at the flash of sadness that he saw on Naruto's face at his words. He didn't know what to make of it, but he filed it away to think about later. He didn't want to bring up painful subjects right now.

"How did your conversations go with Kiba and the marketing group today?"

Naruto swallowed the bite of his sandwich gratefully. This was a good, safe topic. He thought. "Well, I talked to Kiba about the current posting for the head of business development and the COO positions. I tweaked the profiles a bit, given that you hadn't been able to find anyone who would stick in the role for very long. He also talked to me about the current people in the marketing and creative groups, and their profiles and backgrounds. Looks like you have some real talent there, though looking through some of the recent campaigns I am guessing they haven't been here very long." Naruto looked up at Sasuke.

"I see," Sasuke said, his tone inflectionless. Which Naruto knew well enough to know meant that if he were someone other than an Uchiha, he would be shouting.

"What?" Naruto asked, honestly confused about what he had said that upset the man right off the bat.

"So you want Kiba to continue the search for the COO and business development positions. You're not staying."

 _Fuck_. Naruto hadn't realized the trap he had already put his foot in. That actually wasn't what he meant... he just wasn't sure one way or the other because he had no idea how things were going to play out between them. Sasuke and he were just too volatile to be able to work together if their relationship ended up not being salvageable. For their sake as well as the sake of the people who worked with them, they had to be sure they could at least be friends before Naruto officially came back permanently to the company. He took a breath, trying to find the words to express this that wouldn't come across as an ultimatum or a threat. "Sasuke..."

Just then an arm went around Sasuke's shoulders. A blond woman with a silk blouse unbuttoned a few buttons past respectable leaned over his shoulder. "Long time no see, sexy. You left before I could give you my number."

Sasuke felt his stomach sink as he saw Naruto's face freeze over. _Of all the fucking times for me to run into someone..._

Sasuke pulled the woman's arm off him. "If I had wanted your number, or your name, I would have asked for it."

The woman's eyes narrowed. "Well you don't need to be such an ass. You seemed enthusiastic enough at the time." She tossed her hair, straightening up and looking at Naruto consideringly. "There are other hot guys out there, you know."

Sasuke shrugged, not taking his eyes off Naruto. Who was looking at his watch. Fuck. "Fantastic. Then go find one of them. Somewhere else."

The woman turned and stalked off.

"Smooth, Sasuke."

Naruto looked really pissed. This was not how Sasuke had wanted this lunch to go. "Look, she decided to hit on me when I was falling down drunk and took me home without even knowing my name. She wasn't looking for true love. All she knew about me was what I looked like, and possibly that I had money."

"And were you so much better? What did you know about her? She didn't rape you. You were there drunk and available. It's what you wanted."

"I didn't say she raped me. And if she was sitting with someone and I walked up to her and was all over her, I'd expect her to send me packing as well."

"Not everyone is a robot like you are, Sasuke." Naruto put his napkin on the table and started to get up. Sasuke's arm shot out and grabbed his wrist.

"I'm not a robot. Just because I don't care about her doesn't mean I don't care about you."

Naruto twisted his wrist out of Sasuke's grip. "The things that we need to talk about aren't going to get discussed in a public restaurant. I'm not going to sit here and make small talk and ignore the fucking herd of elephants in the room."

"You're the one who said we should go to lunch."

"Yeah, but I didn't know that we'd be tripping over people you'd fucked on the way. You want to have lunch with me and Yahiko sometime?"

Sasuke bit back a growl. "I don't have a relationship with that girl... I never had a relationship with any of them."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better? That you let anyone crawl all over you?" Naruto realized he was shouting. He threw some money on the table to cover his portion of the meal. "I'm not talking with you about this here. You did her and all the others to piss me off. Mission accomplished." Naruto turned and started to stalk out, but the sound of Sasuke's voice stopped him.

" _Naruto_ ," Sasuke's voice was raw with emotion. As hurt and angry as Naruto felt, he still hated to hear the pain and desperation. He stopped, and turned around.

"Come over for dinner tonight. We can talk in private at my place," Sasuke said, his voice low.

"I can't. I was supposed to meet Yahiko yesterday, but..." Naruto paused, seeing the look on Sasuke's face. "I need to tell him what's going on."

"And what is going on, Naruto? What are you going to tell him?"

Naruto wasn't proud of the tiny urge he felt to imply that he was going to continue to sleep with Yahiko. But he had never been that kind of person. "I'm going to tell him that I am still technically married."

"And?"

"And he knows me well enough to know what that means."

Sasuke wanted to push Naruto to say more about that, wanted some kind of declaration that Naruto was going to end at least the romantic side of things with Yahiko. But didn't want to seem to be admitting that somehow Yahiko now knew Naruto better than Sasuke. "But you're still going to his place tonight."

Naruto shrugged. "It's kind of none of your business where I go to meet him, Sasuke." Naruto turned and walked out of the restaurant.

Sasuke stared down at the half-eaten food. He suddenly wished this place had a bar.

. . . .

Naruto had just gotten back from lunch and was pacing in his office. He was back much earlier than expected, so he had some time to kill before his meeting with Kiba and the new hires. He had noticed the looks when he had walked in alone, after people had seen him and Sasuke leaving for lunch together. Naruto had never been one for keeping his emotions from his face, so he guessed that people could tell he was upset. _What were you expecting?_ He asked himself in annoyance. _You knew this was going to happen. You knew he had been with a lot of other people, and he's not someone that people are likely to forget. Of course they will try to hook back up with him._ Naruto felt a surge of jealousy and anger. And annoyance with himself for crashing headlong into it. _It would be better if I hadn't started thinking about him as my husband again. No matter what the fucking paper says, we aren't in a marriage right now._

There was a tap at the door, and Naruto growled. "What?"

The door opened, and Gaara walked in. Naruto blinked in surprise. "Hm. Someone's cranky today," the soft, low voice of the redhead carried more than a hint of amusement.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Not in the mood Gaara. I thought you were Sasuke."

Gaara raised a hairless brow at the comment. Shikamaru had called Gaara last night letting him know that Sasuke had told Naruto they were still married. Fully expecting to face the bond's wrath at some point, Gaara had decided to just drop by and save Naruto the trip. He simply stood there, waiting for Naruto to have his say. It wasn't long in coming.

"So I hear I'm still married," Naruto said with a deceptively calm voice. "It's funny, because I am pretty sure that I remember signing the papers almost two months ago, and you telling me that you would take care of it."

Gaara looked at him, still no expression on his face.

"And then, thinking that I was _no longer fucking married_ , I had SEX with someone NOT MY HUSBAND! Fucking hell, Gaara! You should have told me when it didn't go through. You know I would never have had sex with someone else if I knew I was still married."

Gaara sighed. "First of all, I had no idea that you were thinking of sleeping with anyone, and I also had no idea that you hadn't slept with anyone after you left Japan. It was pretty clear that Sasuke wasn't holding you to your vows anymore. It's not like you were sneaking out the back window to have an affair or something."

Naruto ran his hands through his hair. "But you still should have told me. Aren't you on my side? I trusted you with all this, and you know how I am with this kind of thing."

A look of hurt flashed across Gaara's usually stoic face. Yes, he did know how Naruto was. Naruto was the most honorable person Gaara had ever met. He hadn't even believed that someone like Naruto existed, someone who literally never went back on his word. He had not wanted to hurt his friend, or put him in moral conflict. He had simply agreed with Shikamaru that both Naruto and Sasuke had seemed unhappy since their split, and there seemed to be no real reason behind it. Getting them to reconsider ending a marriage would be different than having them actually get married again after a divorce was final. Reconciliation would be harder then. The filing of a legal form could neither make nor break a marriage in Gaara's mind. It was irrelevant to the reality of the relationship. But he should have known that Naruto would potentially see it differently.

"Naruto, I am always on your side. I gave the paper to Shikamaru, and he gave it to Sasuke. Sasuke knew that you had signed the form about the divorce. The fact that it wasn't processed by some government administrative office is irrelevant. It doesn't mean you cheated. And you know this," Gaara looked closely at Naruto's expression, and realized he was right. The blond wasn't looking as guilt ridden as he had first made himself out to be. Maybe he wasn't being as irrational as usual about this. Gaara could hope. "If you want, we can file the form ourselves. I have a signed copy of what we gave to Sasuke and Shikamaru. I can take it down and file it today, and the divorce will be official."

Gaara paused, watching his friend's expression. He didn't miss the flash of panic that crossed Naruto's face before it was replaced by confusion. "No," Naruto said slowly. He didn't know what he wanted. But he knew that he _didn't_ want to file that paper.

Gaara simply raised an eyebrow.

"No, I... I guess I don't want to file either."

"So you're getting back together with him."

"No... Yes... I... have no fucking clue," Naruto blew out a breath. "I still love him. But I also still hate him. I know now why he did what he did. But I don't know that things can go back to the way they were before. I don't even think I want them to. But... I'm not ready to walk away."

Gaara simply nodded. "Well, when you work that out, you let me know."

With that, Gaara turned and headed back to his office. He had a shitload of other work to do. Sasuke was just coming up when Gaara was heading out. Gaara looked at the bruise on Sasuke's jaw, but didn't comment. The two men simply nodded tersely to each other and continued walking in opposite directions.

-xXx-

When Sasuke got home, he was still annoyed. Naruto had calmed down, but was still closed off with him for the rest of the day. And he had found out that Naruto wouldn't be coming into the office at all the next day because he had some video shoot he had to work on. _Fuck_.

As Sasuke walked down the hall to the door to his apartment, he was surprised to see a woman walking toward him. _Hinata?_ Her hair was neatly brushed, and her clothes immaculate, but somehow she still looked disheveled. Her cheeks held a soft blush, and her eyes were heavy lidded. He noticed that her mouth looked a bit swollen.

She simply nodded to him and kept walking. Trying to make sense of that, Sasuke unlocked the door and went in.

"Itachi? You home?" He didn't hear an answer, so he went and knocked on the door to Itachi's room. There was no answer, but Sasuke could hear the muffled sound of the shower running. He was about to turn away when he heard a faint sound. Itachi was... humming?

His mind refused to connect the dots laying before him. _Itachi and Hinata? No fucking way._

-xXx-

_to be continued_


	7. Heavy Undertow

-xXx-

Naruto closed the door to his apartment. It was midnight, and he had been up since six in the morning after only a few hours of sleep the night before. He was exhausted.

After so much time alone, the swirl of people he had interacted with today had exhausted him, but also somehow helped him take that final step back into normalcy. He had always been a social person, and the past two years had been lonely.

He thought back over the evening. It had not been as hard as he thought it would be to have the conversation he needed to with Yahiko. Yahiko had been surprised to learn that Naruto was still married, but not surprised at the return to the 'just friends' status. He knew the depth of feeling that Naruto had for his ex. The pain that was reflected in Naruto's art could only have been birthed from a consuming kind of love. And as much as he might not like Sasuke, he had seen the look in the man's eyes and had known he was not going to let Naruto go. Even without the surprise news of the marriage still being in effect, Yahiko had been expecting Naruto to put things on hold between them until he got things sorted out with Sasuke.

Naruto knew that Sasuke was upset that he had seen Yahiko tonight instead of him. Naruto had had time to calm down after the awkward intrusion at lunch. There was no way to erase what had happened. They had both slept with other people. It had happened. He could continue to be jealous and angry about it, or he could just accept that it happened and talk to Sasuke about what it meant now.

Naruto pulled out his phone. He wasn't sure if Sasuke had changed his cell from two years ago, but he figured he'd try.

_Teme. It's late, so I won't call. I know how you are about your beauty sleep. I hope this is still your number. If it is, now you have mine as well. If you're up for it, I can call you after I finish work tomorrow and we can meet at my place for dinner. But if someone you fucked shows up there, I am throwing them out the window. Just sayin'._

Naruto hit send, and didn't expect a reply until morning. He was surprised when his phone rang few seconds later.

"Hey." He recognized the smooth baritone of Sasuke's voice immediately.

"Hey."

"So... where are you?"

The abrupt question puzzled Naruto for a second, until he realized that Sasuke must have been worried he'd spend the night at Yahiko's. _Sasuke's jealous_. Naruto rolled his eyes but smiled, knowing he was being an ass for enjoying it a little, but put the man out of his misery. "I'm home. Alone."

There was a pause. Then,

"Is that an invitation?"

"Bastard. Did you call me after midnight to talk dirty, or are you going to answer me about tomorrow."

"I can come over tomorrow. What time do you think that the shoot will end?"

"Not sure... I've only done a few of these. Sometimes they are quick, and sometimes they take all day. That's why I figured it would be better if I call you when I finish, so you won't be waiting for me to show up."

"I could pick you up from your shoot. Shikamaru mentioned that you don't have a car."

"Nah, it's across town from you. I have someone who is going to drive me, so it's not a problem."

"Yahiko?"

"Look, he's my friend."

"He's more than a friend."

Naruto sighed. So many landmines. He hated talking about stuff like this over the phone. "Not anymore. I told you I was going to talk to him tonight. And I did. He knows where I stand on this kind of thing. He understood... and actually expected it after talking with you the other day."

Naruto listened, hearing slight the sound of Sasuke breathing.

"Hey. Did you fall asleep on me?"

"Let me pick you up tomorrow."

Sasuke didn't say please, but it was pretty close. Naruto could hear it in his tone. He had wanted to keep his old and new lives separate, at least until he had resolved things with Sasuke one way or another. But Sasuke was never one to be contained. Naruto sighed, already feeling himself getting pulled back into the undertow of his attraction for this man. He needed to find some way to keep some degree of separation so he wouldn't drown, but he also knew he would have to pick his battles. They had both always been insanely possessive of each other. He knew it wasn't healthy. But he also knew that he hadn't been kidding about throwing one of Sasuke's lovers out the window. Why would he assume Sasuke would feel differently?

"Ok, fine. I'll text you the address. I'll give you a call when I think we are getting close to wrapping up, and you can come get me. But if your day ends up exploding and you can't make it, just let me know so I don't end up waiting. It's not the best part of town."

"I'll be there."

"Ok. Now get some sleep. I don't have to be in until eleven tomorrow morning. You have to be in by eight."

"Ok, mom."

"If you think of me as your mom, you're a fucking pervert."

"I may be a pervert based on what I think about you, but it definitely has nothing to do with my mother."

Naruto hesitated for a second, then decided he wasn't ready to go there.

"Good night Sasuke."

"Hn."

Naruto closed the phone. In all their years of dating, the bastard never actually said good night. It was one of a list of words that the man avoided. Like 'sorry', 'please', or 'I love you'. But somehow, Naruto loved that about him. Added to his bastardly charm. He fell asleep grinning, looking forward to tomorrow. It was comforting somehow that at least some things hadn't changed.

. . . . .

Sasuke pulled up in front of the warehouse that matched the address that Naruto had given him. Naruto hadn't been kidding. This was not a good part of town. He wondered if his McLaren was still going to be there when he came back out. He locked the car and headed in towards the open door.

Traffic had been a nightmare, and it had taken him much longer than he had expected to get across town to pick Naruto up. But he hadn't received any annoyed texts from Naruto, so he hoped that meant he hadn't kept him waiting long.

As Sasuke stepped into the building he heard voices, and immediately recognized one of them as Naruto. The other man's voice was smooth and sexy... somehow a little too sexy. Sasuke walked in, his eyes adjusting to the dimmed light and searching for Naruto. The warehouse was a maze of stacked wooden crates, cameras, and lighting equipment. Sasuke followed the sound of the voices. The mats in the entryway had muffled Sasuke's footsteps, making his approach silent. There were only a few people left, as most had already left for the evening.

"Why won't you come back to my place? Looks like your friend isn't coming," the man was saying.

"He'll be here. I'm not worried," Naruto replied easily.

Sasuke turned a corner and saw two men setting on a stack of crates. He recognized one immediately as Naruto, who was dressed casually in a tight black T-shirt and cargo pants. The other man was slim, with shoulder-length brown hair and tattoos around his neck and arms. He was sitting next to Naruto, just slightly too close to look completely innocent. Looking at them, Sasuke could tell the he must be one of the musicians. The man leaned slightly towards the blond, and his hand brushed Naruto's thigh. Naruto shifted, pulling his body just out of reach of the man. Sasuke suppressed a growl. What the fuck was Naruto doing with this guy?

"I know a bit about you, actually," the man was continuing, ignoring Naruto's subtle rejection. "I looked you up when I saw who the recording company had picked to be the artistic director for the video."

"Makes sense, I guess. It's good to know about the person you're working with, and what their experience is. Though I don't have much experience in this industry yet."

"True. You did a lot of work in other industries before this, though. But I meant that I know about your past relationship with that business tycoon, Uchiha?"

Sasuke could see Naruto's shoulders tense. He knew he should walk forward to draw attention to his presence, but he was curious what the man was going to say about him. Sasuke was standing in plain sight... it wasn't that he was hiding or anything. They just were too wrapped up in their conversation to notice his presence. He stayed where he was.

"You know Sasuke?"

"No... I just found it interesting that you like wealthy men who can help you with your career. I could be... very helpful to you."

Sasuke felt his fists clench, and he took a step forward when he heard Naruto burst out laughing. "Seriously, dude. You're an idiot if you think Sasuke would have needed to help me with my career in order to get me interested in him. You've obviously never met him. And come on, man... you're a famous musician... incredibly talented and good looking. You can have just about anyone you want. You don't need to sell yourself short by making it seem like you'd need to bribe someone to sleep with you."

Naruto shrugged, continuing on. "For me, I know I am good at what I do. Your label wouldn't have hired me if they didn't think so, and I know that you approved the decision based on my paintings and some of my advertising work. If you don't like my work here, then you can fire me. It's your call. But if I wanted to make it at something by fucking my way to the top, I'd have done it straight up and been a male escort. I'm pretty straightforward that way. So let's you and me agree that we're both too good at what we do to make a deal like that. I like you, and I like your music. But I'm involved with someone else, so that's as far as it goes."

The man looked surprised for a minute, then laughed a little, "Wow, you're very direct. It's actually very attractive. But fair enough. Just keep me in mind if you become... _uninvolved_."

Sasuke was still annoyed, but he was able to unclench his fists. Naruto had managed to give a firm rejection while still giving the guy a compliment. Sasuke wondered how that was even possible. Naruto stood up, and noticed Sasuke standing there. "Sasuke, you're late. I thought you were standing me up."

The musician looked at Sasuke, a flash of recognition in his eyes at the mention of Sasuke's name. He glanced at Naruto, seeing the blond's attention completely latched onto Sasuke, and reading the intensity of his gaze. Understanding the situation for what it was, the man simply sighed, stretched, and stood up. "I'll see you in the studio when we go over the runs."

Sasuke felt the familiar satisfaction flow through him as he realized that the man had no chance. Naruto's blue eyes were fixed on his, amusement sparkling in them as he likely read Sasuke's possessive posture. Naruto simply nodded to the man, slung his bag over his shoulder, and walked over to Sasuke.

They headed out to the parking area together. Sasuke gave his car a quick once-over to be sure all the hub caps were still there.

Naruto laughed. "Don't worry, honey. I'll protect you from the bad men around here."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "The guy takes a few kung fu classes and now he thinks he's Bruce Lee. Get in the car, idiot."

Naruto paused, looking at the car. Sasuke hadn't had this two years ago.

"Nice car, by the way. Are you compensating for something?"

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at his former lover, walking over until he was standing directly in front of him, less than an inch separating their bodies. Naruto's legs were pressed back against the door of the car. "If you think I have anything to compensate for, your memory is getting short."

They stood there for a few seconds, eyes locked on each other. Naruto fought the almost overpowering urge to just shove Sasuke down onto the hood of his shiny, black, phallus-symbol of a car and fuck him, regardless of who might see them. He had no problem at all with his memory of the man. And Sasuke was right... he had _nothing_ he needed to compensate for.

Naruto felt a tremor ripple through the muscles in his hands and arms as he forced himself to remember all the reasons he didn't want to go there yet, and blew out a shaky breath. "So are we going to my place for dinner or what? I'm starving."

Sasuke smirked, easily reading the poorly suppressed lust in Naruto's eyes, but he stepped back. He might be a little disappointed that Naruto had been able to show restraint, but he could wait.

They both got into the car, Naruto with a bit more effort, being unfamiliar with the contortions required to ride in the racing car.

"You know, this is a fine piece of machinery and all, but it is incredibly impractical. How the hell do you jam yourself into this every day?"

They were both above-average height. "I still have my other car. But this is my favorite. And it's not built for comfort, it's built for performance."

Naruto snickered, ignoring the obvious come-back to that one. "Whatever. When I get around to buying a car, it's going to be actually practical. It's not like you get to drive on a racetrack with this thing or anything."

Sasuke just shrugged. "Actually, I do. There's a racetrack just outside of town. It's a great stress reliever to take this out and open it up on the track by myself."

Naruto frowned at that. "As long as you don't combine your new-found love of speeding with your newfound vice of drinking, I guess."

"So what was with that guy?" Sasuke asked, changing the subject.

Naruto shrugged. "He's the guitarist in the band. He's an ok guy... just a little horny and tired of the usual groupies, I guess."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "He's an ass."

"He's rich and famous. Aren't all of you guys asses?"

Sasuke slammed on the brakes and pulled over, his patience snapping. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Naruto shrugged. "Just that guys like you are used to everyone around you trying to suck your dick, both literally and figuratively. So you come to expect certain responses from people. The music business is full of them. But it doesn't faze me... I can handle myself with people like that. I'm not impressed, and I'm not intimidated. If they don't want to work with me, then that's fine. I really don't care."

Sasuke looked at Naruto for a minute, then snorted out a laugh. "I guess that's true. You always were unique like that. It's one of the things I always liked about you."

He pulled back out on the road and they continued along to Naruto's apartment in more comfortable silence.

Sasuke pulled up in front of Naruto's apartment building. "Aren't you afraid of parking this thing? Fixing a scratch on this probably costs more than a month's worth of rent for me."

Sasuke just shrugged and got out. Naruto followed suit, and they headed up to his apartment. Naruto unlocked the door and they went inside, taking off their shoes. Sasuke was still dressed for work, so he removed his jacket and tie as well, and laid them over the back of one of the kitchen chairs. He unbuttoned the cuffs of his shirt and rolled his sleeves midway to his elbow.

"So what's for dinner?" Normally, Sasuke wouldn't even have asked, because whenever Naruto had cooked (and that had been a rarity) it would have been instant ramen. Which really didn't qualify as cooking. But somehow he knew that that was no longer the case.

"Well," Naruto opened the refrigerator and began taking things out. Sasuke recognized some vegetables, and his eyebrows rose. "I had time to go to the grocery store today, so I am going to make shrimp curry."

Naruto turned and grinned at Sasuke, remembering the last time the man had eaten a spicy curry. "But don't worry... I'll go easy on you with the spices."

Naruto got some rice going in the rice cooker, and began mincing garlic, onions and ginger. Sasuke watched in amused fascination. Naruto had been a complete fire hazard in the kitchen before. But he now seemed totally at ease. Sasuke grabbed a second cutting board and a knife. "What else do you need cut?"

Naruto raised an eyebrow, but handed him some tomatoes and bell peppers. And they fell into an easy rhythm of cutting and talking about their day. Sasuke hadn't done this with anyone since his mother had died, and the vivid memories from his earlier childhood suddenly surged up and caught him by surprise. He was totally unprepared for the rush of emotion that swamped him. Naruto paused, seeing the anguished expression on Sasuke's face. "You ok?"

Sasuke nodded, struggling for control of his voice. "Yeah. It's just... I used to do this with my mother when I was a kid. It's... nice."

Naruto just looked at Sasuke, and in that instant, all his uncertainty about what he wanted to happen between them evaporated. He loved this man - this beautiful, tortured, complicated person. Naruto set down his knife, wiping his hands on the kitchen towel. He walked up behind Sasuke and wrapped his arms around the man's waist, resting his chin on Sasuke's shoulder. "Yeah. It is nice."

Naruto knew that if Sasuke had been with anyone else, he would simply have closed up and walked out of the room when the memories had surfaced. Naruto didn't take for granted the depth of trust that Sasuke had shown him by simply allowing him to see his emotions, and know their source. It reestablished something in Naruto, that this trust Sasuke had in Naruto had not been destroyed.

They stood there for several minutes, Naruto holding Sasuke lightly while Sasuke wrestled down the emotions that had temporarily over-run him. Naruto always knew what to do when Sasuke had needed him. The quiet strength and understanding... he never pushed. When Sasuke had regained his equilibrium, he gave Naruto a small jab in the stomach with his elbow. "Back to work. I'm getting hungry."

Naruto grinned, and tightened his grip briefly around Sasuke's waist with a quick nuzzle to his neck. "Bossy," he said, but moved back to cooking.

When it was ready, they sat down at Naruto's small kitchen table to eat. Naruto watched with amusement while Sasuke tentatively took a small bite, then looked up to Naruto in surprise. "This is actually... good," he said. "I guess I won't need that bag of rice cakes I brought in the car in case your cooking was inedible."

Naruto kicked him under the table. "Never underestimate Uzumaki Naruto."

Sasuke smiled, and they continued eating.

"So where did you learn to cook like this?"

"When I was in Andalusia. I decided I wanted to be able to cook properly," Naruto paused. This was starting to touch on dangerous ground. He looked at Sasuke, trying to decide how much he was ready to really open up. Sasuke felt the hesitation, and looked up from his food.

He knew that Naruto was debating telling him something. And suddenly, even though it was just cooking, Sasuke knew that he needed Naruto to tell him what made him learn to cook, that somehow it went a lot deeper than simple food preparation.

"So no more instant ramen, then," he said, hoping he wasn't pushing, but knowing he was.

"No," Naruto paused, then dove in. If Sasuke could be open, then so could he. There was no turning back now. Naruto had made his decision, so he just had to man up and answer Sasuke's questions. They needed to get everything out in the open about the past before they could move ahead and talk about their futures. "No. You know, when I was young, no one took the time to cook for me, and I didn't know how to do it for myself, but instant ramen was at least warm food. And then when I was old enough to learn, somehow it just seemed a waste, cooking just for me." Naruto looked down, and was startled when Sasuke's hand grabbed his wrist forcefully.

"It's not a waste, Naruto. You're not a waste."

"I know. I know that now. It's just, for a long time, I didn't. But after... after what happened between us, I didn't really have anything else to anchor me. And I had to decide whether I could be worth it to myself or not." Naruto felt Sasuke's grip tighten even more on his wrist, as though willing Naruto to make the right choice. "And I did. I decided that, no matter what, it would be ok."

Sasuke didn't release his grip. He wanted to ask Naruto about the sleeping pills. He wanted to know... but Naruto had already told him he didn't want to talk about it.

"Ask me," Naruto said, already guessing where this was going.

"Did you do it on purpose?"

Naruto looked down. "No. But I didn't really care much at the time about the outcome either."

Sasuke swallowed hard. "If you had died, I would have... " Sasuke felt so much anger, and so much grief all at the same time he almost choked on it.

"I know. It was stupid." Naruto's voice was low. He still felt shame for how low he had sunk, but was glad that Sasuke's eyes showed no pity or disgust for him.

"I was stupid, too," Sasuke said. He saw the reflection of the pain and depression that Naruto was remembering as he thought back to that time, and his hand shook with the need to wipe it away. He knew he was probably bruising Naruto's wrist, but he couldn't let go. "If I ever do something that stupid again, kill me. Not you."

"Pft. Like I'd ever let you do something like that again. I'd just tie you up and make you tell me what was wrong. If we are going to be... together again... I'm never going to let you shut me out like that. For both our sakes. And if you try it, I _will absolutely_ kick your ass."

Sasuke breathed out a small laugh and forced himself to at least loosen his death grip on Naruto's wrist, but still kept his fingers loosely encircling it. His heart was pounding as Naruto's words seeped in. He hoped desperately he was not misinterpreting what Naruto was really saying here, what he was offering.

"Are you saying you want to be together again? As friends or... "

Naruto smiled ruefully. "There are still a lot of things we need to sort through, but I think... there has never really been a choice for either of us. And you and I both know that we could never be just friends."

Sasuke's eyes darkened, and a short breath of air forced its way out of his lungs. It was going to be ok. Naruto was going to take him back. He felt almost dizzy with the knowledge, not having been able to face the alternative if Naruto had rejected him for good. He wanted to just pull Naruto across the table to him and close the distance. But he heeded the warning that Naruto had given that they needed to talk through things first. He released Naruto's wrist and leaned back in his chair, hoping that a little more distance would help him maintain control.

"So what do you want to know?" His voice came across as controlled, but he knew his eyes were reflecting what he was feeling. Naruto laughed softly at his lover's attempt at a cool and controlled façade.

Naruto looked at their empty plates. Given how uncomfortable this conversation was likely to be, he decided they may as well sit somewhere more relaxing. "Let's sit in the other room for this," he picked up their plates, and Sasuke followed into the kitchen with their glasses. Naruto grabbed the rest of the wine bottle, and they walked to the orange couch and sat down.

Sasuke topped off their glasses, and set the bottle aside. "I see you still have this beast."

Naruto grinned. "It's going to be buried with me."

Sasuke just rolled his eyes. "Well?" he prompted.

"Ok, let's start with the basics. I know you saw a lot of people over the past two years. Are you still seeing anyone now?"

"No. I never saw _anyone_ seriously. They were all one-night stands. And I haven't slept with anyone in more than a year." Sasuke saw no need to beat around the bush with this.

Naruto's eyes widened at that. Sasuke had always been... very sexual, to say the least, with him. The idea of him not sleeping with anyone for so long was a little unbelievable. He hadn't imagined that Sasuke would have felt the depth of loss in the same way he himself had. He had assumed that, even if Sasuke were emotionally crippled and didn't have real relationships, he would still have at least continued to seek physical release with a partner. He would certainly never be short of offers.

"Why?"

Sasuke took a breath, and looked up in the ceiling. Though it went against his very nature, he knew that he had to be completely open now. "Because none of them were you. At first... at first I just wanted you to feel the same hurt I had felt. I went out, I got drunk, and I let whoever wanted to take me home."

Naruto felt his fingers clench at the thought, but he already knew this, and just sat and waited for Sasuke to continue. As much as it hurt to hear it, there was no going back in time to erase it.

"I knew that the press would be interested, so I slept with women to keep the reputational damage to the businesses to a minimum."

"But... you're gay. You're not bi. How did you even..."

Sasuke laughed bitterly. "If you're drunk enough, you can fool yourself into thinking just about anything. You close your eyes, and imagine that the person touching you is the person you want, not the person that's actually there. It's not actually that hard."

Naruto felt the bile rising up in his throat at the mental images that Sasuke's words evoked, but just nodded.

"After I felt like I'd done enough in the public eye, I thought I'd try to find a real relationship. Or at least sex with a partner I didn't have to be nearly unconscious to be attracted to. I went to some gay clubs, and hooked up."

This hadn't been in the press, but Naruto wasn't surprised. He was surprised at how much more it bothered him to think of Sasuke having sex with other men than having sex with women. But he had had sex with Yahiko, and actually cared about him, so he knew he really wasn't in a position to fight about it. The wine tasted sour in his mouth, so he left his glass untouched. He knew that they would have to get over what they had both done. But it would leave scars. Things would never go completely back to the way they had before.

"But you didn't find anyone you wanted to be serious with?"

Sasuke shook his head. "They didn't know me. They liked me for my looks, or for my money or connections. Same as always. I just felt... empty. And I got tired of waking up feeling like that. The alcohol at least dulled the pain, but the sex just made me feel even more alone. So after a while, I just dropped the sex and went straight to drinking."

Naruto looked at his friend. Sasuke had always seemed so invincible and self-sufficient. It seemed foreign to think of Sasuke unable to go on without him, as though he depended on Naruto as much as Naruto depended on him. It wasn't possible.

"Then Itachi woke up and kicked my ass."

"I've always loved that about Itachi."

They both snickered, remembering several instances from their childhood. Itachi had always been the level-headed one of the three. But they sobered as they thought about the more recent past again. Naruto sighed, "But I'm grateful to him. I didn't really believe what I was reading in the papers about you drinking and going off the deep end. It just... didn't seem possible."

Sasuke just looked at him, then looked down, not sure what to say. "When I saw your paintings, I felt the same way. I just had this sick, sinking feeling like - 'oh, god, what have I done.' And at that point, I didn't even know that you hadn't cheated. You've just... you've always been the stronger one, in some ways. It didn't seem that you could really have -"

Sasuke trailed off, not really sure where to go with it.

"Well, I guess we're both just a couple of idiots. It's probably not normal to be the way we are," Naruto wasn't actually joking, but laughed a little anyway.

Sasuke smirked. "I don't think anyone has accused either of us of being normal in a very long time. If ever. Why would you think a relationship between us would be normal?"

They looked at each other for a while, not sure what to say but wanting to push what needed to be discussed, and get everything out in the open so they could begin to move past it.

"Did you sleep with anyone from the office?" Naruto had dreaded asking this question, but he needed to know. He didn't want to stumble into it after they had gotten back together.

Sasuke looked at him in disgust. "Of course not. What the fuck, Naruto? I wouldn't sleep with someone I work with."

Naruto simply raised a brow, clearly remembering many heated moments with one or the other of them bent over a desk, or an office chair, or a conference table, ...

"Present company excluded, of course," Sasuke corrected with an answering smirk, clearly remembering some of those same events.

Naruto rolled his eyes, but couldn't help the flood of relief that washed over him at Sasuke's answer. He knew he was going to just have to accept that what had happened happened. He'd never like it, but he thought he could at least deal with it as long as he wasn't tripping over it in the office every day. He thought about asking Sasuke how many people he had slept with, but decided in the end he really didn't want to know. Whether it was 20 or 100, it still sucked. The number didn't really matter, so he didn't bother to ask. And he didn't really want to find out that Sasuke didn't actually know how many people. He had a feeling it was all a blur to him.

So he figured after putting Sasuke through the wringer, it was his turn.

"Yahiko is the only person I slept with. When I was in Andalusia, I just was a mess. And I didn't want to just get in a relationship with someone when I didn't even know who I was anymore. So much of me was wrapped up in you. It wasn't until I really felt like I was getting my shit together that I considered another relationship. And Yahiko was safe, because I knew it would only go so far with him because of Konan. I wasn't ready for anything serious yet."

Sasuke knew he was scowling. While he was on the one hand glad that Naruto hadn't had a horde of lovers like he had (and yes, he knew that was hypocritical, but it's just how he felt), he also somehow knew that Yahiko was more serious than all of his one-night-stands combined. Because Naruto actually liked him, and they would probably continue to be friends after all of this.

Naruto waited, seeing Sasuke's reaction and knowing that he was still unhappy about the situation. "If I had known I was still married to you, I wouldn't have slept with him. I waited until after I had signed the divorce papers and thought it had gone through."

"Don't be an idiot. I don't think you cheated on me. That's not what I'm pissed about."

Naruto nodded, accepting Sasuke's response. "So then, given that you slept with way more people than I did, why are you so pissed?"

"Because you like him. He's not like the people I fucked. I have no desire to ever see or talk to any of them again. But Yahiko will be around. You do business with him, and you like him as a friend. You like him as more than a friend, too, but are willing to stop that part of it to be with me. But it's still there."

Naruto shrugged uncomfortably. Thinking about it from Sasuke's point of view, he knew he wouldn't like it if Sasuke were still interacting with one of his one night stands. And this had been more than a one night stand. But he wasn't going to just drop Yahiko as a friend, at least... he didn't think that was right. "Yes, I am friends with him. And I do like him as a person. But for the attraction part... there are lots of attractive people in the world, Sasuke. You and I can both recognize when someone is attractive. But when I was with you, there wasn't room for even a spec of desire for anyone else to seep in, no matter how attractive they were. Because I only ever wanted you in that way. And even though I slept with Yahiko, it was only because I never thought I'd have you again. It wasn't that I chose him over you. That would never happen. And if we get back together, things will change with Yahiko. I will never go to his place again, and he'll never come to mine. I'll only meet him at the studio or the gallery, or at the Onyx with other people."

Sasuke still didn't like it. He didn't know if it would be unreasonable to ask Naruto to cut all ties with Yahiko, but he really wanted to. "I don't know if I can handle that," he said honestly.

Naruto nodded unhappily. He understood where Sasuke was coming from. He just didn't know what to say. "So this is something we'll have to figure out. I don't want to hurt you, or make you doubt me. But I also don't want to just dump Yahiko as a friend, because that doesn't seem right. He helped me get back on my feet, and I'm not referring to sex. He has really helped me with my career, and talked me through a lot of insecurities I had about my abilities. I... I don't know what to do."

Sasuke sighed. He didn't blame Naruto for feeling that way. Naruto didn't use people, and he knew that he must honestly like and respect Yahiko for them to have the relationship that they had. It was ironic that the thing that he admired most about Naruto was the thing that made him hate Yahiko so much. "Ok. Just for now, if you are going to be anywhere with Yahiko, I want you to tell me first. And if possible, I want to be there."

"Ok. I can do that," Naruto nudged Sasuke's foot, wanting to lighten the mood a little. The conversation had been emotionally exhausting for both of them.

Sasuke pushed his hair back from his face, his eyes looking around the room and settling on an object in the corner.

"You play?" He asked, indicating the guitar.

Naruto blushed and laughed a little. "I'm learning. I suck, but I like it."

"Play for me," Sasuke said, settling back on the couch.

Naruto got up and picked up the acoustic guitar. He fiddled with the tuning, glancing nervously at Sasuke.

"Um... I've never played for anyone before, so..."

"Just play. I don't even know how to tune an instrument, so I'm not going to judge."

Naruto blew out a nervous breath that had Sasuke smiling slightly, and then he began to play. He played softly, hesitantly. The melody had a Latin feel that Sasuke couldn't place, but it was beautiful. He heard Naruto humming very softly as he played, and Sasuke's heart gave a little lurch. Naruto stopped, and looked over nervously at Sasuke. "So, that's it. That's the best song I can play. I'm going to find an instructor here and start taking lessons, but I just haven't gotten around to it. I know it's kind of crappy, but I just.. it relaxes me."

Naruto knew he was rambling a bit. But he hadn't expected to play for anyone, and he was really nervous and a little embarrassed about it. He wasn't that great at it yet, just mostly fooling around and looking techniques up online.

"Come here," Sasuke said softly, plucking the guitar out of Naruto's hands and setting it on the coffee table. He didn't give Naruto time to actually comply with his demand before he leaned in and brushed his lips softly across Naruto's. "That was beautiful."

Naruto just sat there, his eyes slightly glazed. Sasuke smirked. "Actually, if you find a good instructor, I'd love to take lessons with you."

Naruto blinked. "Wha- oh, right. Yeah, actually, that would be awesome."

It was hard, but Sasuke forced himself to stand up. "It's really late. I should be getting home."

"Oh, right," Naruto blinked, still trying to settle himself back down after that kiss.

"So I'll see you at work tomorrow?"

"Um, yeah. Right. Yes, I'll be in by eight."

"I'll pick you up at 7:30," Sasuke said, immensely enjoying Naruto's struggle to focus.

"Ok. Good night, Sasuke."

"Hn."

Sasuke walked out and got in his car. He knew that if he had pushed the kiss, Naruto would have let him stay the night. But he wanted Naruto to be the one to initiate it. He knew that Naruto was treading water emotionally right now. He wanted to be sure that Naruto was really ready. Of the two of them, Naruto had had the most damage inflicted on him. Sasuke regretted... regretted so much. But there was no erasing it. So he would let Naruto set the pace of their reconciliation. Even if it killed him.

 _Of course_ , he thought, a wicked grin appearing on his face, _that doesn't mean I can't leave a few hints._

-xXx-

Naruto was losing his mind. And it was all the bastard's fault.

After clearing the air the other night, they had fallen into an easy routine. Sasuke would pick Naruto up each morning for work. They'd go through the day as usual at the office. Naruto had found it surprisingly simple to slide back into their old work rhythm. They had lunch together and talked about everything. Sasuke seemed to be giving Naruto space, but that wasn't quite accurate. Sasuke would bring in a report to discuss with him. But instead of bringing an extra copy, he would just bring one, forcing them to lean towards each other. And somehow his breath just _happened_ to brush across the sensitive spot just below Naruto's ear. _Fuck._ Or when Naruto was in the creative design room leaning over the drafting table to review proofs of advertising creatives, somehow Sasuke always just happened to be passing by and would stand right behind Naruto, leaning over as though he had any fucking idea what he was even looking at. He'd stay like that for a few moments, make some random, useless comment about the pictures, then he'd walk away. Leaving Naruto shaking and sweating.

And then had come the morning when Sasuke had walked into Naruto's office and dropped a file on his desk, then walked right back out. Confused, Naruto had opened the file to see the results of a battery of lab tests confirming that in fact, Sasuke had no STDs or any other health issues. And a yellow post-it note on the front in Sasuke's anally perfect handwriting that read: "Just for future reference."

Naruto knew what Sasuke was doing. He wasn't stupid. Sasuke might have decided to let Naruto set the pace, but that didn't mean he was just going to sit idly by.

After work, sometimes they'd go out to dinner, and sometimes Sasuke would just drop Naruto off at his apartment. Sasuke never asked to come up, and Naruto never offered. It was as though they were both waiting for something to happen. Naruto knew that the next time he asked Sasuke up for dinner, he wouldn't leave until morning. They were both ready. But Naruto still felt himself hesitate each evening when they got to his apartment. He'd catch the brief flash of disappointment in Sasuke's eyes when he'd just say goodnight and head up.

And Naruto would go to bed alone, wondering every fucking night why he didn't just drag the bastard up and throw him on the bed. They both wanted it. It was going to happen any day now. So why was he waiting? He bashed his head against the shower wall in frustration. Why was he torturing himself and Sasuke by dragging this out? He had made his decision, and he had told Sasuke that. They had resolved everything as much as it would be possible to do. So what was he waiting for? For Sasuke to invent a fucking time machine and go back and undo it all? It was so stupid. He was being stupid. Again.

He went to bed and lay there awake for hours, trying to understand himself. And he realized that the only thing that was holding him back was fear. Fear that once he slept with Sasuke, he would somehow cease to exist. That he'd once again just be absorbed into Sasuke's incredible aura and drown in his obsession for him like he had before. And the only way to know for sure that he was strong enough to keep himself whole this time around was to risk it again with Sasuke. There would be no magical answer or signal letting him know it was safe. It wasn't a comforting thought.

. . . .

That Friday, they had a morning meeting with a hedge fund owner from New York. Sasuke had been trying to create a retirement fund for their employees, and had looked into different financial vehicles to see what the best options were.

As soon as Naruto saw the guy from New York, he hated him. He was older, his face smooth and shiny from too many Botox treatments. His hair was dyed and styled, his nails buffed and manicured. He was slightly overweight, but tried to cover it up with his expensively tailored suit. But the thing that had set Naruto off against the guy was the arrogance that just oozed from him. It came out in both his expression and in his tone of voice.

At first, Sasuke had been amused. The man clearly had not done his research in knowing who Sasuke was, assuming he was just your average young business man with a medium sized company under his belt. He had no idea that Sasuke had actually spent three years running one of the largest business conglomerates in Japan, and was one of the top ten richest men in Japan as well.

At first, the man had addressed himself mostly to Naruto, for some reason assuming that Naruto was the one in charge. Once Sasuke asked a few basic questions, though, he had quickly dismissed Naruto and focused more on Sasuke. But he largely brushed off the questions, instead moving into full sales pitch mode trying to convince them why they should put all their money with him.

Naruto could see Sasuke getting slightly annoyed, and was glad. He hoped he kicked this guy out of their office before he wasted any more time.

The man was well launched into his sales spiel when Sasuke cut him off. "Look, I understand your projected growth model. But what are the underlying risks in your portfolio?"

The man gave Sasuke a condescending look. "Well, it's a very complicated strategy. I wouldn't expect someone of your background to be able to understand it."

Naruto almost grinned. _Oh, shit. That guy is so fucking dead._

Sasuke smiled slowly, more than a hint of malice lighting up his onyx eyes. He was going to enjoy this. "Well then. Why don't you try to explain it to me. For example, what are your overall liquidity ratios, and do you still use the bond market to mitigate volatility risks, or have you created alternative hedging strategies?"

Naruto couldn't understand anything Sasuke was saying. He just sat back and watched him take the Wall Street man apart piece by piece until the man had been reduced to a stuttering, shaking mess. At the end, the man apologized and almost ran from the room.

Naruto had forgotten how unbelievably hot it was when Sasuke went into full decimation mode. Sasuke just looked over at him and smirked, then headed out of the meeting room to his office. Naruto had to wait a moment before standing up, or he would have revealed to the entire office exactly what he thought about watching his business partner in action.

Naruto walked over to Sasuke's office, aware his brain had basically shut down but completely not caring at this point. He was oblivious to the astute gaze of Shikamaru who had noticed Naruto's expression in the meeting earlier. Naruto also missed the man's wicked grin as he watched Naruto walk purposefully into Sasuke's office and close the door. Shikamaru walked over to Kiba's office. He had a bet to collect on.

* * *

 

Sasuke turned to look over his shoulder as Naruto walked into his office, then went back to searching through the filing cabinet for the document he needed, his back to the blond. It was getting harder and harder for him to concentrate whenever Naruto was around, but he was going to see this through.

"Can I help you?" He asked Naruto, his voice sounding a bit annoyed.

He heard the distinct sound of the lock of his office door being turned. Just that single sound, so small, and his entire body absolutely seized with anticipation.

 _FuckinggodYES,_ Sasuke had to rest his hands on the edges of the cabinet to keep them from shaking.

"Well, are you going to tell me what you need, or am I supposed to just guess," Sasuke's voice almost succeeded in sounding bored and annoyed.

He heard the soft chuckle from just behind his ear, and almost came when Naruto's breath brushed against the back of his neck, and a tan hand reached around to find Sasuke's already throbbing arousal that had sprung to life at the sound of the door being locked.

"I give in," Naruto said huskily.

_to be continued_

So, yeah... **HARD yaoi** ahead. Like seriously. Yes, I could have dragged this out with 500 reasons and interruptions keeping them apart, but that would just be annoying.


	8. Fusion

**Author's note** \- We've all been waiting for it. This chapter is hard core, pretty much all lemon (remember what I said earlier about this not being Disney kind of love? Yeah... I meant that), so if you have a problem with that you should just skip this chapter except for the very last section. But after what I put them through in the first 2 chapters of this fic, I really felt they've earned it. And... they REALLY missed each other. ;-) Brace yourselves.

-xXx-

_Sasuke turned to look over his shoulder as Naruto walked into his office, then went back to searching through the filing cabinet for the document he needed, his back to the blond. It was getting harder and harder for him to concentrate whenever Naruto was around, but he was going to see this through._

_"Can I help you?" He asked Naruto, his voice sounding a bit annoyed._

_He heard the distinct sound of the lock of his office door being turned. Just that single sound, so small, and his entire body absolutely seized with anticipation._

_FuckinggodYES, Sasuke had to rest his hands on the edges of the cabinet to keep them from shaking._

_"Well, are you going to tell me what you need, or am I supposed to just guess," Sasuke's voice almost succeeded in sounding bored and annoyed._

_He heard the soft chuckle from just behind his ear, and almost came when Naruto's breath brushed against the back of his neck, and a tan hand reached around to find Sasuke's already throbbing arousal that had sprung to life at the sound of the door being locked._

"I give in," Naruto said huskily. "I want you so fucking much. I can't even sleep. You've been driving me insane."

Sasuke arched back, instantly shaking with need. "Fuck, yes." He groaned out as Naruto's hand began to pump his erection through his pants. God, he had waited so long for this.

"Stay with me tonight. Spend the weekend with me," Naruto breathed into Sasuke's ear as Sasuke pressed his body back against Naruto's. They both groaned at the long awaited contact.

Sasuke nodded, not entirely sure he even remembered what Naruto had just asked him but he didn't give a fuck. He could feel Naruto's cock pressed against him, and the heat and smell of his lover completely filled his senses. He would agree to anything this man asked him to do right now.

Naruto's right hand continued to stroke him while his left hand slid from Sasuke's shoulder down his arm, then he twined his fingers around Sasuke's, which still had a death grip on the filing cabinet. And then Naruto froze. Sasuke felt panic well up through the heavy haze of his arousal that Naruto was stopping. Oh, god he could _not_ stop now.

Naruto's fingers had brushed against the metal band on Sasuke's left hand. Without thinking, Naruto grabbed Sasuke's hand and pulled Sasuke around to face him. He looked at the wedding band on his lover's finger, immediately recognizing it as the one he had placed on Sasuke's finger at their wedding five years ago. A symbol of love and possession. "You... kept it?" His blue eyes were so transparent and overflowing with emotion Sasuke literally felt like he could see through to the man's soul. Hope, longing, love, and sadness swirled in their depths.

Slowly, deliberately, Sasuke twined the fingers of their hands together, and took a half step forward so their bodies were flush again. "Took you long enough to notice, Dobe. I've had it on since the day you came back to work."

Naruto felt his mind completely disintegrate. He shoved Sasuke against the filing cabinet, likely leaving bruises on the man's back, pressing his entire body flush against his lover's as though trying to merge them together. He fisted his hands in Sasuke's hair and pulled him into an eating kiss. Any ability to express what he was feeling in words had completely evaporated. Sasuke didn't hesitate, leaning in with equal force, his arms closing like a vice around Naruto's body. His hands slid under Naruto's jacket, grabbing the shirt he found there. Their tongues thrust into each other's mouths, the first point of fusion for their bodies and their beings. Their possession of each other's mouths was complete and absolute, showing no weakness or restraint. Sasuke gripped Naruto's hips and pulled their bodies hard against each other, vaguely wondering if the heat between them would simply vaporize the clothing that separated them. They both shuddered as their pelvises ground against each other.

Without breaking the kiss, Naruto's hands slid from Sasuke's hair and he pulled off their jackets, throwing them aside and untucked the expensive shirt from his lover's pants. He slid his hands underneath the thin fabric, feeling the smooth texture of the pale skin over the taut muscles of Sasuke's abs. Remembering the leather couch behind him, he grabbed Sasuke by the waist and pivoted him to the edge of the sofa, then pushed him down on it, immediately climbing over him and straddling him. Sasuke growled and yanked Naruto down hard on top if him, arching up as their bodies were suddenly flush together with all of Naruto's weight creating an almost agonizing friction between their groins.

Naruto braced his hands on either side of Sasuke's head and looked down at him, piercing blue eyes looking both dazed and lust-ridden. He brushed a kiss against Sasuke's cheek almost reverently, then his brow, right below his ear, then brushed another kiss across his lips, then the base of his throat. Sasuke was panting, soaking up the attention he had been denied for so long from his lover. "Fuck, Naruto." Sasuke arched up, increasing the friction even more between their bodies as Naruto undid Sasuke's tie and began slowly unbuttoning each button of his shirt, and kissing along every inch of exposed flesh.

"Too slow," Sasuke growled, sitting up partially and ripping his shirt over his head as two buttons went flying, then yanking off Naruto's. He was beginning to see the benefits of the henleys that Naruto wore under his suits over the traditional button-down. Definitely easier access. There would be time for slow later. After two years apart his body was not going to wait one minute longer. Sasuke lost patience and threw their shirts into a heap on the floor. Naruto's eyes darkened further and he thrust against Sasuke, closing his eyes at the exquisite friction.

With Naruto's shirt removed, Sasuke's eyes latched onto the tattoo that had been revealed. He grabbed Naruto's hips and held them still, feeling like he was about to come just from the sight. Naruto looked down, wondering why Sasuke was stopping things. The sight of his beautiful, coolly controlled business partner laid out beneath him with his eyes closed, cheeks flushed, lips parted and hair disheveled made him want to pound into him until he broke apart. But he also unexpectedly felt a flash of pain, knowing that he was no longer the only person to ever see Sasuke in this state, no longer the only one to know this hidden side of him. But he'd be damn sure he was the last.

That thought had him grabbing Sasuke's wrists and pinning them over his head as he licked, sucked, and bit the sensitive spot at the base of his lover's neck that always made him writhe. Sasuke smiled darkly through a groan, loving the obsessive, possessive look on the blond's face. The sweet façade that everyone associated with Naruto had been stripped bare to the darker side that Sasuke knew Naruto kept hidden from other people. He loved when he could push Naruto past the point of civility, past passion and almost to violence. He loved the explosiveness of how they were together. There was nothing else that even came close to this. People thought of him as the dark side to Naruto's light, but only the two of them knew the truth. How Naruto was the only one to touch the softer side of Sasuke, and how only Sasuke could evoke the darker passions of Naruto, until they blended together as one. At their cores, they were the same.

Naruto let go of Sasuke's wrists as he levered himself lower down the pale man's torso, using his fingers instead to undo the fastenings of the Armani belt and pants that Sasuke was wearing. Sasuke propped himself up on his elbows to watch the blond's actions as Naruto threw the belt aside and slowly pulled down the zipper, blue eyes locked with black. They hesitated for a breathless moment, then Naruto pushed down Sasuke's pants and boxers in one sharp tug, freeing Sasuke's erection. Sasuke's head fell back as Naruto wrapped tan fingers around the base of his marble-hard cock and slowly began to pump.

He hissed out when he felt Naruto's lips close over his head, and his whole body seized in preparation for climax. _Not yet._ Without warning, he rolled Naruto and himself off the sofa, landing hard on the floor with Naruto on his back and Sasuke on top.

They both lay still for a second, Naruto from surprise and Sasuke fighting his impending orgasm.

"Did I tell you..." Sasuke gritted out, making short work of the button and zipper of Naruto's pants while Naruto recovered from having the wind knocked out of him. "How much I fucking love your tattoo?"

Naruto gasped as Sasuke's hand slid inside his boxers and closed around him. Sasuke shifted back until he was kneeling between Naruto's legs.

Naruto tried to make sense of the words coming out of Sasuke's mouth and formulate some semblance of a reply. "Ahnnnn... no but I...unh... gathered that a bit from... when you were at my... _fuck, Sasuke_ ," Sasuke had been slowly stroking Naruto's erection, taking his time to look at the tattoo. Then he had dipped his head and his tongue slid along Naruto's length, pressing along the vein then sliding over the tip. Naruto arched up, his hands gripping almost painfully into the black hair of the man between his thighs.

"What was that you were saying?" Sasuke asked innocently.

"Bastard, I said... _shit!_ " Naruto completely gave up on trying to form a coherent sentence as Sasuke smirked then lowered his head again, repeating the motion but this time not releasing at the tip and instead pulling Naruto fully into his mouth. Sasuke had always had an exceptionally skilled mouth, and there was something incredibly erotic about seeing Sasuke on his knees.

There were so many things Naruto wanted to do to Sasuke right then, but his body was literally locked with pleasure and all he could do was arch into the ministrations of his lover. He tried to pull Sasuke's head up, but Sasuke just chuckled and gripped Naruto's wrists, forcing them to the side and ignoring the stream of incoherent cursing that flowed from the tan lips.

Sasuke felt his own climax building again as Naruto arched up and came hard down his throat. Sasuke quickly pulled himself up and pumped his erection just twice before he came on Naruto's stomach, loving the look of his cum showing against the black of the tattoo. He knelt over Naruto for a moment, panting, and indulging in the primal feeling of possession for having marked his lover. He sighed in satisfaction, and slowly lowered himself to the floor next to Naruto. He looked over at him, watching the blond slowly return to earth.

Naruto looked over, his eyes still heavily lidded as their eyes met. "That wasn't fair."

Sasuke reached up to the tissue box on the coffee table, and tossed Naruto a couple of tissues. "Neither of us were going to last long this time... we can fight for the pin later."

Naruto gave a slow, sexy smile. "Why not now?"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "Already?"

"Now whose memory is getting short?"

Sasuke felt his body heating. That's right... Naruto doesn't get tired. Ever. There had been times when Sasuke had thought he would literally die from pleasure with Naruto's seemingly endless stamina.

Naruto had finished cleaning himself off and threw the tissue in the trash and turned back to Sasuke, who was still lounging on the floor. Naruto's predatory interest in his lover's disheveled state already quite evident in his aroused body.

"Let's get those pants the rest of the way off y-"

The both jumped at a sharp knocking at the door.

"Sasuke-san? The door is locked." The voice of Sasuke's assistant was muffled but audible through the heavy door. "You asked me to remind you when it was ten minutes before your meeting with the government official on the regulatory matter you were to discuss. Did you want me to put the copies of the document in the meeting room, or do you want to take them with you?"

Naruto and Sasuke just looked at each other. "Fuck. We can't blow this off," Sasuke sighed and raked his fingers through his hair. He had to get his head in the game for the upcoming meeting.

"You've got to be kidding me," Naruto said, but Sasuke was already up and searching for his belt, shirt and tie.

"We have to do this. If it were anyone else, we could just reschedule but this guy is in the minister's cabinet. We can't afford to alienate him." He turned and answered his assistant, "You can put the copies in the meeting room. We'll be there shortly."

Naruto knew that Sasuke was right, but he had no idea how he was going to be able to function normally in any kind of meeting. Naruto had never had the emotional control that Sasuke did. He hoped Sasuke had this meeting handled. Naruto would just go and sit there and focus on _not_ jumping his business partner, and call it a success.

Naruto very reluctantly put his clothes on and straightened his appearance. Except for the flush on his cheeks, he supposed he looked presentable. The wrinkles in Sasuke's shirt and the missing buttons were concealed by his jacket, and Naruto couldn't help but feel slightly annoyed at how untouched and put together the man looked. Although, it would give him the pleasure of mussing him up all over again at the end of the day. Naruto freely admitted he had a fetish for taking the outwardly emotionless and arrogant man and breaking him down to a writhing, sweating mass of pleasure. It was one of the many awesome things about sex with Sasuke. The sheer contrast of the man as the business man and the lover. He didn't hold back in either arena, but in one he was cold, controlled and ruthless, and in the other he was... _ok, I really need to not think about that right now if I am going to make it through this meeting._

He eyed Sasuke consideringly as they walked into the board room, fighting down thoughts of exactly what he was going to do to shatter the man later tonight and break apart that controlled exterior. He already knew he was going to be useless in this meeting, not even knowing the topic, so he didn't even bother to try to keep his mind on the matter at hand. He wiped all lascivious thoughts from his mind, however, when they entered the meeting room to find Itachi seated there. The older man seemed to have an uncanny ability to read people's thoughts, and Naruto had always been very careful to not to show all the perverted things he wanted to do (and did do) to the man's baby brother. Itachi was, after all, very protective, and even though Naruto knew that Itachi actually liked him and approved of their relationship, there were still things that Naruto was uncomfortable about Itachi knowing. An almost uncontrollable urge to bend Itachi's little brother over every piece of furniture in the office definitely qualified as one of those things. Evidently Naruto hadn't done as good a job as he thought wiping his intentions from his face, because Itachi just looked at him and raised an eyebrow. Naruto flushed and cleared his throat while Sasuke smirked.

"Hey, Itachi. Good to see you," Naruto tried to keep his voice light but it still came out a bit strangled.

"Itachi, I wasn't aware that you would be attending the meeting today," Sasuke said, arching a brow in question.

"Good to see you as well Sasuke, Naruto. I am glad to see you've changed your mind about coming back to the office." Itachi looked both amused and sincere, and Naruto was glad. He had missed Itachi. Itachi shifted his gaze to his brother. "Actually, Shikamaru called me over just recently. He seemed to think that you two might be... indisposed to take the meeting. Government officials are always so particular about that sort of thing, so I thought I'd come over and stand in for you. But you seem to be..." he came over and minutely adjusted Sasuke's collar, not failing to notice the dark mark it was concealing on Sasuke's neck. "... showing a bit more sense than you did when you were teenagers." His normally emotionless eyes flashed in amusement.

Naruto could think of several instances that Itachi might be referring to, and tried to block them all from his mind to prevent further embarrassment as the government official and his attendants walked in. Itachi smoothly introduced himself, followed by Sasuke and Naruto.

. . . . .

If you paid Naruto a million dollars, he would not be able to tell you what was discussed in the meeting. He could only assume that he answered any of the questions that were addressed to him sufficiently coherently, because Sasuke was not looking annoyed. However, from Sasuke's amused smirk as they closed the meeting, Naruto guessed he was still looking a bit distracted. He only hoped they didn't have a lunch meeting. He seriously needed to clear his head.

Itachi paused next to Naruto's seat on his way out. "It looks like we will be seeing more of each other again, Naruto."

"Yes, you will," Sasuke answered. "But not this weekend. We have other plans."

Sasuke slanted a heavy lidded sidelong glace at Naruto as he and Itachi got up to escort the government official out, and Naruto felt his body heat at just the look. _I'm going to fucking kill him,_ Naruto thought, standing to join Sasuke and Itachi in escorting the man out, fighting down the urge to simply slam Sasuke up against the wall in the hallway in front of his brother on the way back up.

Naruto blew out a breath as he walked back towards his office, not really sure how he was going to get through the rest of the day. He turned instead and headed for the men's room. He had to get a hold of himself. OK, fine, so he and Sasuke had taken a major step in reconciliation today. But he had to be able to be in the same room with him without having almost uncontrollable urges to throw the man to the ground and fuck him senseless. What was he, seventeen again? Naruto went over to the sink and splashed cold water on his face, hoping it would cool him off and get him to focus. They just had to get through the rest of the day, then he would have all night and the entire weekend to do whatever he wanted with his _husband._ Again, that emotionally loaded word went straight to his cock. Oh _fuck, this is NOT helping_.

He wondered in annoyance if he was really going to have to spend the entire day hiding in the men's room or his office because he couldn't get himself under control. Why had he thought it would be a good idea to rekindle their always incendiary sex life in the _office_ in the middle of the _fucking workday_? Oh, right. Because all the blood had left his brain and gone straight to the organ that really didn't care about things like that. He should have known better. They had been apart for too long, and a short tryst on the floor in Sasuke's office was not anywhere near sufficient to satisfy the vortex of need that had opened up between them at the first touch. He supposed he should be grateful that Sasuke at least appeared to have sufficient control over himself. He'd just have to rely on that to get them through the rest of the day. If he stayed in his own office and focused on his own work, it should be fine.

Naruto walked over to the paper towel dispenser and pulled off a sheet to dry his hands and wipe his face. He didn't hear the door to the bathroom open, or the footfalls of the man who entered. So he was startled with a strong pair of arms wrapped around him and pulled him into one of the stalls, which luckily were quite clean and well-kept, finding himself face-to-face with Sasuke.

"You were supposed to come back to my office after the meeting and finish what you started," Sasuke growled in his ear, pushing him up against the wall of the stall. _So much for Sasuke having more restraint_.

Naruto laughed softly, pushing his body forward and backing Sasuke up against the other side of the stall, feeling the electricity run through him at the points where their bodies connected, and from the battle they were engaging in. "If you think that what I have in mind for you is something that is going to be finished that quickly, you are out of your fucking mind. And if you ever leave for a meeting again when I have you half naked, I am going to tie you to my fucking bedpost for the next several _days_. I don't care if the Prime Minister shows up and asks you out for dinner."

Sasuke felt adrenaline surge through his body, flooding him with a tidal wave of arousal. He breathed out a dark laugh. There would never be anyone else that pulled him this way, that could take him to the very edge of sanity and thrust him over it. He grabbed Naruto by his shoulders, spinning the blond around to face the wall and pinning him up against it. "Tie me up, huh? I'd like to see you try it. God, I am going to fuck you so hard. There is no way in hell I'm waiting until we get back to your place," his fingers were already releasing the belt and buttons of Naruto's pants. He pulled a small bottle of lube from his pocket that he had had the foresight to bring with him from his office when he went looking for Naruto. He held the bottle in his mouth while he shoved Naruto's pants down and grabbed the blond's throbbing erection and began to pump.

Naruto pushed his body back against Sasuke's, "Shit, Sasuke..."

Sasuke's hands were shaking when he flipped open the cap of the lube and spread some over his fingers. He knew that they would both be tight after so much time apart. He inserted two fingers into Naruto, trying frantically to undo the belt and clasp of his own pants with his other hand at the same time. He heard the sound of the button of his pants bouncing off the tiles of the floor as it went flying, and didn't give a fuck. Nothing else mattered except what was about to happen between them. Naruto braced his arms against the wall and arched his head back. Sasuke ripped the condom wrapper open with his teeth and rolled in on his aching erection with one stroke.

"Sasuke, you better have your damn pants down by now because if you don't I am going to flip you around right now and _nnnnggghhh, fuck, yes, Sasuke!"_

Sasuke drove in with one hard thrust, and almost came on the spot. He threw his head back, the cords of his neck straining with the effort to hold his orgasm at bay, his chest heaving with the effort. _Two years... two years since I've been with him... two fucking years of hellish nothingness..._ Sasuke swallowed convulsively and shuddered with the intensity of emotion that surged through his body like a physical force. All the lovers he had taken simply faded from existence in his mind. Nothing had even come close to this. For him, there would only ever be Naruto. The constraints of the room and their clothing tore at the edges of his pleasure. _Not enough.. not enough_. Sasuke wrapped his arms around Naruto and pulled his body against his chest, breathing in the scent of him and brushing a kiss on the back of his lover's neck, just below his ear.

Naruto's fingernails dug into the wall. "Oh, god Sasuke..."

"Don't ever leave me again. Even if I try to make you." Sasuke started thrusting. "Don't leave me."

"No, I... wo- ungh... fuck... S'uke."

Sasuke felt his heart lurch at the nickname. Naruto only ever called him that during sex, when his mind was hazed with passion. He hadn't heard it in two years, and it almost sent him over the edge again. He gripped Naruto's hips, thrusting deep and hard and slow, his eyes closed, just focused on the sensation of their bodies being joined, trying to center his mind enough to last just a little longer. He didn't want to come so soon, but his emotions were completely out of control and he knew he wouldn't last long. He pulled Naruto's hips back a little further, changing the angle just slightly, then drove in hard.

"God, _fuck_! Sasuke," Naruto felt his eyes roll back into his head at the intense pleasure as Sasuke hit his prostate dead on. Sasuke felt his control breaking, and he began pumping Naruto's erection so they'd finish together. He hated that they were both trying to keep the sounds of their pleasure in, so the entire office wouldn't hear. He hated the feeling of only partial joining that the clothing allowed. It wasn't enough.

"I really, really hate your clothes right now," Sasuke said in his ear. "Want you in... just your skin... nothing else. Not after waiting... so fucking long... to be with you again."

"I will... ugh.. fucking kill you if you rip my clothes off here. We're... ha... still in the office, bastard."

"Then let's get the hell out of here," Sasuke picked up the tempo, pounding into him and sending them both into a crashing climax.

. . .

Shikamaru sighed. He had noticed that Naruto had headed to the men's room right after the meeting, looking stressed and distracted. He had a pretty good idea why. He had actually been surprised that the two of them had been able to pull it together enough to make the meeting.

Not more than two minutes later, Sasuke had followed Naruto looking... like a stalker, intent clear on his face.

Well, it would likely be rather troublesome if someone were to walk in the bathroom now. Shikamaru went over to the storage closet and took out the yellow plastic sign that the cleaning crew used. He placed in front of the entryway to the men's bathroom. _Closed For Servicing_.

Shikamaru smirked. It wasn't a lie. Someone was definitely getting serviced in there. He heard a muffled groan coming from the room and rolled his eyes, walking over to where Sasuke's assistant was sitting.

"You're going to need to cancel all of Sasuke's and Naruto's meetings for the rest of the day. Reschedule them for Tuesday. They'll be leaving early today and Monday could be questionable as well."

The woman looked at him curiously, but he offered no further explanation. He just turned and headed once again to Kiba's office. He had another bet to collect on. The guy seriously needed to learn how to read people better. He couldn't wait to get home and tell Temari about his day at the office. She was going to die laughing.

-xXx-

Sasuke and Naruto washed up and fixed their appearance as much as possible in the washroom, then headed back to their offices to pack up for the day. Neither noticed the sign as they walked out of the men's room. "We're leaving for the day. Please cancel the rest of my appointments." Sasuke's face was expressionless as he spoke to their assistant.

"Yes, Shikamaru-san already let me know about your change in schedule. I have also cleared Monday's calendar per his request as well."

Sasuke looked over to see Shikamaru standing just outside his office. The brunette looked outwardly bored but his eyes danced with amusement. Sasuke narrowed his eyes and Naruto just busted out laughing. "There's no point in trying to hide anything from him, Sasuke. Just be glad he's on our side."

"Hn," Sasuke said, still feeling a bit unsettled by the brunette's level of knowledge about their personal situation.

"Anyway, we should probably pick up some take-out on the way to my place. Hungry for anything in particular?"

Sasuke raised a brow. "Aren't you going to cook for me again?"

Ignoring their assistant's curious glances, Naruto walked up to Sasuke, speaking softly in his ear. "When I get you back to my place, my mind is going to be on other things entirely. As distracted as you've been making me when we are alone together, I'd probably end up cutting off my hand."

"Take-out it is then."

Shikamaru turned and went back into his office, and Naruto and Sasuke headed for the elevators. On their way, Kiba walked by and bumped his shoulder into Naruto's. "Hey, man. I know he's a total bastard, but just don't completely break him over the weekend, ok? We still need him around here."

Naruto just smirked. He was making no promises. Luckily Sasuke hadn't heard the exchange.

. . .

The car ride to Naruto's house was tense. Neither one really wanted to talk about anything. They had done their talking. What they wanted was to just be alone together, and shut the rest of the world out for at least this weekend. There were unresolved issues between them, but they would be dealt with when they rose up. They had both known that there was no chance of any relationship between them that would be 'just friends' or even 'just lovers'. Their attraction to each other, their possessiveness and obsessiveness would not allow for anything half-way or temporary. They would fight out any remaining issues, and learn to accept each other's pasts, because there simply was no other choice. They would never let each other go.

So the journey was passed in silence, stopping only to pick up the food that they hoped would see them through the weekend.

When they finally arrived at Naruto's apartment, they each carried a bag of take-out and headed up. Naruto unlocked the door, and they entered silently, taking off their shoes and leaving their jackets and phones in the entryway.

Naruto put the food on the counter in the kitchen, then turned to face Sasuke. Finally alone, they looked at each other, almost not daring to breathe in the fear that something interrupt them or somehow disrupt what was about to happen.

They walked toward each other, faces intent. Naruto slid his hands over the Sasuke's stomach then lightly around to his back. He could feel the muscles clench beneath the thin cotton of his shirt as Sasuke slid his hands down over Naruto's ass.

"Let's go clean up," Naruto said, brushing a soft kiss against Sasuke's throat and feeling his pulse pick up.

Sasuke closed his eyes and nodded, feeling his body relax into the privacy they now had with each other, even as his arousal grew. They had the whole weekend. There was no need to rush. The door was locked and their phones left out of reach. It was just the two of them. He groaned slightly as Naruto's tongue continued to trace along his throat and collar bone. They stumbled to the bedroom neither wanting to break physical contact now that they were finally together.

Naruto reached up and undid Sasuke's tie, and Sasuke shuddered as he felt it slither out from under his collar when Naruto pulled it free and tossed it on the bed. They undid the buttons on each other's shirts, taking their time and not breaking eye contact. Both shirts were thrown aside, and Naruto simply watched with undisguised lust as Sasuke slowly undid the fastenings of his trousers and slid them off, standing completely naked in front of Naruto for the first time in two years. Naruto swallowed convulsively. Sasuke's fluid grace and the sheer beauty of his lean, muscled form temporarily rendering Naruto mute. All his memories and fantasies paled in comparison with the reality of this man. Sasuke walked slowly towards him, his fingers closed around the waistband of Naruto's pants. "Take them off."

Naruto blew out a slow breath as he unhurriedly unzipped his pants and took them off. He reveled in the look of almost overwhelming lust that blazed from the dark eyes of his usually stoic lover. Naruto turned and walked to the bathroom, his body lightly brushing Sasuke's, as he went to turn on the shower. He didn't miss the tremor that had shot through the pale flesh at the simple touch.

He turned back to see that Sasuke had silently followed him, and was leaning seemingly casually against the doorframe of the bathroom. His calm expression belied by the rampant arousal between his legs. Steam billowed out of the shower, and Naruto opened the door to the large, walk-in shower and stepped in. He turned and quirked a brow at Sasuke, who hadn't yet moved. "Coming?"

Sasuke levered himself away from the wall and joined Naruto in the shower. He slid his hands along Naruto's shoulders, up his neck, and let them come to rest on the side of the tan cheeks as he drew their mouths together. Just the simple kiss made Naruto feel almost dizzy. His arms went loosely around the pale torso, guiding their bodies just close enough so they brushed lightly together. They stood there for sometime, letting the water flow over them and the kiss grow and deepen, pouring all their pent-up desire and longing into it. They drew back slowly, eyes locked on each other, their breaths coming faster. Naruto slowly reached over and grabbed the soap from the shelf, his eyes not leaving Sasuke's. He lathered the soap between his hands, then slowly began to run them over his lover's body.

They bathed each other, taking time to reacquaint themselves with each other's bodies. Naruto was leaner and harder than Sasuke remembered, and he thought with a twinge about how much damage Naruto had inflicted on himself. But if Sasuke was honest with himself, this harder version of Naruto was dangerously attractive. The tattoo and more clearly defined muscles fascinated him, and he ran his soapy fingers over the contours of the blond's back and stomach repeatedly, learning their texture. As they rinsed the soap away, their caresses became more heated. The tension that had been simmering beneath the surface during the car ride over had been slowly building, and now they were nearly over the edge, all their patience evaporated in the heat of the shower. Sasuke pulled Naruto out of the shower, and they didn't bother drying themselves off as they made their way through the short distance to Naruto's bed. The heat from their bodies was quickly burning off the water there. Sasuke leaned back onto the bed, and Naruto followed him down.

At this moment, there was nothing else on earth that mattered. The entire city could get vaporized, and they would probably not even notice. Naruto reached into the drawer by the bed and pulled out the bottle of lube and an unopened box of condoms. Sasuke looked at the lube and frowned.

It took Naruto a minute to understand the likely source of the frown, but when he did he felt a slow heat of something dark spark in him. "If you are wondering if I ever had Yahiko in here, the answer is no." The frown faded from Sasuke's face, replaced by a possessive look as Naruto continued. "You are the only one I want in my bed."

The sound of a phone going off in the other room briefly distracted them. "I turned my phone off," Naruto said. "You better not even be considering answering that."

Sasuke smirked. "What if it's the Prime Minister?"

Naruto noticed Sasuke's tie on the bed from when they had undressed earlier. He picked it up, sliding the silk between his fingers, looking consideringly at the man lying on his bed. Then he moved suddenly, straddling the startled man and wrapping the tie around Sasuke's wrists, tying a tight knot to hold them there. Sasuke's eyes flared briefly in surprise, then narrowed. They had never tried bondage before. Neither minded when the other temporarily took control, but total submission from either one was out of the question. Naruto read the look Sasuke gave him and leaned in, his lips brushing against Sasuke's ear as he whispered, "I warned you about this, Teme. I wasn't joking."

Sasuke's eyes remained cool and hard. "Untie it."

Naruto's face was amused, but underlying it was something much darker, possessive, and predatory. He levered his body over Sasuke's, forcing him to lie back completely on the bed. Naruto picked up Sasuke's bound wrists, and looked at them for a second. "No, I don't think so."

Instead of untying them, he used the remaining length of silk to bind Sasuke's wrists to the wrought iron headboard, using the leverage he had from being on top to prevent Sasuke from pulling his hands free.

Sasuke gave the binding an experimental tug, but the knots held fast. "Where did you learn to tie knots like this?"

"You always looked down on the Pervert's writing. But there are some interesting chapters. In Icha Icha Bondage, for example, there is an entire chapter dedicated to the different types of knots that one can use in different situations, depending on the configuration of the headboard, the length of the restraint device, and the strength of the person you are wanting to tie down. Complete with diagrams." Naruto grinned evilly. "So this should hold until I decide untie you." He looked down at Sasuke, and felt desire ripple through his entire body at the sight.

Sasuke's hair was still damp from the shower, falling around his face. A stray drip of water slid down the pale throat, coming to rest in the hollow by the man's collar bone. The lean muscles of his arms and shoulders were showcased by the position of having his arms up over his head, the toned muscles flexing as he pulled against the restraint. The chiseled perfection of his pale chest and taut abs were stretched for Naruto's view. The perfect beauty of Sasuke's face was raw and unconcealed, his jet black eyes narrowed in annoyance, not an ounce of fear or submission in them.

"You have no idea what it is doing to me to see you like this, tied up on my bed like a possession, with that fucking arrogant look on your face." Naruto leaned down and blew a hot breath down the side of Sasuke's neck, noticing the goose bumps that spread across the pale skin there. "I am going to make you come until you pass out. I am going to take my time with it. And you won't be able to take control back until I let you."

Sasuke would have been lying if he said that the words Naruto spoke didn't go straight to his cock.

Which, fresh from the shower with their clothing long gone, Naruto immediately noticed. Naruto gave a low laugh, reveling in his lover's inability to conceal at least part of his reaction to him. Sasuke decided there was no point in fighting this. He had no doubt that, even if this pushed him outside his comfort zone, Naruto was more than capable of making good on his promise to make him come until he passed out. It wouldn't be the first time, actually, and the other times it had happened... Sasuke felt his cock twitch in anticipation.

"So, are you just going to talk about it or are you actually going to fuck me?"

Naruto laughed again, and then completely ignored Sasuke's words, using his tongue instead to trace a path down the pale throat, and lave along the collar bone. Sasuke arched his neck back, always sensitive to attention to that spot.

"God, you are so fucking beautiful. No matter how many times I see you, I never get used to it."

True to his earlier words, Naruto took his time. His lips closed over one of Sasuke's nipples, and he pulled gently then let his teeth scrape across it. Sasuke clenched his teeth to prevent any sound from escaping. He knew that Naruto would eventually have him screaming, but he was going to make the blond work for it. He was still trying to decide how annoyed he should be about actually being tied to Naruto's fucking bed. If it wasn't so incredibly arousing, he would have been seriously pissed.

Naruto chuckled, as though reading his thoughts. He climbed between Sasuke's thighs, pushing them open to make space for him to settle there as his nubile mouth sensitized first one nipple then the other. The only sign of the effect that this had on the man tied to the bed was the hard tension in the muscles, and his throbbing erection. Sasuke kept his face looking aloof and disdainful, glaring at Naruto whenever the blond glanced up. Naruto smiled wolfishly at the sight.

"That's right, Sasuke. Fight it. It will just make it that much better when you finally beg."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, knowing Naruto was right and fucking loving it. But he wouldn't let the man see yet. So he threw down the challenge that he was quite sure Naruto was expecting him to. "There is no way you are going to get me to beg, Dobe."

Naruto continued his mouth's journey down to Sasuke's stomach, leaving a trail of hickies. He swirled his tongue around the hard, pale naval, and then dipped his tongue in. A small sound escaped Sasuke's lips, and Naruto breathed a smile against his stomach.

"Don't be so easy, Sasuke. We're just getting started."

Naruto trailed his lips and teeth down along the pale skin of Sasuke's abdomen until he had almost reached Sasuke's cock. He looked up to see onyx eyes latched onto him, following his every move as Sasuke's breathing hitched and became shallow. A sheen of sweat had broken out on the pale chest.

"You have no idea how much I want to fuck you right now," Naruto said, his voice low and raspy with arousal. He saw the slight lift in Sasuke's hips and twitch of his erection at his words. "But..." Naruto said, slowly running his had over the flat stomach and hip bone, stopping just millimeters shy of the engorged shaft. "... I don't think that you are ready yet."

Naruto saw the drips of clear liquid forming at the tip of Sasuke's erection, belying his words. The black eyes that were boring into him were burning with desire, but still controlled. Naruto loved the superb control that Sasuke always had, the challenge of it. He loved seeing it shatter to bits. Sasuke's arms pulled on the binding, but it held fast. "Fuck," Sasuke breathed, unable to keep the word from escaping.

Naruto licked and sucked along Sasuke's hip bone, carefully avoiding touching his erection at all except with his breath. Sasuke's hips thrust more forcefully, a not-so-subtle hint of the body part that Sasuke thought was requiring attention.

Naruto instead placed a series of sucking, open-mouthed kisses down from Sasuke's hip bone along his inner thigh, placing a biting kiss at the back of his knee. Sasuke threw his head back and jerked his wrists against the restraint. "Naruto!" His voice came out in a growl.

Naruto smiled and retraced the path up Sasuke's thigh with his mouth.

"Hmmm," Naruto hummed, his lips back flush against the sensitive skin of the pale inner thigh, just below where it joined with the hip. "Closer. But still not quite begging."

Sasuke's legs moved suddenly, wrapping around Naruto and pulling him closer. Only Naruto's fast reflexes allowed him to brace his arms on either side, preventing contact between Sasuke's cock and his own. He moved his hands to brace against Sasuke's hips as they tried to thrust up and close the distance and alleviate the almost painfully frustrated arousal he had.

"No cheating. Or I'll leave you tied up here and go eat lunch."

"If you do, I will fucking castrate you when I get out of this," Sasuke was panting now, his hands fisting with the urge to tangle in the blond hair and bring the tan lips where he needed them most.

Naruto sat back, grabbing Sasuke's knees and forcing them apart. He kept them pinned there as he bent his head frustratingly close to Sasuke's sensitized organ. He trailed small bites along the pubic bone, not breaking skin but enough of a pinch to give a flash of pain before laving it away with his tongue.

"Holy, god, Naruto, just..." Sasuke arched back and fought to not actually beg.

Naruto blew a hot breath over the head of Sasuke's weeping erection, and touched just the tip of his tongue to lick off the fluid there, but not enough pressure to alleviate any of the burning need for friction and hard contact. He saw with intense satisfaction that Sasuke's eyes were now glazed and unfocused with need, his pale cheeks flushed.

Naruto repeated the motion with his tongue, just a gentle flick across the slit, followed by a breath of hot air over the length of the shaft. Sasuke's hands again jerked against the silk, almost mindless with his need to feel Naruto's mouth _there_. Naruto slid his hands up the insides of Sasuke's thighs, pressing with his thumbs and making small circles until he had almost reached the juncture of where the limbs joined the hips, his tongue darting out again to flick across the tip of Sasuke's cock. He kept repeating this until Sasuke was literally writhing and sweating, curse words pouring out of his mouth.

"Naruto... p... please, just... _oh,godYes!"_

Naruto could count on one hand the number of times that he had heard Sasuke use the word please. So he rewarded him accordingly for the word, deep throating the previously ignored and aching part of his lover's body and slowly sucking his way back to the tip, then releasing it with a pop.

"There, now, was that so hard to say?"

"Fuck you," Sasuke panted, trying and failing to make his voice sound anything other than aroused as hell.

"Later. This time I'm going to fuck you. But first," Naruto bent his head and got serious, sucking and gently scraping along the shaft and head with his teeth, then sliding back down again. He increased the pace and friction until Sasuke came in a white-hot seemingly endless climax, his voice breaking when he shouted Naruto's name.

Naruto was now the one shaking with need as he grabbed the bottle of lube and squeezed out a liberal amount on his fingers. He forced himself to focus on his lover, and the fact that it had been well over a year since Sasuke had slept with anyone. Possibly longer than that since he'd received, as he was pretty sure that Sasuke would not have bottomed for a one-night-stand. The intimacy and vulnerability was too great for a man like Sasuke to allow casually.

Naruto slid one slick finger in while his lover was still limp and shuddering with repletion, slowly working the ring of tight muscle to soften and prepare it. He forced himself to take his time, wanting nothing to detract from the pleasure for both of them after so much agonizing time apart. He slid a second finger in, and felt Sasuke's body stiffen in reaction against the intrusion. Keeping his fingers gently working, remembering perfectly the location of the bundle of nerves inside his lover that made him writhe with pleasure. Naruto slid his body up Sasuke's sweat-soaked form, nuzzling at the base of the pale neck.

"I missed you so much. You have no idea. When I thought I'd never see you again, never touch you again, never feel _this_ again. It was..." Naruto couldn't find the words. His body ached to be joined with Sasuke. They could never be close enough, connected enough. Evidently Sasuke felt it, too.

"Naruto," his voice was rough with emotion. "Let me touch you. I need to touch you."

Naruto nodded wordlessly, needing to feel his lover's arms around him now as well. He pulled the knot and released Sasuke's wrists. Immediately, they circled around him, a pale hand sliding up his back and fisting into blond hair, forcing his head down into a fierce, open-mouthed kiss.

"No more waiting," Sasuke pulled Naruto to him. Naruto quickly rolled a condom over his length, and slowly pushed in. Sasuke's fingers dug into his hips, likely leaving bruises but neither of them noticed, lost completely in the feeling of total fusion of themselves. They lived for these moments, when they didn't have to pretend to be two separate people and could exist as one soul.

"Oh, god, Sasuke," Naruto breathed his name almost reverently. He waited for his lover to adjust to his presence, then slowly began to move. The two years apart had left them torn and bleeding. The short time they had been back together had begun the healing process, but they both still felt raw and aching with need to be together.

Sasuke pulled Naruto back down, devouring his mouth. Feeling his lover's body adjust, Naruto slowly began the deep, languid thrusts, angled perfectly to give his partner shuddering pleasure with each motion. Sasuke felt like he would come out of skin with the intensity of the pleasure that was building again inside him, with each stroke of his prostate. Naruto took his time, adjusting the rhythm and depth to take them both to the peak of orgasm, then backing off just enough to hold them at the edge without going over.

" _Ungh_ , Naruto, _fuck_ ," Sasuke hadn't thought it would be possible for another coil of pleasure to build as intensely as the one Naruto had just released in him, but he felt another tsunami of ecstasy surging over him, and had it then pulled back at the last possible second by the talented lover between his thighs who knew his body and its limits like no one else.

Sasuke felt like he would absolutely not survive if Naruto pulled back again, and wondered if he still had enough strength in him to flip their positions and bring them to a finish. As if sensing this, the next time the pleasure became so acute it bordered on agony for the both of them, Naruto picked up the pace and pounded into Sasuke, breaking them both apart. He fisted around Sasuke's erection, wringing every last drop of pleasure as Sasuke came so hard he literally blacked out for several seconds as Naruto found his own shuddering and endless release. They lay together, panting and dazed, for nearly an hour.

The growling of Naruto's stomach reminded them of more earthly matters, and they staggered to the shower, then to the kitchen for the food that was conveniently waiting for them on the counter.

. . .

Sasuke lay in bed, with Naruto gently massaging his scalp. The weekend had been incredible. He felt as though he had had an extended, out of body experience. His muscles were sore all over, and he reveled in the memories of how they had gotten that way. They hadn't put clothes on the entire weekend, spending their days locked with each other in Naruto's bed, shower, and kitchen floor. He was pretty sure they had broken some kind of record.

But somehow, through his satiation, there was something that was... off. Mentally he shrugged it away. He was probably just having residual feelings of uncertainty given how fast things had moved over the past month... some sort of emotional whiplash moving from hate to love so quickly.

 _Love_. He felt a tiny snake of ice move through his veins as he realized. Despite all the words of passion, want, longing and desire, that word had not been spoken. Sasuke never said it, but Naruto always had. But Naruto hadn't said it even once this time, at least he didn't think so. Why? Naruto wouldn't have taken him back in this way if he didn't love him. Sasuke knew that... he knew Naruto. Naruto had shown Sasuke the depth of his feelings for him. He had said other words that conveyed the same meaning. But somehow it scared him that Naruto hadn't said the exact word. Sasuke knew there must be a reason. But if the words were to come, he didn't want it to be because he had forced them out of Naruto. That would be meaningless. He considered his options.

He turned to face his lover. Naruto lay on his side, his eyes closed, a lazy smile on his lips as he continued to run his fingers through Sasuke's hair.

"Hey," Sasuke said, his voice rough from screaming his release over and over for the past two days.

Naruto's blue eyes opened, and his smile shifted from lazy to sexy. "Mmm," he leaned in to nuzzle Sasuke's neck at the base.

Sasuke felt his body respond, slightly surprised that it still could, and fought to keep some blood in his brain. "Why don't you move in with me?"

Naruto's hand stilled in Sasuke's hair, and his body went rigid. "What?" Naruto resumed kissing Sasuke's neck, but Sasuke wouldn't be distracted. He pulled himself away and sat up.

"I said, why don't you move in with me? My place is plenty big enough. And Itachi told me last week he was going to be moving into his old place now that it is finally ready and everything is out of storage." Sasuke thought it potentially had more to do with Itachi wanting some privacy after Sasuke had grilled him about what Hinata had been doing there, but he didn't want to bring that up right now. He was focused on the expression on Naruto's face. After a brief flash of panic, it had completely closed off.

"I signed a year long lease for this place. I still have seven months left," Naruto looked down, then ran his hand along Sasuke's thigh, making small circles as he inched it closer and closer to Sasuke's cock. Sasuke was fighting a losing battle to control his reaction as his dick rose up in anticipation. Naruto levered himself up so his lips reached Sasuke's chest, and he began laving Sasuke's already tender nipple. "My apartment is closer to my studio, anyway," he said, blowing against the nub and watching it harden. "There's no need to rush."

Sasuke's last conscious thought was that he didn't agree, but Naruto's mouth had travelled south and closed around his cock. Further thought became impossible.

xXx-

_to be continued..._

Yeah, sex is great, but it doesn't solve everything. They still have one more chapter of crap to work through. Once they put their damn clothes back on.

 _**Please review!** _ _I just posted like 9 thousand words of lemon. Give me some love!_


	9. Forever

-xXx-

Naruto woke in the pre-dawn light. His arms were loosely circled around Sasuke's waist, his chest pressed lightly against to the pale back of his lover as they lay together in Naruto's bed. He was still for awhile, feeling Sasuke's slow heartbeat and listening to his rhythmic breathing. He felt with absolute certainty that his place in the universe was here, at this man's side. There was a sense of completeness, and rightness that had been missing the two years that they had been absent.

Sasuke's left hand was resting on the pillow by his head, and Naruto could see the dull gleam of the wedding band in the thin light. And he once again felt the sense of both wonder and unworthiness that a man like Sasuke would willingly bind himself to Naruto. Unconsciously, Naruto tightened his grip on his lover. He could never let him go again. And the thought scared him. This complete dependence on another, this sense of utter devastation awaiting him at the thought of being without him, was terrifying. Because it never made sense in the first place that Sasuke would choose him. But somehow, he had. _For now_ , a small voice whispered in his head.

The question that Sasuke had asked him last night played in his mind. Did he want to move back in with Sasuke? Part of him did. The idea of being back together fully enmeshed in each other's lives tugged at him, compelled him with an almost drugging force. But it also made his palms sweat in panic. Because if he ever let his life fully merge with Sasuke's again, and they were ripped apart once more, he wasn't sure he could survive it. He had been naïve when he was younger, letting himself believe in the fairytale that their romance had seemed. _Some fucked up, gay version of Cinderella_. He snorted a soft laugh at the thought. But in real life, there was too much baggage for it to ever be perfectly 'happily ever after'. Even before the break, he had felt the weight of others looking at him and Sasuke together and judging him unworthy. Wondering what it was that Sasuke could possibly see in him. He had thought at the time that it was enough that Sasuke himself didn't seem to feel this. But Naruto was wrong. Even if Sasuke didn't seem to mind the imbalance in their relationship, Naruto did. But at the same time, he wasn't able to walk away. He could never walk away from what he had with Sasuke.

He looked again at the ring that was on his lover's perfectly tapered finger. He had always loved Sasuke's hands. They were strong, yet beautifully shaped. _He should have been a musician or an artist with fingers like that_ , Naruto thought idly. The sight of his ring encircling the finger on Sasuke's hand mesmerized him. And also filled him with guilt, as he looked down at his own bare finger. He suppressed a sigh, instead drawing comfort from breathing in the scent of his lover at the nape of his pale neck. He resisted the urge to nuzzle Sasuke's neck, not wanting to disturb his slumber.

"You're thinking too loudly for this time in the morning, Dobe."

Naruto smiled, burying is face in Sasuke's neck and breathing deeply now that the damage was done and Sasuke was already awake. Naruto had many 'favorites' about being Sasuke's lover, but this was definitely one of them. He loved the man's scent, so clean and masculine. Sometimes he wondered if Sasuke had some genetically mutated pheromones that were responsible for the instant lust he aroused in everyone.

Sasuke relaxed against Naruto, enjoying the simple display of affection after several days of much more heated acts. He pulled Naruto's arms more fully around him, and looked down at the tan hands clasped by his own pale ones. Naruto's finger traced over the wedding band, and Sasuke tried to not feel hurt that Naruto's finger remained bare. He wondered if Naruto had kept his ring, or if it had been discarded as he himself had considered doing. He wanted to ask, but didn't want to disturb the peace of the morning. Ever since their short conversation last night about Naruto moving in with him, he had felt suddenly as though their relationship was back in limbo. He didn't want to make a wrong step now that they had come so far, but it was difficult for him to hold back when he usually did not. Hesitancy was not a natural mode of operating for him. He wondered how much longer he'd be able to maintain this more passive stance in their relationship.

"I want you to come with me somewhere this morning, before we go to the office," Naruto said softly, his breath brushing against Sasuke's neck.

Sasuke looked at the clock. It was barely 6 am on Monday morning, so they had some time. Though he still had to go back to his place for a change of clothing. They hadn't left Naruto's apartment since they had arrived Friday afternoon, and he hadn't brought anything with him except the food.

"Where?"

Naruto hummed a little, a nervous habit that Sasuke remembered from before. "My studio."

Sasuke turned to face Naruto, waiting for more of an explanation, but none was forthcoming.

Naruto stood, pulling Sasuke with him. "Let's take a shower and call the office to let them know we'll be a little late. Shika had our meetings cancelled for today, so it should be ok."

An hour later, they found themselves at Naruto's studio. "So... what are we doing here?"

Naruto didn't answer, but he went over to a small box that was in the corner of the room. He squatted down, and opened it, taking out a small, shiny object. Sasuke felt his stomach clench as he realized what it was. Naruto stood, looking a little uncertain, "Well, I figured if you were going to wear yours, I should wear mine, too."

Sasuke felt a small flash of relief as he realized that Naruto had not thrown his wedding ring away. But he didn't really like the reason that Naruto was giving him for why he was putting it back on. His hands covered Naruto's, stopping him from placing the ring back on his finger.

"No. Don't wear it just because of that."

"I'm not. I... I remember what we said when we exchanged rings. For me, that still stands."

Sasuke pulled the ring from Naruto's hand, and slowly slid it back on the blond's finger, then drew him towards him. Their lips brushed together first gently, then more aggressively.

They ended up being very late to work.

. . . . . .

The next several weeks were amazing in some respects. Naruto and Sasuke spent every night together, sometimes at Sasuke's, and sometimes at Naruto's. Wherever they were, they spent their nights locked together in heated embraces, as though making up for all the time they spent apart. They had given each other keys to their apartments, and had moved a few changes of clothing and extra toiletries making the overnights more comfortable, and not requiring either of them to rush back home to change before work.

The locks on their office doors got frequent use, and their assistant got used to abrupt changes in their calendars. The people in the office regularly exchanged knowing smirks and indulgent looks when they'd catch the heated glances and soft smiles shared between their bosses.

But as much as Sasuke loved this return of physical closeness, and the return of his business partner and friend, he increasingly became aware of the piece that was still missing. It felt like they were... dating. Which he understood on some level as being necessary given the nature and extent of the rift, but he also found it unsettling when they seemed to stop progressing in their relationship. Things had been getting steadily better, and now they had plateaued after about a month, and he was beginning to be concerned that this was as far as the reconciliation would go. Sasuke sat in his office, staring blankly at a series of financial reports he was supposed to be reviewing.

Abandoning the façade of appearing to do work, he set the papers down and looked up at the ceiling, lacing his fingers behind his head. He supposed that the reason he was feeling unsettled was that he didn't really understand what the barrier was that remained between them. The enormous wall of anger, hurt, and mistrust that had been created by their break-up two years ago had been torn down. Somehow - and Sasuke still felt almost religious when he considered how miraculous it was - Naruto had forgiven him. Really, honestly and completely forgiven him. It again humbled Sasuke to realize how much Naruto was the better man. He knew that if the roles had been reversed, he would not have been able to do the same, at least not without exacting equal vengeance first.

But somehow, even with that wall gone, Sasuke felt a thin barrier between them that had not been there before. The most obvious manifestation of it was that Naruto didn't want to discuss moving in with him. And Naruto still had not said the actual word 'love' since their reconciliation. But there were other, less visible effects as well. In the past, there had been no boundaries between them at all. They shared all their thoughts, all their experiences, all their emotions. And while much of it had returned, it was not the same. There were differences.

Some of it stemmed from the simple fact that they had lived two years apart, and each had had major life events occur during that period that had shaped them, without the other. And they were no longer the only lovers each other had known. Over time, as they continued to talk and tell each other things, this gap was closing but would always be there. They'd never go back to the two boys who had been inseparable and gone through everything together. But that change was surmountable, and he could and would learn to accept that.

He sensed, however, that the real issue was something that went beyond this, and Sasuke didn't really understand _exactly_ what it was. And he didn't know how to talk about it with Naruto either, without sounding clingy (which he absolutely refused to be) or emotionally needy (which he most definitely was not). But he wasn't content to just sit back anymore. While he loved having sex with Naruto, and working together again, it wasn't enough. He wanted _all_ of Naruto back. He looked down at his desk. Naruto had warned him that he needed to work late tonight, going over the final proofs for a new advertising campaign with one of their agencies. He had told Sasuke to go ahead and have dinner without him, and he'd meet him back at Sasuke's place late in the evening.

Sasuke picked up the phone and dialed.

"Nii-san."

" _Little brother. Good to see you finally come up for air enough to remember the rest of the world."_

Sasuke snorted softly. He knew he had been spending every free moment (and many moments that were not actually free but had been reallocated anyway) with Naruto for the past several weeks. He also knew that Itachi not only understood but approved.

"Naruto has to work late tonight. I was wondering if you had plans for dinner."

Itachi paused, and Sasuke knew that his ever insightful brother was likely already processing possible reasons for his uncharacteristic request to spend time together.

" _Of course, Otouto. Do you want to go out, or should we meet at my place?"_

"Your place... we don't need to go anywhere formal. I'll just pick some food up on my way over."

Itachi correctly assumed that the reason had more to do with Sasuke wanting to talk privately, but felt no need to mention that.

_"I'll be finishing up in the office by 8pm... I'll meet you at my apartment at 8:30."_

"Hn."

They both hung up, neither feeling the need for the obligatory phone etiquette of 'hello' or 'goodbye'.

. . . . .

Sasuke pulled in to the parking garage at the same time Itachi did, so they walked up together. Sasuke noticed fresh flowers on his brother's dining room table, and other signs of a feminine touch, but when he asked Itachi about it the older man simply raised a brow but remained silent.

Sasuke sighed, knowing that if his brother didn't want to talk about something, then the conversation would not happen. So he dropped the subject.

They discussed business over dinner, catching each other up on the performance of the companies and major events that were upcoming. After they had finished eating and cleared the food away, they went to Itachi's study, where he poured them each a glass of port.

"How are things going with you and Naruto-kun?" Itachi knew the real reason for this visit must have to do with Naruto, given that Sasuke had chosen to come at a time when Naruto was clearly unavailable.

Sasuke thought briefly on how best to answer that question. With Itachi, the direct approach was generally best since the man was able to see through any attempts at obfuscation anyway. "We spend every night together. And he seems to honestly not be holding a grudge despite the fact that I almost completely destroyed his life two years ago. He is even wearing his ring again."

Itachi looked at his brother, knowing there was more coming. "But?"

Sasuke sighed. "But he doesn't want to talk about moving in with me, and he hasn't said in words that he loves me, although he has shown it in every other regard. There just feels like there is this... separation between us that didn't used to be there. And it's not going away, even though we've been back together for more than two months. He's holding back. Up until this point I've been letting him set the pace. We progressed to a certain point but now we're just... stopped. There's something holding us apart, and I don't know how to break through it."

Itachi sighed, and thought for a moment, taking in what Sasuke was saying and aligning it against what he himself knew. "When Naruto came to see me in the office that first time, he said that you told him that the reason you were ending things with him was that you were bored with him, and that he wasn't good enough for you. That he couldn't hold your interest any longer."

Sasuke looked down, his fist clenching as he remembered the words he had spoken on that night years ago. "Yes. I said that. I said... many things that night."

"Tell me," Itachi said flatly.

Sasuke wished he didn't have to. He wished he didn't remember every vivid detail of that worst night. But he did. So he told Itachi, seeing the sadness on his brother's face as the words spilled out. Feeling the guilt clawing back in at the memories of how he had methodically set out to destroy the person he loved. And succeeded with frightening results.

He kept eye contact with Itachi, not shirking from whatever judgment his brother might have for him. Whatever disgust Itachi might feel for what Sasuke had done, it would fall immeasurably short of what he felt for himself.

At the end of it all, there was silence. Finally Itachi spoke. "Well, you certainly know how to go for someone's weak spots."

Sasuke sighed. "I... have never regretted anything so much in my entire life."

"Naruto is an amazing person that he was able to get past it as much as he has. I would not have been able to, I think, no matter how much I had loved a person."

Sasuke nodded, feeling the same. "I hadn't expected him to forgive me. I had thought it would be over, or maybe just friends at best."

"He truly loves you."

Sasuke nodded, somehow feeling even worse.

"But you knew him well, and you knew just what to say that would break him. Even if he has somehow decided he understands why you did what you did, and he has forgiven you, the wounds you made left scars. Deep ones, because they touched on old wounds that others had left before you."

Sasuke's eyes sharpened at the words, as Itachi continued speaking.

"What if Father had told you that he didn't want you as his son anymore, because you were not good enough? That you didn't live up to his expectations, or that you didn't live up to my record?"

Sasuke fought not to flinch at the dark emotions that swirled through him at the abrupt mention of their late father, and the direct hit on his insecurity of always being 'less than' Itachi, and never quite good enough. Countless teachers had made remarks to him of being 'almost as smart as his brother'. Relatives always comparing the two, reminiscing of what Itachi had been able to accomplish by the same age, and Sasuke always falling short. Of course Itachi would know how to tap into his deepest insecurities. Sasuke narrowed his eyes, understanding why but not liking the approach his brother was taking.

"Yes, even thinking about that hurts, doesn't it? And if he had said it, and held to it for weeks or years, thrown you out of the house, what would that have done to you? Even if later he admitted that he never actually felt that way, that it wasn't true, that he had only said it to motivate you to strive harder. You would never really believe it. You would always believe that somehow the anger had brought out the truth, no matter what he said later. Because his words would have echoed thoughts you were already having. Even though I know for a fact that father never felt that way, I know that _you_ did. I think that for Naruto, it is the same. You are the person who matters most to him. Your view of him as an equal, your acceptance of him as the one person you have chosen above all others to love. He doesn't understand why you chose him. He has always felt unworthy, because so many people throughout his life have told him so. When you said what you did to him, he believed it because it was reflecting what he already felt about himself. The seeds of his doubt and fears had been there long before the words were said. The words only hardened and reinforced those beliefs. So taking the words back might earn you forgiveness, but that won't undo the damage that they inflicted."

Sasuke sat, absorbing the words and their implications. "So... then what can I do? He is holding back because he doesn't believe I really want to be with him, then -"

Itachi held up a hand, stopping him. "It's more complicated then that, Sasuke. Naruto probably believes you want to be with him, at least on some level. But he doesn't understand why, so he doesn't trust it. He likely feels that at some point, you're going to wake up and see what he sees - that he is not worthy of you. And then you will leave him. Again. So he is trying to keep some separation, so that when it happens, he doesn't have to go through what he did last time."

"So then I need to make him see what I see. I need to make him see what I see in him, and why I... care so much for him."

Itachi rolled his eyes. "You can't even say it, can you? That you love him. Not just 'care so much' for him. You love him. And you need to tell him. He deserves to know it. And you need to show him. You need to prove to him what matters in your life, and what doesn't. Or what you have now is all it will ever be. He won't leave you, but he will never be as close as he was before. He won't trust your relationship without a rather large effort on your part. You're not a passive person, Sasuke, and Naruto won't expect you to be. The man he loves is the real you, not someone afraid to take a stand on something that is important. If you continue to let him do one hundred percent of the driving on this, he will assume it's either that you feel the same hesitancy he does, or that it isn't worth it to you to fight for."

Sasuke sat there, thinking about how to say what needed to be said. How to convince Naruto that he would never get sick of him, that he never felt like Naruto was less than him. Itachi saw him to the door, and Sasuke drove back to his apartment deep in thought.

It was quite late when he got back to his apartment, and Naruto had already showered and gone to bed. Sasuke had a small plan beginning to form. But he wanted wait until they could talk through everything, when they wouldn't be rushed by outside obligations. He would just have to wait until the weekend. But that didn't mean there weren't other ways he could show Naruto exactly what he felt about him. Sasuke showered quickly and climbed into bed completely naked. Naruto was sleeping on his side in just his boxers, and Sasuke snaked an arm around his waist and slowly spread his palm across the tan stomach, feeling the warmth of his lover's body, and the tautness of the muscles there. Naruto breathed out, shifting slightly then falling back deeper into sleep. Sasuke smiled darkly, licking the back of Naruto's neck and kissing the nape of his neck, seeing the goose bumps appear.

"Naruto," Sasuke whispered against his ear, then scraped his teeth against the lobe, his hand sliding along Naruto's stomach and down over his hip. Naruto groaned in his sleep, arching back but still not fully waking.

Naruto had always been a very sound sleeper, but the first hour after he falls asleep he is almost impossible to waken. Sasuke realized Naruto must have fallen asleep quite recently, and smirked. Deciding to take full advantage, and not feeling the slightest bit of guilt, Sasuke slid his hand down into Naruto's boxers, feeling the erection that was already forming there. Clearly Sasuke's presence had penetrated into Naruto's sleeping consciousness.

Sasuke reached over to the nightstand for the lube and slicked his fingers, then slowly pumped Naruto's erection until he was fully hard. Sliding off Naruto's boxers and tossing them to the side, he closed his mouth over his sleeping lover's cock and began to lightly suck, slipping a lubed finger into Naruto's entrance.

Naruto's hands twisted into the sheets, "Nngghh... Sasuke," Naruto mumbled, still not fully waking, but his body writhing as the sensations took over his dream. Sasuke reveled in the fact that even in his dreams, Naruto knew it was him and no one else touching his body. Sasuke inserted a second finger and picked up the pace and suction. He felt the muscles in Naruto's abs start to tighten, and he pulled back, positioning himself between the blond's thighs, replacing his mouth with his lubed fingers. He slowly drove in, just as Naruto clenched into orgasm, blue eyes flying open in unfocused, piercing pleasure. Naruto's gaze latched onto the wicked face of his lover smirking above him, his senses reeling.

"Honey, I'm home," Sasuke said, thrusting in and lifting Naruto's hips so he hit his prostate.

"Holy fuck, Sasuke," Naruto shuddered, already feeling arousal tightening his body again as the erotic vision that Sasuke had infused into Naruto's dreams blended with reality. Sasuke laughed, a rare sound, and proceeded to keep the both of them up until late into the night.

-xXx-

It was finally Friday. Naruto had knocked on Sasuke's door to see if he was ready to leave, and they had quickly packed up together to head home. They took the elevator down to the parking garage, and got into Sasuke's car.

Sasuke had been debating whether to ease into the topic or dive right in. In the end, he decided to stick with the approach that tended to work best for him, and be direct. Itachi was right. There was no sense pretending to be someone he wasn't. Plus, there was too much risk that the small degree of separation would grow and doubts would start to creep back in on both sides. It was not a risk he was willing to take. He had waited two months. That was more than any sane person could have expected him to hold out.

"I've been thinking about selling my apartment," Sasuke said without preamble. "I have a realtor coming tomorrow afternoon to talk with us about it."

Naruto's head snapped up, looking over at Sasuke.

"Why?"

"Well, it just seems a waste. We have been spending more time at your place since it's located between our office and your studio. Of the two, it makes sense to keep yours. Plus, it does have some rather good memories from our first weekend back together." Sasuke slanted a glance at Naruto, then refocused his eyes on the rush hour traffic.

Naruto smirked at the images that he recalled, but then sobered as he thought about how to respond to what Sasuke was actually saying.

"So... you want to move in with me?"

Sasuke shrugged. "It makes the most sense."

"I don't think my closet could hold even a quarter of your clothes," Naruto hedged.

"I could put some into storage. It doesn't really matter." Sasuke seemed very firm that this was what he wanted.

Naruto was silent, trying to process how he felt about this, and what he should say to Sasuke. "My place is really small compared to yours. And it's not exactly an impressive address."

"So? It's not like I do a lot of entertaining at my place. If we have to do something formal, we'll either do it at a restaurant or at Itachi's. It doesn't matter."

Naruto heard the subtle stress on the last two words. "But you've always lived in really formal, expensive places, I just can't imagine you -"

Sasuke glared over at him, cutting him off. "Why do you think I care about any of that at all? My family comes from money, yes, so I grew up with expensive things, fine. But that doesn't mean I care about that. It was just more of a habit, and following up with people's expectations. I asked my realtor to find me a place, and he picked one that matched his expectations with what he assumed I wanted."

Naruto shifted in his seat. This was unexpected. Why was Sasuke wanting to move into his much smaller, much less nice apartment? He knew that Sasuke was trying to make a point with this. But he was not sure he wanted to push too hard on what that point was, because he had been trying very hard to avoid the subject entirely. But apparently, Sasuke wasn't going to let the topic drop.

"Why don't you want to talk about moving in with together?"

Naruto looked down, shrugging. "I'm not saying I don't want to live together at all. But it just feels like something we don't need to rush into. I mean, we sleep together every night. It shouldn't matter if we have one place or two."

Sasuke looked at him, trying to decide if Naruto was trying to dodge the question, or if he really didn't know the answer himself. He was leaning towards a combination of the two. They had arrived at Naruto's place, and Sasuke parked the car in silence.

They walked up together, Sasuke using his own key to let them into Naruto's place. They removed their shoes in silence, and headed into the kitchen.

"Naruto, I want to take the next step. We're stuck in a holding pattern and it's making me crazy. This isn't enough for me. I don't want to feel like we're still just dating. I don't want to just be 'business partners with benefits'. I need you to let me back in, all the way."

Naruto tensed. He wasn't sure he was ready for a confrontation on this. He took off his jacket and tossed it on the back of the kitchen chair, trying to organize his thoughts. It was true that he felt somewhat less panic at the idea of Sasuke moving in with him, than he did about moving into Sasuke's place. But he just couldn't see it really happening. He turned to face Sasuke, who was leaning against the counter, waiting for his response.

"Let you back in? What are you talking about? We work together every day and we sleep together every night. We spend all of our time together. How much more 'back in' is there?"

"There's more. And you know it. It's why you don't want to move in with me. It's why you won't..." Sasuke cut off. He wasn't going to push Naruto to say he loved him. He knew that had to be earned, not demanded. Sasuke needed to earn it, and he had a pretty good idea what it would take. He just needed to man up and get there.

"You don't trust me like you used to. It's... not the same." Sasuke's voice sounded rough. Naruto tensed, not knowing what to say, but afraid silence would be interpreted the wrong way.

"I do trust you, Sasuke. We've talked about all that. No, I'm never going to be happy about what happened, just like I'm sure you aren't, but I accept it. I have moved past it. We're together again. I understand why you did what you did."

"But do you understand that I didn't mean what I said that night?" The intensity in Sasuke's voice pierced through Naruto, their eyes locked. "Naruto, I could _never_ get tired of you. You are worth more to me than everyone else I have ever met combined. I was trying to hurt you, but it wasn't true. It wasn't what I felt at all, I -"

"Sasuke, I know. I get it," Naruto held up his had when Sasuke started to speak again. "But you were right, Sasuke. You might not have really believed it at the time, but what you said was actually the truth. When you said that I was not enough for you, when you said that I didn't have a life of my own outside of yours... you were _right_. When it came time to pack up everything that was actually mine, there was surprisingly little of me in that house... surprisingly little of me in our lives. Because after all the years we had spent together, there was really not much of me left. It wasn't a relationship between two people. I wasn't your spouse, Sasuke. I was your fucking shadow."

Sasuke's eyes widened at the characterization, and Naruto stopped him again from speaking. "I know it wasn't your fault. It was mine. I was so fixated on you, so _obsessed_ with you for so long, that I didn't even exist separate from you. Everything I did with my life from the time we were kids, I did with an underlying thought as to whether it would please you, or whether it would make me closer to being an equal to you... someone suitable to be your partner. And when I realized that, when I realized what I was, I hated myself for it. And so I had to start over. I worked hard to become an actual person again, with thoughts and opinions of my own. But when I'm with you... it's like all of that just fades away. All I can think about is you. And I can never let you go. But I just need... somehow... to keep some separation, so that I never wind up losing myself again. Because if I let myself go, and something like this ever happened again, I just... I can't go through that again. I need to know that I am able to function on my own. And moving in with you just... messes all that up for me right now. I feel like I would just disappear again. You are such an amazing person. You have no idea how easy it is for someone like me to just get swallowed up."

Naruto finally ran out of words, and stopped, meeting Sasuke's unflinching gaze. Slowly, the raven drew a breath.

"Do you really think that we are both complete _idiots_?" Sasuke's voice was almost shaking with some emotion that seemed a blend between anger and hurt and something else.

"What?"

"I mean, after a mistake like this, do you really think that neither of us learned anything from it? Do you think for one minute that I would ever risk losing you again without confronting you? Let me tell you something, Naruto. I _learn_ from my experiences. And what I have learned over the past two years without you is that my pride is worth fucking _nothing_ if it means I have to go through the hell of living without you. Do you know how many nights I drank myself to sleep just so I wouldn't have to listen to that little voice in my head telling me what a colossal mistake letting you walk out of my life was? Do you have any idea how lifeless and empty I was without you?

"Naruto, you say that you feel like you were not enough for me, somehow less than what I am. What a fucking joke. All I am is the son of wealthy parents. What did I ever do that was so amazing? I was born into a family business, trained to run it since I was little, with an army of well-paid geniuses to support me. And my looks? Again, inherited. So what did I ever do that was so great? I'm not a particularly nice person. I don't shove little old ladies in front of busses, but... I don't go out of my way for people. But you came from nothing. You built everything that you are on your own. You had shit thrown at you your entire life, from birth on, and you are still probably the most honest and principled person I know. Anyone else would have been bitter and focused on looking out only for themselves. But you just rose above it all. You have an indomitable spirit, despite having had to work for absolutely every last thing you ever had. And you are probably one of the only honestly _good_ human beings I have ever met. If anyone in our relationship is unworthy, it's me."

Naruto was stunned at the words pouring from Sasuke's mouth. He had never heard Sasuke bare so much of his emotions before. He had never considered that Sasuke might think anything like this, that it could be possible for anyone to view him in such a way. He couldn't process it.

"You were the one truly good thing in my life. And I broke you. I can't fucking handle it. I need you, Naruto. I need you to love me and trust me like you did before. But, I feel like somehow, I'm no longer good enough. That with everything I did to you, and all the people I slept with, you will never feel the same about me. Tell me what I need to do. God, I would give anything to have it like it was, just - " he took a step forward to close the distance between them, his hand on the base of Naruto's throat holding his chin as he brushed his lips across Naruto's, gentle and aching. "I need this to be fixable. I need-"

"Shhh," Naruto's heart ached, and he took his lover's face in his hands, kissing the dark eyes that were filled with anguish. "Sasuke, don't. It's ok. You don't have to say anything more."

"No. I always thought that words didn't matter... that it was what a person did that either showed love or disproved it. And while I still believe that, I can't take the risk of leaving the words unsaid anymore. I need you to know how I feel. I know I'm not one of those people who are good at words like this. But I _love_ you, Naruto. I have loved you for as long as I even knew what that word really meant."

Naruto's who body seized at Sasuke's words... words that Naruto never actually expected to hear.

"God, Naruto. You were never my fucking shadow. You were my _soul_. Without you I was just an empty shell. I didn't even feel human. As much as you felt like you were incomplete without me, it was a hundred times worse for me. I need you back, and I don't care if I have to give up the company, my apartment, or anything else. I just need us to be together again. I can't bear the separation. If you think you were obsessed with me, you have no idea how much more I feel for you."

Naruto's hands were shaking when he reached for Sasuke's face. He brushed his lips across Sasuke's, feeling a shudder run through his lover's body at the light touch. "Sasuke - god, I..." Naruto crushed their bodies together. He pulled Sasuke's jacket off and dropped it on the kitchen floor as Sasuke pulled off Naruto's shirt and threw it across the room.

They were halfway to the bedroom when the stumbled against the wall in the hallway, Sasuke looking at Naruto with onyx eyes overflowing with emotion. He didn't want to have to ask for the words, but he felt like he would die if Naruto didn't tell him what he needed to hear. "Naruto, I need -"

Naruto slid his hands up Sasuke's neck and kissed him. "I know. God, I know and I'm sorry. I love you Sasuke. I never stopped loving you... I don't even think it is physically possible for me to stop. I will never understand why you love me, but I... _fuck!_ "

At Naruto's words, Sasuke had thrust his hips hard against him, pressing him into the wall. "I will make you understand, Usuratonkachi. I'm not going to let you push me away or shut me out."

"Show me, then," Naruto said, working the buttons on Sasuke's shirt.

A slow smile spread across Sasuke's face. He tugged his shirt, ignoring the fate of the remaining buttons and tossing it aside. "I'm moving in with you next weekend," he said, his mouth moving along Naruto's jaw. He scraped his teeth over the sensitive skin behind Naruto's ear, and smirked when he felt the body beneath his hands tense and harden further.

He felt the heat of his bare chest against Naruto's, and reveled in the feel of their hard bodies pressed together. Sasuke slid his hand into the waistband of Naruto's trousers and pulled him to the bedroom, keeping their bodies flush together while walking backwards. He grabbed Naruto's shoulders and pushed him down on the bed, then positioned himself between Naruto's thighs. Sasuke's eyes never wavered from Naruto's as he slowly undid the fastening on the blond's pants, then pulled the zipper down. The side of his hand brushed against Naruto's arousal that was already rock hard and straining at the fabric of his boxers.

"Shit, Sasuke," Naruto's hands fisted in Sasuke's hair and pulled their mouths together as pale hands slowly pulled Naruto's pants and boxers down, tossing them aside.

Naruto slid his hands down Sasuke's neck, over his back and settled on the waistband of his pants. "Ahhhnnn, Sasuke," Naruto gasped as Sasuke's tongue trailed up his throat, while pale fingers closed around his erection. Naruto tried to keep focus enough to quickly undo Sasuke's pants and shove them down. Sasuke helped by kicking them the rest of the way off so finally they were naked, tangled together on the large bed.

Sasuke brushed his hand over Naruto's hip, then traced the pattern of the circular tattoo with his fingers. His mouth was busy leaving a trail of bites along Naruto's collar bone, laving away the sharp sensation with his tongue.

Naruto's hand fumbled over the nightstand, searching for the lube. "Sasuke, I don't want to wait."

Sasuke grabbed his wrist and pulled it up over his head. "No rushing. You told me to show you."

Sasuke slid his body down along Naruto's, trailing small bites and licks on his path down to Naruto's hip bone, his hand continuing to pump along his hard dick.

"S-S'uke," Naruto felt his blunt nails dig into the pale shoulders. _"Fuck!_ "

"Absolutely," Sasuke said, making good on his word.

-xXx-

Gaara hung up the phone and looked at the pale-eyed, raven haired woman who was in his office. Only people who knew him exceptionally well would recognize the small quirk of his lips for the smile it was. "Evidently someone tried to access the medical school transcripts of one Haruna Sakura yesterday."

Hinata cocked her head to one side. "Of course, eventually Sakura will get this all sorted out. She will have her professors at the medical school who will be able to write letters of reference for her."

Itachi smirked. "That works better in Japan, where the physicians are better known and the person calling speaks Japanese. It will be more challenging given that the request for reference came from the Canada."

Gaara nodded. He looked at Hinata consideringly. "I think that your father and cousin underestimate you considerably."

Hinata simply smiled softly. She glanced over at Itachi, met his wicked, knowing gaze briefly, and blushed.

. . . .

"What do you mean there is no record of me ever attending medical school?! I graduated second in my class, and did my residency at one of the most prestigious hospitals in Japan!"

The head of HR for the hospital chain looked at her skeptically. "There is no record of you attending school since your undergraduate years according to the administration office. They had the records up on the screen and double-checked while I was on the phone with them. I hope you realize that it is a serious offense to fraudulently represent yourself. We share personnel profiles with more than fifty hospitals across the region, young lady. I am putting you in the system with an alert to make sure you can't pull a prank like this anywhere else. The liability we would have if we were to hire someone with a false medical degree is not acceptable. You are lucky I am not calling the authorities about this."

Sakura nodded and quickly exited the building, her mind reeling. How had they done it? How had they erased six years of experience from record? She had known it would be bad for her once Itachi had woken up. She wished, not for the first time, that she had never pulled that stupid stunt. It had been spur of the moment, and she hadn't thought it through at all. She wondered what had happened to them once Naruto had returned to Japan. She saw in the news that they appeared to be together again, and was surprised to feel relief. As much as she had hated Sasuke and been jealous of Naruto, she had never intended it to go so far and nearly destroy two people. She hadn't fully realized the weight of the guilt she had been under until it was lifted.

There were only two hospitals in the city that were unaffiliated with the one she had just applied to. She wondered how she could get around this. She had a copy of her degree and transcript, but they would still require official confirmation before hiring her. She thought quickly about her reference list, and how many of them would be swayed by the Uchiha influence. If Itachi had fully disclosed what she had done... she had taken advantage of a medical emergency to create falsely compromising photos of a relatively high ranking member of society. Her reputation back in Japan would be in shreds. She had hoped to simply fall back on her grades and transcripts, relying on the fact that few of her supervisors had spoken English well enough to want to give a phone interview with an overseas employer. But now, with those records gone at least temporarily, she was in trouble.

She walked across the street to a diner and ordered a cup of coffee, her mind feeling numb.

"Miss?" The cashier looked at her. "Do you have another card? This one has been declined."

The sinking feeling increased. This was not a coincidence. Sakura pulled out some cash that she had in her pocket. She would bet anything that if she used her debit card, she was going to be in for a similar surprise.

"Are you ok? Is there anything I can do to help?"

Sakura turned to see a man looking at her with concern in his eyes. He had the friendliest face and largest eyebrows that Sakura had ever seen in her life.

-xXx-

Naruto and Sasuke admitted defeat as they looked at the boxes yet to be unpacked and the limited space in Naruto's modest apartment. Even with the majority of Sasuke's belongings being sold or sent into storage, there just was not enough space.

Naruto sighed. "You have more shit than anyone else I have ever known."

Sasuke scowled. He never really considered himself materialistic, because he held no attachment to most of his physical belongings, except for maybe his clothing. But it was true that somehow he had ended up with an inordinate amount of stuff. Especially in comparison to the blond, who seemed to be content basically living out of a suitcase.

Naruto laughed at his husband's expression. "So, do you still have the name of your realtor? I think we are going to need to find a larger place."

Sasuke looked at Naruto, gauging his reaction to see if this was causing an issue for the blond. "Why don't we just talk to the landlord and see if there are larger apartments available in this building?"

Naruto walked over and wrapped his arms around his lover. "It's fine, Sasuke. Let's find a place that suits us both. Something big enough for all your expensive shit, but not so high brow that I feel like I need to be going in through the servant's entrance."

Sasuke's gaze sharpened, and he caught Naruto by the chin. "Don't ever think that you need to go in through the servant's entrance. I don't care if you are visiting the fucking queen of England."

Naruto just rolled his eyes, then fused their lips together. This was clearly going to be a theme that Sasuke was going to continue to push.

. . .

"I'm sure I will be able to find you a suitable place, gentlemen. Let's just confirm the basics. You are looking for an apartment with a master suite, a guest bedroom, two offices, two bathrooms, and in a part of town that is nice but not as high end as where you have been living, Uchiha-san?"

They both nodded.

"And in term of selecting the neighborhood, what should we look at? Obviously safety and proximity to your office, but what about things like proximity to schools or hospitals? Sometimes those can be important selling features as well. I'm assuming you are planning on keeping this place for at least 5 years, so you should think long term about it."

Naruto talked through some of these additional selling factors with the realtor, but soon realized that Sasuke had taken on a distracted look. If it had been anyone else, Naruto would have used the term 'spacing out'. But Uchiha Sasuke did not space out.

"Hey, let's pick this up again tomorrow. We still have some things to think through in terms of what we need, and I don't want to waste your time," Naruto told the realtor, wanting to find out just what was going on with his husband.

Sasuke had refocused, but rather than refuting anything that Naruto said he simply nodded to the realtor and showed him to the door.

When he came back, Naruto was looking at him carefully.

"Having second thoughts?" Naruto asked, keeping his voice level, not sure what was going on inside the frequently overly complex brain of his husband.

"Yes," Sasuke said flatly.

Naruto felt his palms tingle with nerves. "Weren't you the one all in a hurry to move in together? We don't have to do it. I can rescind the two months notice we gave on the lease on my place and-"

"That's not what I'm talking about, moron. I am _not_ having second thoughts about living with you." Sasuke crossed over to stand directly in front of Naruto, glaring eye to eye with him as though daring him to doubt his commitment.

"Ok, so why the freak-out then?"

Sasuke scoffed at the term being applied to him. "I was not freaking out. I was just thinking."

"You are usually able to accomplish that without the complete shut-down that you just did when the realtor was talking to us about how many rooms and in what part of town we wanted to live in."

Sasuke stood for a minute, clearly debating on what to say.

"Just say it. You want to stay in the fancy part of town? Right?"

"I was thinking that maybe... we should get an extra bedroom. Given that this is going to be our place for the longer-term."

"Ok, so... we already said we need a home office and a guest room. If you want another extra bedroom, I guess that's fine. It will cost more, but it won't be a problem."

Naruto looked at Sasuke, still trying to figure out why the need for an extra bedroom appeared to be bringing on some sort of mental epiphany for his friend.

Sasuke turned and walked over to the orange couch and sat down, looking over at Naruto expectantly.

Naruto rolled his eyes, but followed Sasuke over and sat down. He grabbed Sasuke's shoulder and pulled him down so his head was in Naruto's lap. Naruto immediately began gently massaging Sasuke's scalp. "Ok. Now are you going to tell me what is going on inside that head of yours? My psychic powers are down today."

Sasuke grunted, enjoying the feeling of Naruto's skilled fingers causing the tension to slowly drain from his body.

"I was thinking less about the extra room, and more about who might occupy it."

Naruto's fingers paused, then started up again. "You want Itachi to move in with us? I get the feeling somehow that he is enjoying his privacy these days."

Sasuke frowned, not wanting to think about that. "No. Not Itachi. I was thinking... someone much younger."

Naruto stopped, feeling like somehow he must be jumping to completely wrong conclusions.

"Are you saying... what are you saying, Sasuke?"

Sasuke swallowed, then turned so he was laying on his back, looking directly up at Naruto. "You and I both had pretty shitty childhoods. We both lost our families at early ages."

Naruto looked at him, a strange feeling starting to settle in his stomach.

"But we became each other's family. You and me with Itachi. And I was thinking... maybe it's time to add someone else to the mix."

Naruto's chest seized. "You're saying... you want to try to adopt a _baby_?"

"Actually, I was more thinking an older kid."

Naruto's eyes widened, then slowly a smile spread across his face. A smaller but no less intense small was mirrored on the face of the man laying in his lap. Sasuke took family seriously. He would never suggest something like this if there was any chance at all that their relationship wouldn't last, if he weren't absolutely sure he wanted to be together for the long haul.

And adopting an older kid... they both knew how difficult it was for older kids to find homes. And Sasuke had first-had experience in feeling the loss of his parents as a 12-year-old. He would know how to relate to a child who went through something similar and wasn't fortunate enough to have an older brother of age to care for him. They could provide stability for someone who had gone through what they had. And they could build a family together. Naruto's mind struggled to wrap itself around the idea of a real family, something that he had always wanted but assumed would never happen.

"Do you really think we're ready for that?" Naruto asked, feeling excited and terrified at the same time.

"Right now? _Hell_ , no. But in a couple of years..."

"Yeah, you seriously need to practice on your nurturing side. We should probably start with cats or something and work our way up."

Sasuke frowned, either at the thought that he needed practice at anything, or the idea of pets. Probably both.

"Well?" Sasuke asked, deciding to simply ignore Naruto's flip remark.

Naruto blew out a breath. "Yeah. Let's get one more bedroom, then."

Sasuke smirked. "You're going to be a great mom."

"Fuck you, asshole," Naruto's voice roughened as Sasuke adjusted his position in the blond's lap. It was the weekend, after all.

-xXx-

**The end.**

I actually rewrote the ending of this chapter a few times.  I was deciding whether to keep a final scene that actually had Naruto getting cats and Sasuke pretending to be disinterested in them until Naruto catches Sasuke asleep on the couch with the kittens on his chest. It was cute but after re-reading the fic (which I always do several times before posting my final chapter), I decided it was just too sweet for this fic to end on kittens. I mean seriously... that is just too much fluff for this I think. It might appear in an epilogue, which I will most likely at some point write for this fic, but that will be a long ways off (months) so am marking it as complete for now. I need to spend some time to think about what else I want to do with it. If you have ideas or a 'wish list', let me know. And yes, if they do adopt someone, it will likely be Konohamaru (obviously).

If you have read this whole story and never commented, all I can say is I wrote you 80k words... can you just write me 5 to let me know how you liked it? I actually really value comments/input. And it gives me inspiration to write other stories, etc.


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